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Original poster

One boy/ One girl obsession- true?

153 replies

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 28/07/2020 17:24

Disclaimer: ultimately we all want healthy children and love them no matter their sex

But
Currently pregnant with DD2 and the check out lady at Sainsbury’s today was chatting to me, asked me what I was having, whether I have a boy or girl already etc. when I said I was having another girl she tilted her head to the side, pursed her lips together and said “aww (tut) well that’s ok (shrug)”.....Hmm

Does everyone want one of each, a boy and a girl? Honestly if I could have decided I would have wanted two girls (not that I wouldn’t love a boy- see the disclaimer).
So just a random poll, if you could pick the number of children and their sex what would you pick?

OP posts:
Chirpychirpy3 · 28/07/2020 17:27

I would want two dd. I think it’s nice to have two the same and I have a dd.

Theforest · 28/07/2020 17:28

I have heard comments from friends who have one of each that they have the perfect family because of that. I just ignore it.

I have 2 boys and wouldnt have it any other way.

OverTheRainbow88 · 28/07/2020 17:30

I genuinely see the ideal in both situations, 2 the same seems nicer for the kids, maybe one of each is nicer for parents... I may be totally wrong! I’ve got 2 the same!

Interested in this thread?

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Families
BlusteryShowers · 28/07/2020 17:30

I have a boy and girl and everyone tells me I am so lucky. While I am of course pleased to have two lovely children, there was a part of me when pregnant who thought that a second boy would be easier and they would be more likely to be close as adults.

This comes purely from my own lack of experience of opposite sex siblings in the wider family. All are same sex.

LovingLola · 28/07/2020 17:32

I have one of each. Very happy to have had one of each. Would have been equally happy to have had both the same.

mylittlesandwich · 28/07/2020 17:32

In the unlikely event that I have another I'd rather have another boy tbh. I already have lots of boys clothes etc. A wee girl would be nice too though and there's plenty of DSs clothes that would do fine for a girl. I think growing up he may rather have a brother than a sister to play with though?

OneForMeToo · 28/07/2020 17:33

We where told to stop at two as we have the perfect family of one boy followed by one girl. We had a third Grin

highlandcoo · 28/07/2020 17:47

MIL who liked to pride herself on "speaking the truth" greeted the news of my third pregnancy with:

"What are you having another one for? You've got one of each. It's not fair on (her son)" Confused

SunbathingDragon · 28/07/2020 17:50

When I was pregnant with DD3 some people insisted on telling me that I was aiming for a boy. I really wasn’t.

Twickerhun · 28/07/2020 17:50

I wanted two the same not one of each. I love what I got Tho and would only change them if I could have a version that sleeps sometimes not because of their genitals.

pepperycinnamon · 28/07/2020 17:53

I didn't mind one way or the other but once I'd had my first everybody assumed I wanted the opposite sex for my second. Oddly, once I had one of each everybody still made assumptions about what I wanted DC#3 to be Confused

BertieBotts · 28/07/2020 17:53

In my fantasy world where childbirth doesn't hurt and cars/houses/incomes/energy magically expand to fill the need, I would keep going until I didn't have a single of one sex. So could be 2 girls or 2 boys but if I had one girl and one boy then I'd be having at least two more until each had a same sex sibling!

In reality I have two boys but they are ten years apart so don't "count" for my original plan :o DH wants one more and hopes for a girl partially because he has always pictured himself with a daughter, and partly because he wants one of each.

I think two the same is nice if they are close in age as they tend to play together.

takemetomars · 28/07/2020 17:57

I didn't care but felt happy that my second was a different sex

SugarHour · 28/07/2020 17:58

2 the same seems nicer for the kids, maybe one of each is nicer for parents

This. I have two boys and wonder if a girl would have been different (though my boys are very different), if I could have chosen I would have liked to experience parenting both sexes. But I think in general, obviously not always, same sex siblings are closer than opposite sex ones, at least as adults.

JamesArthursEyelashes · 28/07/2020 18:01

I have a boy and a girl and have had the ‘perfect family’ comments from people. 🙄 I think only people who go in for gender stereotypes would think this way. Both my kids are into gaming so if I’d be pretty disappointed if I wanted a girl that did ballet and liked shopping.

When I was pregnant with our second my son wanted a brother but he’s really close to his sister. They have a lovely relationship.

Twizbe · 28/07/2020 18:01

I have one of each and I wanted two boys. I didn't know what I was having either time and I did suffer with some gender disappointment after my daughter was born (I adore her and did from the moment she arrived, but I was sad my second boy never existed)

I've been told I was clever to get one of each. I never got that comment as it had nothing to do with me

Newpuppymummy · 28/07/2020 18:03

Wanted two girls and got two girls. If I had another one I would prefer a girl too.

Hardbackwriter · 28/07/2020 18:10

I'm pregnant with no. 2 and have a very, very slight preference for another boy - I also think same-sex siblings are usually closer and also I kind of just want another DS (obviously I won't feel like this when no. 2 is here and I'll love them for being their own, distinct person!). I got a surprising - and horrible - number of slightly putting/disappointed comments when I told people I was having a boy first time round, though, so I expect if it is another boy I'll get some infuriating comments about it.

In my, anecdotal experience people just seem to prefer girls - on of each is fine but so is two girls, it's two sons that gets treated as a shame. Gender disappointment threads on MN are always about boys.

SageRosemary · 28/07/2020 18:15

For our first, I didn't mind, a healthy baby at my age was a blessing. When I was pregnant with our second baby, I was hoping for a sister for my DD1 and that's who arrived. I had medical advice not to try for a third baby, DH would have loved a third, me too, and to be fair he never said he wanted a boy and he is besotted with our DDs.

It's strange that my brothers had boys and I had girls.

Growing up, my mother would always pass comment that "oh, it's such a pity that there's no boy to carry on the family name", referring to friends or cousins or distant relatives (or their wives) who gave birth to girls. Now, I tell her that if I hadn't had a daughter, the female line from her mother would have died out despite the large family.

Lelophants · 28/07/2020 18:20

I'd love one of each but I'd also love to see how two same sex siblings interact with each other (and how different they look!)

Ah well, better have 3 Grin

JamesArthursEyelashes · 28/07/2020 18:22

Growing up, my mother would always pass comment that "oh, it's such a pity that there's no boy to carry on the family name",

Thank goodness views like this are slowly dying out. My daughter has said that if she does get married and have children, her children will have her surname. She thinks it’s sexist to take your husbands name and for it to be assumed that kids get their dads name. We’ve never married and I’d probably have given my children my surname if I didn’t associate it will my twat of a father.

Marmite27 · 28/07/2020 18:22

I didn’t care what DC1 was (I thought she was a boy tbh) but I wanted 2 of the same. So by default I wanted (and got) a girl with DC2.

Had DD1 been a DS, I’d have wanted another boy.

5lilducks · 28/07/2020 18:32

When I was pregnant with DD I recall a few of my colleagues at work saying that one should have one of each ideally. I have got a lovely DD, and if I had a choice I would love to have another little girl.

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 28/07/2020 18:42

I have one of each and when I was as pregnant with DS I had a certain amount of disappointment when I found out he was a he at my scan. DD was so perfect in my eyes that I just wanted her all over again - plus I wanted to give her a sister.

Of course the moment DS was born he was perfect in my eyes too, and I wouldn't swap him for anything. They do fight a lot though, and sometimes I wonder if they'd get on better if they were the same sex!

Ladycoo1 · 28/07/2020 18:58

I have one of each. Just feel incredibly lucky to have have two children.