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One boy/ One girl obsession- true?

153 replies

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 28/07/2020 17:24

Disclaimer: ultimately we all want healthy children and love them no matter their sex

But
Currently pregnant with DD2 and the check out lady at Sainsbury’s today was chatting to me, asked me what I was having, whether I have a boy or girl already etc. when I said I was having another girl she tilted her head to the side, pursed her lips together and said “aww (tut) well that’s ok (shrug)”.....Hmm

Does everyone want one of each, a boy and a girl? Honestly if I could have decided I would have wanted two girls (not that I wouldn’t love a boy- see the disclaimer).
So just a random poll, if you could pick the number of children and their sex what would you pick?

OP posts:
JamesArthursEyelashes · 29/07/2020 07:39

But whether I had boys or girls, I'd raise them the same way.

So why did you want boys then? Why did it matter that you were ‘used to boys’ if you would raise them the same?

MrsJBaptiste · 29/07/2020 07:56

I have two the same and that's exactly what I would have wanted, whether that be two girls or two boys.

Nighttown · 29/07/2020 08:59

I only ever wanted one child and was completely indifferent to its sex.

Interested in this thread?

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Families
Jimdandy · 29/07/2020 09:01

I would have preferred two of the same sex. Not bothered which!

I got girl and boy which is still lovely and amazing!

I do not believe in having children until you get the sex you want. I think it’s treating the ones you’ve got as not good enough/second class.

Peachypips78 · 29/07/2020 17:12

I would have two boys, and I do! They are best mates.

MinnieJackson · 29/07/2020 19:39

I've had four boys and after the first two you could see the disappointment in MILs face lol. Loads of people saying 'are you going to try for a girl?' Or that dh and I need to get a tv...Hmm

Letmegetthisrightasawoman · 29/07/2020 19:57

well done for calling it sex (not gender) OP.

I have a boy and currently pregnant again. I had always thought I'd have girls, but now I've got one boy I think I'd like another. It's probably because until embarrassingly recently I had this idea in my head that the sex of your kids says something about your personality. One of each just seemed so twee/ such a cliche, especially a boy first and then a girl. I am fully aware that this is completely bonkers thinking, it must have come from being a kid and playing families or something.

FWIW, in my head my unborn baby is a girl and has a name already, but when I think about life a year from now I picture two boysSmile

Anon234 · 29/07/2020 20:12

I've got 3 DDs, only ever wanted girls (although of course would have been delighted if any of them had been a boy). I get so fed up of people saying "aw 3 girls...are you going to keep going until you have a boy?". Honestly, piss off, Jean, I have 3 healthy daughters. I don't need/want a son to 'complete' my family. It's just so irritating and borderline offensive to DD2 and DD3.

JanewaysBun · 29/07/2020 20:14

If I were able to chose I would like 2 of each,

OverTheRainbow88 · 30/07/2020 10:59

Yea I would love 2 of each children. Not sure about going through the baby stage though!!

TimeWastingButFun · 30/07/2020 11:04

Two boys here, 12 and 10, and they are really good friends, play together all the time and enjoy exactly the same things. So much easier! I originally would have liked for a girl at the time only because my husband doesn't have any girls, and now there are 4 boys! But ever since the scan for our second showed it was a boy I haven't regretted if for a moment.

midnightstar66 · 30/07/2020 11:53

I know lots of people who want one of each so I guess the reaction is personal to her. Personally I always only wanted girls and won't even pretend I would have been equally happy to find out I was having a boy.

SomethingLessBoringInstead · 30/07/2020 12:01

I have one of each.

Can't say I had a preference beforehand and no opinion on it since.

I doubt it would be any different whatever I'd had!

SugarHour · 30/07/2020 12:02

@midnightstar66

I know lots of people who want one of each so I guess the reaction is personal to her. Personally I always only wanted girls and won't even pretend I would have been equally happy to find out I was having a boy.
What would you have done if you'd had a boy? If you'd had a boy and a girl would you have loved the girl more? Why did you have children at all when there was a 50/50 chance each one could be a boy?

Not judging, just curious, as that seems quite a strong preference. It may well have worked out ok - I never imagined I'd have all boys (or even a boy at all tbh!) as I was raised by a single mum and have a sister, it just wasn't in my experience. But I love having boys! I did always enjoy spending time with little boys though (worked with kids), just never imagined having one (never mind two) of my own. I'm sure I'd have loved girls/one of each just as much though.

Dogsaresomucheasier · 30/07/2020 12:08

If I lived in Bertiebot’s universe I’d do the same; keep going until I had two of each. Mrs Weasley is my heroine.

tillytoodles1 · 30/07/2020 12:09

I've got one of each, they're both healthy which is the main thing.

midnightstar66 · 30/07/2020 12:10

@SugarHour I've no idea how I can know that. DD1 I was told at an early scan was a boy and I was a bit disappointed but obviously still excited to be having my first child, i was extremely happy when that turned out to be wrong though. DD2 wasn't planned but I hoped she would be a girl too. I'm sure I would love a boy equally if that's what happened, but as I said I can't know exactly how I'd feel, but it was definitely 2 girls that I wanted.

Shutupyoutart · 30/07/2020 12:30

I don't think it necessarily follows that same sex will be closer. Im the oldest of four( gbgb) and while i love all of my siblings as an adult im closer to my youngest brother there's 8 years age gap between us. I have 4 children 3 girls and 1 boy ggbg. Didn't care about the sex on any of them. So long as they were healthy and happy but everyone assumed we wanted dd3 to be a boy!

mrscatmad31 · 30/07/2020 12:39

I have two girls, when I was pregnant with DD2 I had people asking me if my DH wanted a boy? I told them he didn't care either way but I'm sure they didn't believe me. I love having two daughters and if I ever had another one it would be weird to have a boy although I wouldn't really care

SugarHour · 30/07/2020 12:46

[quote midnightstar66]@SugarHour I've no idea how I can know that. DD1 I was told at an early scan was a boy and I was a bit disappointed but obviously still excited to be having my first child, i was extremely happy when that turned out to be wrong though. DD2 wasn't planned but I hoped she would be a girl too. I'm sure I would love a boy equally if that's what happened, but as I said I can't know exactly how I'd feel, but it was definitely 2 girls that I wanted. [/quote]
Fair enough Smile

whichteaareyou · 30/07/2020 13:46

I either want two boys or two girls. I have 2 sisters and a brother and my DH has one sister and I can't imagine not having a sister and I would love for my brother to have a brother so for that reason I want two of each!

Chanel05 · 30/07/2020 13:58

I'm having a daughter and I have had the odd negative comment about keeping on the family name and various gender stereotypes that she won't want to go to football games with various family members.

If we are lucky enough in the future to have another child then I honestly wouldn't care less what sex they are.

Shouldbedancingyeah · 30/07/2020 14:01

Ideally I’d love 2 boys and 2 girls

However if I never ended up having a son I wouldn’t be that upset. On the other hand if I never had a daughter, I’d be devastated and probably would never get over it

SugarHour · 30/07/2020 14:03

@Shouldbedancingyeah

Ideally I’d love 2 boys and 2 girls

However if I never ended up having a son I wouldn’t be that upset. On the other hand if I never had a daughter, I’d be devastated and probably would never get over it

Devastated is a strong word to use. Just curious, what do you think a daughter would give you that a son wouldn't?
creamorwhite · 30/07/2020 14:07

I have one DD and if I were to have another child I would want another girl. Before having DD I had no preference at all so I think loving her so much has made me favour girls!