Canal boat: Four 18/19 year old lads...

[Miljea]

Aaaaaand... breathe!

The mothers of the other three lads are probably on here, at a guess! That would be funny.

My DS, 18, Year out from uni, is lovely. And clueless. He's not huge on RL friends (at all), but, frankly, his RL friends, such as they are, only seem to get together in cyberspace.

Months ago DS mentioned a canal boat trip, with these other guys, for a lad's birthday. In Feb, somewhere in the Midlands. DS was at sixth form with the now-at-uni inviter, who has a uni mate and a 'local to his uni' mate to make up the 4.

I thought it would die a death, but it hasn't.

Like I said, DS is sweetly clueless.

My concerns?

Getting along the south coast. He's never caught a train alone- even a bus, other than a school one! This is Southampton to Brighton. With a change.

Driving from Brighton to the midlands with an unknown teenage driver.

Arriving late and all going yadda yadda yadda about How The Boat Works (tho the inviter has done it before, as has my DS, albeit in a 'someone else taking responsibility' (us) way.). Then bouncing off into the dark.

Not understanding what are feasible journey times. That you can't travel by night. Knowing the electrical capabilities of the boat, versus battery charge 😊 And water supply. Ending up at pubs to eat, otherwise bringing food, to reheat. Who is planning all that without being derided?

Having a cold, dark, wet, miserable 5 days because no one took control of the situation.

Obviously I need to go along to Make It All Alright 😂😂 but....

Learning experience? Brilliant holiday? Or catastrophe?

Bearing in mind, come Sept, he might be at a uni a 5 hour, inc cross-London train trip away.. 😮 We'll never see him again.

But I almost fear he doesn't know what he doesn't know.

I may be feeling rather anxious about it......

They probably won't get any company to accept a stag party type booking.

Having spent five brilliant days on a narrow boat in my youth I'd be inclined to recommend it to him. As a parent I'd say not a hope in hell but he's an adult and needs to make his own mind up.

Agree with PP, most companies won’t hire to single sex groups and probs not to 18 year olds either.

Now then, 18 year old never taken a bus or train alone? That needs sorting pronto.

He's 18. Of course he can catch a train (with a change). Of course they can organise food. When they get hungry they'll find some. Doing the boat things, they'll be told the rules and how to refill the water etc. Really, you're doing him a disservice thinking he won't cope. How else will he learn other than by having a go?

It's already well and truly booked!

I’m a former live aboard boater- they run the risk of being turned away by the boat hire company if they rock up just a group of 5 teenage lads. I know quite a few hire companies on the GU won’t lease to young male parties any more.

They’ll have a miserable time of it if they’ve never boated alone- what happens when the prop gets fouled? Or they don’t get the weed hatch back down quick enough? Do they know what to do if they have a runaway engine scenario (it does happen with the Listers sometimes). How about managing the stove- do you trust they won’t give themselves carbon monoxide poisoning?

And finally- the thought of a troupe of unseasoned lads crashing their way alone down the cut is enough to make me want to find a backwater to tie up in. And I don’t even live aboard anymore

For the love of goodness go with them!

The boat is already booked. They won't be turned away.

I'm not sure I would want to go away with them! Imagine the smell... 😊

The lad in whose name has apparently got recent canal boat experience.

But that's as much as I know! My DS knows how a lock works.. argh.

Has your son got SEN issues?

Of not, then he needs to grow up and fast!

NO. Teenagers on a boat and likely drinking...a friend of mine broke a leg very badly on canal boat falling off and getting it crushed between a wall and the boat.

Sounds like he and they might learn some useful life lessons tbh - travelling, having to arrange their own food etc, the best way to learn how to fend for yourself (especially if an 18yo can't even travel by bus or train themselves) is to have to do it!

December that's a bit harsh.

My DS isn't on any spectrum, nor has SEN. He, like many, many you g people, today, find it easier to engage on-line than in RL.

He isn't heading 30 minutes down the road to a caravan park with 3 sort of inter-related lads; the plan is train to Brighton, with a change in Portsmouth; arrangement to get to mate's house; drive to the Midlands, to canal boat hire place; have plans for four nights pre-arranged in terms of food; execute plan with no major issue, and return home.

With respect, I don't know a lot of 18 year olds to whom that's a stroll in the park!

Not 'can't ever' travel by bus or train; more 'hasn't ever'.

There's a difference.

He’s 18 and never travelled by bus?

Have you ever thought you might be smothering him?

Your concerns are really OTT.

I have worked since I was 13.
Did 3 part time jobs while I did my a-levels.
Managed to book & pay for a self-catering holiday to the Canaries with my BF when I was 18, including travel to/from the airport, sorting a budget for the week and we had a very good time.
A 4 day trip in the UK on a canal shouldn't be impossible for someone who might be leaving home & going to Uni in a few months.

If he has never caught a train or bus at 18 then he is not “sweetly clueless.” What have you (not) been teaching him? This thread is eye opening!

Oh, FGS. Smothering him?

How did he get to primary school? 1.5 miles. Walk

How did he get to secondary school? 2.5 miles. Yes, there was a bus that was always late, with commensurate detention, so- cycled.

How did he get to sixth form, 3 miles? No bus, cycled.

How does he go to Tech? 3 miles, no bus, cycled.

Stop Projecting.

Not harsh at all...

His 18.
Does he know how to do laundry? Make food?

Most 18 year olds work, go to uni, live in shared housing.

I was earning my own money at 11....
And working in a huge company at 16, managing people and customers. With a ton of responsibility....

Rainbow how does your experience relate to my concerns? Really?

If we're playing Top Trumps, when I was 17yrs, 9 months, I left everything I'd ever known and went to Bavaria, on an overnight boat train (but with a girl, 19, who'd done it before...) without a word of German, where I worked as a kitchen hand/ chambermaid for 10 months.

So not a probably a comparison to a week's AI to the Canaries!

What do your 18 year olds do for holidays?

I was earning my own money at 11....
And working in a huge company at 16, managing people and customers. With a ton of responsibility....

^

Here we bloody go

@managedmis

Here we go what?

Its true.

18 year olds these days have to let go of mummies hand , get their head out of the computer / phone and grow up

December ah. You don't have a DC of the age, do you?

The question about whether they 'go to uni', 'do laundry', 'make meals' is yes. His older brother did. Badly 😂

This is four lads setting off on a canal boat. Not a halls of residence.

managedmis next you'll be telling me about a hole in tup middle of tup road....

If you haven’t managed to adequately parent him to a point where he can get public transport on his own and spend a few days on holiday with his friends, then I’d say now’s as good a time as any to stand back and let him work it out for himself.

Actually, I get the bus thing - living semi rurally with a very poor bus service, my DDs had very rarely been on a bus before they left for university - although they had been on trains to go shopping in the nearest large cities.
Your DS will be fine. Just go over the boating rules with him - including mooring up before dark, not drinking and driving boat etc.