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Original poster

How much child maintenence do you get?

178 replies

Childmaintenence · 07/06/2020 13:24

Hope this doesn't come accross as being nosey (absolutely not intended). NC ex gives me £140 p/m for 3yo DD.

Interested in what others get to see whether I'm being unreasonable in challenging this

OP posts:
hotstepper4 · 07/06/2020 21:00

3 dc not 2..

FedUpofLockdown123 · 07/06/2020 21:08

£0 for 2 children. I could go through CMS and get roughly £7 per week for them but it would cost me £20 to make the application and to be honest it's an insult I would rather have nothing.

DoneWithLove · 07/06/2020 21:09

A big fat £0 for 3 kids.

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3 year olds
milkysmum · 07/06/2020 21:14

Beelola - unfortunately I don't think CMS will be if any help to you. It seems to be very common that men are working cash in hand to avoid payment towards their children. CMS know it they just can't do anything about it.

AlovelybitofsquirrelJackie · 07/06/2020 21:20

Supposed to get around £260 based on his declared earnings (he earns thousands extra freelancing on the side) but currently getting £25. I've escalated CMS not pursuing him and others like him through their complaints procedure and MP but not getting far. When he did pay the full amount he wouldn't dream of contributing a penny more for any reason whatsoever. Me and the kids use the £25 for a takeaway once a month.

Original poster
Childmaintenence · 07/06/2020 22:16

@Familylawsolicitor I'm unsure whether that was aimed at me or another PP but if so, ours is through a private agreement. Or should I say what he deemed he could afford.

He made it clear he dispised of CMS, and as he's self employed, I'm unsure whether to bother with a claim

OP posts:
pinkkoala · 07/06/2020 22:44

£204 a month for 15 year old dd, which barely covers anything, took me two years to get anything as went through cms, he refused to send wage slips in, his employer was not sending everything in, so he then ended up paying me arrears, but now back to normal of 204 a month, thats based on him having her 2 nights a week while i work 2 night shifts as hca, he has her maybe one a night a fortnight at the moment as i am working different shifts to cover staff that are off shielding or have symptoms. And he doesn't help with anything else like school trips, uniform or anything big.
His new wife to be has a hold on his bank account and watches what he spends with dd. But she will happily let my ex h spend it on her, she likes her weekends away and nice restaurants, and on her dd.
Cms due for review in july and i am sure the amount will drop again.

pinkkoala · 07/06/2020 22:47

I should also add he says to dd i give your mum 204 a month for you so she can get you whatever is you want.
Causes big arguments as i keep explaining to dd its for your living costs and things like clothes, shoes etc.
He thinks my new partner should finance dd.

Icanflyhigh · 07/06/2020 22:50

£50.06 per week between three DCs aged 15, 10 and 8.

Secretsout · 07/06/2020 22:51

£728. Worked out 3 years ago based on child spending 2 nights per week with his dad. He's not had an overnight stay or any contact for 18 months. Private arrangement using CMS as a guide but Ex earns £200k, well over CMS higher rate threshold.

SavageBeauty73 · 07/06/2020 22:53

Zero for 3 expensive teenagers 🙄🙄🙄

managedmis · 08/06/2020 02:58

Why can these men get away with this??!!

Gingerkittykat · 08/06/2020 04:18

@managedmis

Why can these men get away with this??!!
Because there is not the political will to change things.

The CMS already have the powers to take driving licenses and passports but have never done so.

I bet if it was a problem which predominantly meant that men were going without money then they would suddenly start to take it seriously and enforce payments.

sofato5miles · 08/06/2020 05:19

Being over the cms threshold does not exempt you, they can calculate it through court.

Just going through it, though my ex is reasonable and we worked it out ourselves

GlummyMcGlummerson · 08/06/2020 06:58

Well when I first left Ex he wanted to pay £50 month for 2 kids as that's what he declared he was obliged to pay. He wasn't wrong - he's self employed but has fiddled his books for years so on paper that's all he earns.

