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Londoners - don't be so scared of interacting with other people!

330 replies

backinthebox · 02/01/2020 13:35

I had a proper wtf moment yesterday.

We went to Winter Wonderland in Hyde Park, me, DH and DCs 12 and 9. We do love a good roller coaster. We didn't know which rides we were going to go and and being a bank holiday it was quite busy, so rather than by tokens at each ride we bought a stack of them. We had a great time and when we'd been on everything we wanted to we had 6 tokens (£6 worth) left. We needed to go and get our train so thought we would give them away on our way out. The tokens are valid for all rides, so could have been used on anything from a child's carousel to a roller coaster.

We approached a family who had just arrived and asked them if they had just got here and did they want our unused tokens. The woman just stared at us, shook her head, put her arms around her children and herded them off without a word. Oh, we thought. Weird. So we approached a young couple we had just seen entering WW, and offered the tokens to them. They looked at us and gabbled 'we don't need them' then scuttled away. The kids were bemused by this. Not being deterred, I watched another family with children arriving and took DD to offer the tokens. I assumed a family would not be going to Winter Wonderland with kids for the drinking, so a few ride tokens would be on their list of things to buy. They didn't make eye contact and mumbled 'we'll buy our own.' By this point we definitely needed to be heading off for our train so we set out across Hyde Park. We saw a pair of blokes, one on the phone saying '.... see you inside in a minute...' I asked them if they were going in to Winter Wonderland and they looked at me - one nodded and the other shook his head at the same time. I get it that it was dark, but we were a family of 4 with kids, so hardly axe murderer material!

Eventually we managed to give them to a couple heading that way. The woman said thanks, but held them between forefinger and thumb and passed them instantly to her partner as if they were going to explode.

My DH (who works in London) and my kids (who only go into London for theatre and museum trips) were so amused by our inability to give money away that we decided after the first 3 rebuffs that we would carry on till we managed to give them away. It took 5 goes, and everyone looked at us as though we had 2 heads.

It's no big deal, but this exact attitude was what caused me to move out of London nearly 20 years ago and not look back. I've lived in various northern cities and travel extensively round other major cities around the world with work, and nowhere has the 'we don't talk to strangers' attitude quite like London. It was the busiest and loneliest place I've ever been. It's weird, and a bit sad.

OP posts:
Fraggling · 02/01/2020 13:37

We're fairly good at jumping on knife welding terrorists and lifting buses off unicyclists and so on, so there's that.

Fraggling · 02/01/2020 13:40

I have lived here all my life and love it tbh.

I don't feel in the slightest bit lonely or sad.

I wouldn't go to winter wonderland if you paid me though, very unappealing. Crowded and full of tourists I imagine.

Maybe give London a swerve in future if you don't like it. 8 million people or so live here, you calling us all miserable weirdos I'd a bit much.

Happy new year.

ODFOkaren · 02/01/2020 13:41

I’ve had the opposite experience! I’ve lived in London for 9 years and It’s the friendliest place I’ve ever lived. There’s a real sense of community where I am

I’ve lived all over, from towns to tiny villages (the worst for unfriendly behaviour IME) and have found London to be the friendliest place.

Moving to a small town in the midlands soon and dreading leaving.

WorraLiberty · 02/01/2020 13:44

It's been ages since we've had a small-minded pathetic Londoners bashing thread. What a way to start the new year.

Unless they gave you proof of address, how the fuck do you know they're Londoners?

DreamingofSunshine · 02/01/2020 13:44

There's lots of beggars and scam artists in London who portray themselves as families, not saying you are but I wouldn't take something like you've explained off a stranger.

I LOVE how people don't chat with you in London. I treat the tube as a chance to gather my thoughts, not chat.

APatchyTomCat · 02/01/2020 13:45

I'm a northerner and I'm bristling on behalf of Londoners with your thread title! Grin

I think its probably more to do with where you were and the type of event- people probably wary that it was some kind of scam... not saying you're family look like a gang of shady scammers lol, but in that kind of vast touristy place, we've been told to be careful about people offering things up. Especially at Winter Wonderland, where you feel like you're being openly mugged anyway (never again)

Binterested · 02/01/2020 13:47

You do have to have your wits about you at WW so I think they were right to be dubious even though you were just trying to be nice. WW is full of pickpockets and I am basically on high alert whenever I am near there (we live v nearby and Hyde Park is our local park but I avoid that side of it when WW is on).

