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WWYD - Feel so betrayed

437 replies

sausageandchips007 · 25/10/2019 17:17

Need some advice please.

We moved house and applied for a school place for our DC - due to circumstances we had to rent, though we ensured we met all the criteria and it was by no means a short term let. We are in this house for at least 2 years and ideally we are looking to buy once those 2 years are up or will just carry on renting where we are.

We came to know that someone wrote a letter to the school telling them that we had given false information and that we had no intention of staying in the area. The school did their investigations with us and found that we had complied with all the criteria etc.

We asked to see a copy of the letter under DPA 2018 and I have just received it. It was handwritten and matches very closely with my best friend. It also had content in it about things which only she knew. She has just asked us to be legal guardians for her 2 DC and her and her DH's power of attorney.

WWYD?

OP posts:
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7
Ariana30 · 26/10/2019 18:05

It's the same, look at the t's, she writes them differently mid word and then start of the word, I don't think many people would do this but they are the same on both pictures... Also the n's are identical, it looks like it is the same writing unfortunately... I'm sorry op xx

LadyBrienne · 26/10/2019 18:19

For what's its worth, and not commenting on the writing because I have no idea, I would ask myself if my friend had access to a computer and printer - if so then likely they would type and print it - I would lean towards the writer of the letter not having access to printer easily and therefore writing a hand written letter - perhaps an older person who is less tech savvy

Lindy2 · 26/10/2019 18:21

I don't think they match. There are several letters that are fairly different.

Are you really going to wreck a good friendship because of a guess about handwriting? I think if your friend sees this she will be very upset.

jessycake · 26/10/2019 18:22

I think an awful lot of information can be obtained by gossip , and by someone who seemed to have a genuine interest and not for seemingly malicious reasons . It is possible they have come by information from several sources and collated together . The writing doesn't look so distinctive its definitely your friend ,Its a really arsey thing to do and you will probably never know the truth.

Tistheseason17 · 26/10/2019 18:24

Initially, I did not think it was the same writing but having revisited the m and the s and the y's are not consistent in the letter which may indicate the effort to hide the style.

I did (sadly) blow it up and put it side by side and found some unique lettering which matched exactly - especially the mMs.

I now think it is your friend.

I would say that you have got a copy of the letter and you have examples of several friends' handwriting and will be getting expert analysis, then say, "Hopefully, whoever wrote this will come forward and acknowledge they wrote it - maybe they can write me a letter!"

NowApparently · 26/10/2019 18:37

With that handwriting, it could have been me that wrote that letter. Scarily similar!

Aunaturalmama · 26/10/2019 18:45

You talk to her of course? Say you saw the letter and ask if she wrote it

Purpleneonpinkunicorns · 26/10/2019 18:52

I don't see why a friend would do this if she thought you were this close with one another, I would invite her round and show her the letter and say you have your suspicions on who it is and see how she reacts.

RiotAndAlarum · 26/10/2019 18:52

I agree with Furiosa that it's a common style of handwriting. Insider information is a bit harder to fake, but it is true that we go around in life leaking data and personal information. The person could have got the info from someone close to you but indiscreet, evrn your best friend.

ragged · 26/10/2019 18:55

Gosh, they are very different handwriting samples, imho. Loads of letters are formed quite differently.

BendyLikeBeckham · 26/10/2019 18:56

I feel for you OP because it's a cuntish thing to do, esp if it was your friend. I don't think it was her FWIW.

If you accuse her unjustly, you've lost her. If you accuse her justly, she wasn't worth keeping. But it's an important call to make.

Also, perhaps dial down the drama a bit. Nobody's "lives are going to be ruined" if you don't get your preferred school choice. First world problems, much.

suggestionsplease1 · 26/10/2019 19:00

I don't think the same person wrote these 2 samples. Be very careful how you proceed!

LazyFace · 26/10/2019 19:03

I also don't think they're the same person.
This must be so stressful and make you feel paranoid.
I hope you find out. And I hope it wasn't your friend.

bigtotwig · 26/10/2019 19:03

Definitely the same person, particularly the 'n' gives it away.

I imagine it's because she doesn't want you to move away, but it's a really awful thing to do.

If you confront her, I think it would be difficult on both sides to remain friends.

Karabair · 26/10/2019 19:06

I think you're right to employ a graphologist. They'll do minute examination uncovering similarities or highlighting differences. You need to be sure one way or the other.

My writing is different when I'm writing a handwritten letter from my normal writing. I'm trying to write more clearly and neatly, so that could account for differences. Also someone writing a poison pen letter like this, might do it in disguise. Whoever is doing this knows you, but wants to hurt you anonymously behind your back, so they might try and distance themselves in a way from the letter by trying to disguise their usual handwriting. A graphologist would be able to spot this.

On the face of it they do look similar.

Very sorry this has happened to you OP. It would make you feel awful, whoever has done it.

mattparle · 26/10/2019 19:08

Confront her for sure.

Buggersticks · 26/10/2019 19:10

They look similar but I can see a few definite differences, the 's' for a start... Be careful before you accuse her. X

raisinseverywhere · 26/10/2019 19:15

Op, be aware that this thread can be lifted and put on DM website.

Karabair · 26/10/2019 19:16

Actually what you need is a forensic handwriting expert, someone who examines documents for courts, rather than someone who deals in personality analysis.

Jaxhog · 26/10/2019 19:19

As she is your 'best friend', why not show her the letter and ask for her advice on who it could be and what to do. Unless she's a very good actress, you'll know pretty quickly if she is responsible.

BeverlyGoldbergsHairAndJumpers · 26/10/2019 19:22

No matter what happens now the friendship is over Sad

Karabair · 26/10/2019 19:22

If it is her, she clearly is a very good actress, because the OP had no idea she had these feelings or would do something like this.

Willweeverfindout · 26/10/2019 19:25

I’m a paleographer - as in I study handwriting. They are similar, but so are so many in modern script. Given that you feel the level of information included was more telling than the handwriting I think the only way to know is to ask her. You’ll then know. She can’t be your friend if she did it, and can’t be your friend if you suspect her. Whichever way it pans out, just ask her. You need to know. Good luck.

kalidasa · 26/10/2019 19:32

I also look at (older) handwriting as part of my job. I don't think those are by the same person. Def get a professional opinion before you say anything.

Mummadeeze · 26/10/2019 19:46

I don’t think it could be your best friend because there is absolutely no reason for her to have done this. Regardless of the handwriting. I mean why would she?

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