Unplanned - Abortion Film **Trigger Warning** Title edited by MNHQ sensitive content*

[Mum2386]

Hi,
Last night I watched a film called Unplanned, which is based on a true story of a lady working within an abortion clinic called ‘Planned Parenthood’. The film itself brought me to tears on many occasions and it’s made me feel very uncomfortable surrounding abortion. I had an unplanned pregnancy with my third child but knew abortion wasn’t an option for me. I am quite shocked by the amount of abortions that still take place within our society. Does anyone else feel this way? I know we all have different views but i just wondered what other people’s thoughts were on this very sensitive topic.

I have cousins who were taken away from their parents and adopted out for various reasons

The older child who was 3ish was adopted very quickly.

The youngest has cerebral palsy and at the age they are at now, around 3, they still can’t sit up or walk or talk. Funnily enough they are still in foster care.

It’s easy to spout that babies can be born and adopted off and yes some are. But most aren’t. Especially
Those with disabilities

@bbgxd
I'm on your side ffs but can we actually analyse stats before just regurgitating them everywhere.

This is very important. The problem with quoting #s children in care is the assumption that all these children were/are unwanted. Yes some were or are unwanted, but not all. A certain number of these children were very much wanted but then orphaned. Another segment will be children of parents in prison and will be returned to those parents when they get out of prison (unless imprisoned for DV or other violent crimes). Another will be children of parents who are experiencing mental health crises and/or homelessness so care again is temporary not permanent. Some are even children of deported illegal immigrants with extended family acting as foster parents. A further segment will be children wanted but for all the wrong reasons, namely as an object to use and abuse.

So, to me the fact that there are children in care and they are not all adopted is very weak evidence that a woman choosing to put her baby up for adoption is dooming it to a life in the care system. The risks of that happening are much more difficult to assess.

@DoctorAllcome
Not at all. Thanks for clarifying. Think we may actually be singing from the same hymn sheet to a degree

@Mum2386 did you do any digging or research on Abby? The woman that is at the centre if this movie?

There are serious doubts not only about her motives(she was placed on a performance improvement plan) but the actual account of the story.. like no record of an ultrasound abortion on that day, no black woman 13 weeks pregnant having an abortion that day and so on.

These is a post she wrote the night she quit,later on claiming it was obviously a coverup for her epiphany.
Alright. Here’s the deal. I have been doing the work of two full time people for two years. Then, after I have been working my whole big butt off for them and prioritizing that company over my family, my friends and pretty much everything else in my life, they have the nerve to tell me that my job performance is “slipping.” WHAT???!!! That is crazy. Anyone that knows me knows how committed I was to that job. They obviously do not value me at all. So, I’m out and I feel really great about it!

In the UK a birth mother can’t make the final decision to give her baby up for adoption until the baby is 6 weeks old and a baby can’t usually be officially adopted before 10 weeks old. Often the process will take much longer and often there is a need for the baby to go into foster care first. It can be harder to find adoptive parents for babies of some minority background and those with known disabilities/ health problems or an increased risk of disability or health problems becoming apparent as they grow and develop are less likely to be adopted. Who will care for the unadopted babies and if there is a steady stream of newborns the likelihood of older children or even toddlers being adopted would become minuscule, and they’re already pretty low. As fertility treatments become more successful and available I also imagine the number of couples looking to adopt a baby is likely to decrease in the future anyway. Adoption is not really an effective argument against abortion, and of course this doesn’t even take into account the risks to the birth mother of carrying a pregnancy to term, childbirth can still lead to complications and even death and then there are the long term effects which can still arise even following a fairly straightforward birth.

@MyNewBearTotoro
Adoption is not really an effective argument against abortion

Absolutely it is not in a general sense.

But for an individual woman faced with an unplanned pregnancy, it is a valid choice for her to make & to expect support from us & society to do. So, imho adoption should remain on the table as a possible choice for women as well as abortion or keeping the baby.

@StockTakeFucks
Agree. Disgruntled former employees tend to have an axe to grind.

The hard part is that one side will say they are a whistleblower being punished by the company with trumped up disciplinary actions, while the other will say they are terrible employees fired for cause who are trying to get revenge. Sometimes it’s hard to really see what is going on when there is so much propaganda out there.

I suppose we should be glad she didn’t bomb the clinic....

@bbgxd

@DoctorAllcome

I really hope this will make sense. If it doesn't I do apologise, I'm down with a cold and English is my second language. Most things make sense in my head...but only in my head.

I don't know about USA, but the UK foster care system is crumbling. Too many children,not enough people or funds. They are struggling.

That number of children is not static,neither is their age. They will grow. Then if you add at least a third (let's say all the other mothers changed their mind and decided to raise the baby) of the yearly number of abortion to that,the number raises exponentially. Even if most get adopted, there will still be some left behind for various reasons (disability,an ethnicity that is not "popular",not enough adopters,incompatibility etc) and they end up in the system as well. Don't forget that the process can take months and even years sometimes, so none of them will be newborns anyway. Not long before they're over the desirable age for adoption as well. And then you get a new wave of kids ending up in care due to abuse,neglect,loss of parents etc and a new wave of babies being put up for adoption. Year after year

How long do you think the system will cope? How many children would be acceptable to fall through the cracks and be left in the system?