GrumpyHoonMain · 02/01/2020 13:47

Londoners are really friendly - my guess is the people you approached were, like you, tourists.

Leafyhouse · 02/01/2020 13:48

Thing is, generally the only people who approach you in London are people that want to beg something off you, or sell you something, or get you to sign their petition / join their church etc. So we clutch our pearls and move on.

So yes, randoms are best avoided as a survival strategy - and did you specify 'for free' or just ask if anyone wanted tokens? People might have been waiting for the sting in the tail where you then state a price...

GertiMJN · 02/01/2020 13:48

Unless they gave you proof of address, how the fuck do you know they're Londoners?

My initial thoughts too.

So many assumptions based on this one experience.

AutumnRose1 · 02/01/2020 13:48

I’m a Londoner

There’s a lot of things I hate about the place nowadays

But people aren’t scared, they just didn’t want to talk to you or take tokens from strangers.

Lordfrontpaw · 02/01/2020 13:49

I used to merrily give my unused day tube tickets to people by the machines when I was going home for the night. No one ever have me the squint eye for it!

Besides - how do you know they were Londoners? And if they were in the park they would have probably already been ‘caught’ by the fake monks who have been doing the rounds there over the holidays (‘here’s a lovely gift! Now sign here...’)

TheCrowFromBelow · 02/01/2020 13:49

I wouldn't have thought that many Londoners are at Winter wonderland though? Its a tourist attraction isn't it?
I expect they were ouf of towners thinking you were going to mug them. At least that's what my SIL thinks will happen to her if she goes.

WorraLiberty · 02/01/2020 13:50

Doesn't London have something like 20 million visitors a year?

TheCrowFromBelow · 02/01/2020 13:50

X post with everyone Grin

Dubya · 02/01/2020 13:51

I agree that many are probably tourists, I found London to be overall very friendly when I lived there, just like anywhere there's people that don't feel comfortable interacting with people they don't know, which is fair enough.

ShirleyPhallus · 02/01/2020 13:52

If they’re attending winter wonderland it’s 90% likely they’re small minded country types, bewildered by the bright lights of the big smoke because actual Londoners would rarely go to somewhere so tourists as WW.

Given that we’re doing shitty stereotypes eh?

Chochito · 02/01/2020 13:52

I'm a Londoner, wouldn't dream of going to Winter Wonderland, wouldn't take tokens from a stranger, consider myself friendly, warm and kind. I always say thank you to the bus driver (like all other Londoners). And I'm not racist.

ThisIsSanta · 02/01/2020 13:53

Wow. I’m glad you left town tbh. Keep your pathetic judgement to yourself, and preferably outside the M25.

Jackiebrambles · 02/01/2020 13:53

So they were people in or on their way to Winter Wonderland? As if they were Londoners! :-D

I'm a Londoner with two kids - no way I'm going to WW. Tried it once when DS was tiny, good god, it was hellish!

Expressedways · 02/01/2020 13:54

They probably weren’t Londoners?! Winter Wonderland is awful and I think mostly frequented by tourists. What you were trying to do was nice, but I agree with PP that it could have come across like it was some sort of scam- you distract with the tokens whilst your urchin children pinch their wallets. Personally I like not having to make small talk with strangers about the weather and I don’t think Londoners are any more or less friendly than inhabitants of any big city, people are just busy and don’t want to get pickpocketed.

DameXanaduBramble · 02/01/2020 13:57

What a crock of shit. They probably thought you were charging them. Londoners are friendly and wouldn’t go to ww anyway.

DownToTheSeaAgain · 02/01/2020 13:58

Winter Wonderland is a little piece of hell that costs ££££. Most Londoners know this and steer clear.

Lordfrontpaw · 02/01/2020 13:58

In fact, I have often given things to random strangers and none of them have exploded.

Once I was buying ice cream for DS and myself and it was a 3 for 2 offer - there was a little girl in the queue behind me and I asked her dad if it was OK if I 'bought' hers on the offer as I only wanted 2. He was fine with that. I have also given a cuddly toy Andrex puppy (it came with a pack of loo roll) to the parents of a little kid in the queue behind me in the supermarket (little kid was so excited). The parents didn't check it for anthrax.

Sharonthetotallyinsane · 02/01/2020 14:00

They’ll be tourists too. Safe trip home.