However - and I have MN to thank for this advice - before I left I took copies of his business paperwork and bank statements. He lived with his mum for a bit and I spent hour upon hour photocopying as i KNEW the tight bastard would stiff me. Once he made his paltry offer i said if you do that I will take these to HMRC oh and I'll also use the many clips of ring door bell footage I saved to show how abusively you speak to me and the children if it comes to going to court. And the messages which proved he cheated on me with a teenager.

He shit himself at the thought of me being so ruthless (he thought his control could carry on past our marriage) and agreed to pay what he should pay had he declared his income properly - so I get £400 a month. He now does declare his income properly (and is glad to with the COVID 80% scheme) and the vast majority of the time the time pays in full on time.

GlummyMcGlummerson · 08/06/2020 07:04

He says he is considering paying and he is putting money in a bank account for when he is older

Ugh my ex tried that, no dipshit that's not the point of maintenance! Also it wouldn't happen.

Forgot to mention with my £400 a month ex has them EOW and part of the school holidays. He doesn't buy clothes for them, doesn't contribute to school trips, birthday parties (spent £20 on DD 8 birthday present which I had to nag him to remember) and doesn't take them anywhere nice. He's loaded but tight as a duck's arse.

GlummyMcGlummerson · 08/06/2020 07:08

I bet if it was a problem which predominantly meant that men were going without money then they would suddenly start to take it seriously and enforce payments

Yep.

It's a problem that predominantly affects women so therefore no one gives a crap sadly

ELW85 · 08/06/2020 07:15

@Gingerkittykat @GlummyMcGlummerson - not sure how the CMS operates so inconsistently (see my post) as they were in touch with DH within weeks.
The flip side is for men like my DH who have gone above and beyond paying for their kids (nothing to be applauded, I know, all men should do this) the calculation includes things like OT which are variable and we’ve had to overpay when his OT has been non-existent through no fault of his own.
The entire system needs overhauled if it’s failing so many.

vampirethriller · 08/06/2020 07:18

Nothing.

GlummyMcGlummerson · 08/06/2020 07:19

@ELW85 I didn't actually go through the CMS, but would if he stopped paying or got arsey about the payment amounts. No he's declaring his income properly (only on pain of me reporting him) I would hope it would be pretty straight forward. If I hadn't had good foresight and copied his paperwork though I guarantee he'd be screwing me out of every penny he could

Napssavelives · 08/06/2020 07:30

I’m very lucky and get £1000pcm for 3 children

ELW85 · 08/06/2020 07:33

@GlummyMcGlummerson - that’s awful! I’m really sorry he’s a massive shit that would do that to you and your child, but pleased you’ve got him in check.
My dad never paid a penny for me; an age old problem, it seems.

Gingerkittykat · 08/06/2020 07:40

[quote ELW85]**@Gingerkittykat* @GlummyMcGlummerson* - not sure how the CMS operates so inconsistently (see my post) as they were in touch with DH within weeks.
The flip side is for men like my DH who have gone above and beyond paying for their kids (nothing to be applauded, I know, all men should do this) the calculation includes things like OT which are variable and we’ve had to overpay when his OT has been non-existent through no fault of his own.
The entire system needs overhauled if it’s failing so many.[/quote]
The problem is for the men who are determined not to pay there are so many loopholes. One is not responding for as long as possible, another is working cash in hand, it took a very long time for me to get a deductions of earnings order but then he starts a new job as soon as the order starts, it takes a few months to set up the new one and then they change job again. Another is being self employed and only declaring a tiny portion of true earnings.

I'm sure the system screws over some decent men too but it seems to be mostly the resident parent and their children who suffer under the current system.

xxlostxx · 08/06/2020 07:42

Zero for 2 children. For 11 years. No contact, his choice. The twat made sure he was self employed and works cash only.

AtLastEarwax · 08/06/2020 07:42

I'm a child whose parent got CM I don't get it myself but I know he paid about £56 something a month. When it was time for me to leave school/stay on for sixth form I stayed on for a levels. Got called into the heads office, my dad had rang to clarify I was still there and did he still have to pay. How embarrassed was I....