It really doesn't matter how many people are willing to adopt newborns, there will never be enough to not have a roll on effect on both the number of children already in care AND in increasing that number of children.

That's what bugs me about the adoption argument.

Yes, I do agree with you DoctorAllcone that adoption should be offered as an option to any woman facing an unwanted pregnancy and any woman who goes with that choice should be fully supported. I hope I didn’t make it sound like I am against the idea of adoption or that an abortion is preferable, in all cases of pregnancy I think what is paramount is the choice and wellbeing of the pregnant woman (and following, but not before, a live birth the wellbeing of the baby).

But as a general alternative offered up by those who wish to make abortions harder or even impossible to obtain abortions adoption is absolutely not a reasonable solution or alternative to the number of women seeking out abortions.

But for an individual woman faced with an unplanned pregnancy, it is a valid choice for her to make & to expect support from us & society to do. So, imho adoption should remain on the table as a possible choice for women as well as abortion or keeping the baby.

That I agree with,it's all part of being pro choice.

A civilised society takes care of its people. It's everyone's problem if women can't or aren't allowed to access safe, legal abortions. It's a shame on everyone if women die trying to end an unwanted pregnancy.

Of course a bunch of cells containing genetic material is not a member of that society. It's a bunch of cells. Ok, presupposing it's a person, we still have to decide who is more of a person.

So... this, question to all the anti abortion proponents...

There's a burning building, in one room is a crying, frightened toddler, and a massive container of frozen embryos -1000s of them. You can save one. Which is it? I hope it's the metal container containing the human genetic material!

The hard part is that one side will say they are a whistleblower being punished by the company with trumped up disciplinary actions, while the other will say they are terrible employees fired for cause who are trying to get revenge. Sometimes it’s hard to really see what is going on when there is so much propaganda out there.

Tbh I think the truth is somewhere towards the second side, with a side dish of manipulation from others rather than it all coming from her(including her alleged experience). Not because it's "my side" but because of the timeline and the radical switch from "PP are great,I'm employer of the year, I give it my all,anger at pro life groups and getting threats" to "pro life group is great, I'm their spokesperson,they never threatened us it's all so unbelievably amazing, PP is vile and killing babies "

Mum2386 Haha support 😂 I’m sure if they read this thread and your views they wouldn’t seek support off you, also..if you’d support your children then support women by not giving your pathetic views on a forum we’re women terminate everyday for various reasons and are probably reading this. I’m sure you’ve made this thread just for attention

Btw when I talk about adoption, it's when it's offered as the only option if you don't want a baby,not adoption in general.

I feel like the abortion time limit should be lowered, but to take away the decision all together, that’s just ludicrous, it would just mean an influx of kids who’s needs aren’t being met because realistically who’s going to birth a child than not keep it?

because realistically who’s going to birth a child than not keep it?

Assuming you mean then...

My birth mother. There were 4 other babies left around the same time as me. When it came to being adopted, me and another were in the running because of our looks, close enough to the adoptive parents that we would pass. I "won" because my birth mother was more "worthy". She was a 16 yo high school girl, "who didn't know any better,bless her". The other mother was a 20 yo "educated woman" going to university so she should've known better. That's wha it came down to,

Yay me!

@StockTakeFucks. They may well be superfluous but hey, it’s the internet and you’re putting yourself out there to counteract this woman-hating nonsense.

I doubt your kids will find support from you op. There is no point lying because given how you are on here there is no doubt you will make your opinion known in such a way that your daughter wouldn’t be able to come to you for support even if she did you would make her feel like crap. People like you are such liars.

Thanks @Saucery .

Sometimes I dread it being all me,me,me. I still do it because..
It kinda feels a lot of the times that people that are anti abortions or would like them restricted talk about the "after" with an idealistic,imaginary and often utopian view.

It's easy to combat abortion,it's legal,it's happening, it makes people uncomfortable etc.
But the effects of banning it often aren't as tangible, especially in GB. They have no experience of it, directly or indirectly. The lack of choice hasn't really affected them in any way,or their loved ones. Those effects are easy to ignore and combat.

So I've told my story(and others) again and again for years under various usernames because I've lived it, I've seen what happens. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad in a rich,western country, but I sure as hell wouldn't be willing to risk it or wait and see if there's an acceptable level of"bad" first.

I can’t see the system coping tbh, even with the best will in the world. And the psychological trauma of forcing women to carry to term and give birth...well, I don’t need to go into that. Adoption is not the answer, not at all.

@StockTakeFucks sorry for what you've been through, and thank you so much for being brave enough to share your experiences for the sake of other women, in the face of some extremely unsympathetic and disingenuous posters.

@Mum2386
Ha nice try! I would support my children in whatever way they needed to be supported, as I said it’s my personal view. Next question?

OK then, my follow-up question is why you would support your own children but not other women in exactly the same position?

You say it's not your responsibility to help these women, They got themselves in to this position etc. Then it is not your responsibility to save the fetuses.

Maybe they blocked it out which is understandable.

Maybe you shouldn't arm chair psychoanalyse other women and dismiss their feelings and experiences just because it doesn't suit your narrative or it's not what you think they should feel.

Do we really have to go through this again?