Unplanned - Abortion Film **Trigger Warning** Title edited by MNHQ sensitive content*

[Mum2386]

Hi,
Last night I watched a film called Unplanned, which is based on a true story of a lady working within an abortion clinic called ‘Planned Parenthood’. The film itself brought me to tears on many occasions and it’s made me feel very uncomfortable surrounding abortion. I had an unplanned pregnancy with my third child but knew abortion wasn’t an option for me. I am quite shocked by the amount of abortions that still take place within our society. Does anyone else feel this way? I know we all have different views but i just wondered what other people’s thoughts were on this very sensitive topic.

My opinion is that if you don't want an abortion then don't have one.It's not difficult.

@InglouriousBasterd

If your heart bleeds too much, you can of course step up to adopt the living ones in care who were born into abusive and neglectful homes.

Quite.

do we take the view that sex can result in a pregnancy and the parents should take responsibility in the event that happens

I see you’ve said parents. In reality it’s the womans choice as it’s her that takes all the risk. Luckily when I had an unplanned pregnancy dh and I agreed right away but if we hadn’t It’s me who had to go through another pregnancy, it’s me who had to risk my health, so my view holds far more weight than his. Your posts imply there is something inherently immoral about abortions, why does it matter how many are performed? Why shouldn’t it be used as a safety net? There’s really nothing wrong with abortion, it’s just a medical procedure. Some women might have complicated feelings or feel sad about having one but lots feel nothing but relief. It’s not all doom and gloom.

Surely the reason why the UK has the highest rate of abortions has a lot to do withe fact that we are a modern, respectful, relatively pro-women country where women are allowed to make the choice over whether or not they have a baby at that particular time?

I don't think anyone is going to come on here and say that there isn't still work to be done on sex education and empowering girls/women, and educating boys/men, to make sensible choices regards sex and contraception. There is also still work to be done as regards childcare, the division of labour within families, and income, all of which may allow some more women to carry a pregnancy they might alternative chose to terminate because of finances or family issues.

But at the end of the day, you can't sit there and say that anyone who wishes to engage in sex should always be prepared to potentially have a baby. That's ludicrous. Unplanned pregnancies happen for dozens of reasons. Even planned, or vaguely planned, pregnancies might suddenly become something that a woman or a family can no longer go through with.

You can feel morally uncomfortable with abortion and you don't have to have one. Don't question another woman's right to have one.

FrancisCrawford - Yes as in women use it as a safety net because they know if they choose not to use contraception and fall pregnant then the option to terminate is there for them. Would they then be more responsible for their birth control choices knowing that safety net wasn’t there for them to fall back on.

I’m not saying women should be forced to give birth but women and men should take the responsibility that if they have sex then there is a risk of pregnancy, most contraceptives will prevent pregnancies, we know there are contraceptive failures but what percentage of those make up for abortions and what make up for those that don’t use contraception and rely on termination as their back up, that’s the part that is morally not right for me and the removal of the fetus from the mother’s body via medically or surgical.

You are perfectly within your rights to be anti abortion for you. I totally get that it is something that some women would not wish to go through themselves and would choose to have the baby instead of an abortion. Nobody should ever feel forced into having an abortion and I believe society should offer the support and welfare so that no one ever feels that they have no choice other than abortion in the event of an unplanned pregnancy.

But, I 100% support the choice to abort and do not ever wish to see that choice taken away.

So go ahead and live your life - but don't go around trying to force your views on others. Just be thankful that you are not in a situation where you have to make that choice.

What do you want women to do resort to going to back alley abolitionists? Having dirty unsterlised instruments used.

Mum2386 What is your alternative suggestion? You've problems with the 'morality' of abortions. What is the alternative? Reopening state care homes? Forcing women to keep babies they can't afford or can't look after? What is your suggestion? I'd love to hear it.

@Rachelover60 elective abortions aren’t actually legal in England and Wales, they just aren’t prosecuted.

I am not shocked the Britain has such a high rate of abortion, medical care in this country is patchy at best, many women struggle to access contraception and medical advice. I know that people have their own opinions about how much the government should spend on people’s personal problems, but I am sure that we can all agree that the government needs to churn money into contraceptive and sexual health services as a matter of public policy.

And OP you do know abortions were carried out before this legal 'safety net' you speak of? Illegal, dangerous backstreet abortions. What's what you want to go back to?

The UK isn’t even in the top ten of highest abortion rates.

I can’t imagine particularly caring what another woman does with her uterus. Not your body, not your business.

The embryo is not considered a fetus until the 11th week of pregnancy. That heartbeat is not a 'sign of life' and most abortions occur before the 8th week. There is no fetus or baby and no pain felt so the foundation of the OPs argument is flawed.

Abortion is a very personal subject, and should be available to all. It's more than whether or not to carry on with a pregnancy, it's who will care for, pay for that life and how it affects the quality of life for those already here.

The view is 'how could anyone have an abortion' is so narrow minded and this argument is pointless until the pro lifers are willing to acknowledge the wider picture.

worldpopulationreview.com/countries/abortion-rates-by-country/

For reference.

You can’t ban abortion. You can only ban safe abortion.

As early as possible, as late as necessary.

I've always been pro-choice but felt I would never be able to have an abortion myself. However, since then I've had to experiences that have completely changed my mind.

The first was finding out that my much-wanted pregnancy was non-viable but because I live in a country where abortion is illegal I couldn't do anything about it and instead had to wait over a month for my baby to die inside me. It was a pain I can't describe.

The second was actually having a baby and discovering how all-consuming and impossibly hard it is even when you are in a loving, stable and supportive relationship with the baby's father. If I found myself pregnant outside of that kind of relationship, I'm not sure I would be able to continue with a pregnancy.

Make your own choice, but don't dictate others, and don't be so sure of what your choices would be if you were actually facing that situation.

I had a abortion, due to failed contraception, I am already a mother of 2 and aborted my 3rd, it's something I will never ever let myself go through again, so this idea of women using it as a safety net and reusing to use contraception because they can just pop along and have an abortion is wrong, it's not as easy as rocking up at the clinic and having it done, it's lots of appointments, lots of paperwork, lots of questions. It's not a nice experience, it's painful and extremely emotional, it's also a hard decision to live with, even though I know I did the right thing for me and my family, It has been hard for me to get over. I don't see why any woman would want to let themselves go through it again.

So you don't want an abortion. That's great for you. You really don't need to waste quite so much time thinking about other people's sex lives, (and indeed rapes), bodies, reproductive systems and choices though.
No amount of your handwringing over watching a film you didn't like is going to change anyone else's life. You can't come here and shame people into keeping a baby they can't afford/house/look after.

Rededucator - As I said above for men and women to take better care of their contraceptive choices, maybe if they did and abortion wasn’t an option, then they would?
I have never once said women shouldn’t have abortions because that is the choice of the individual woman, I was stating my opinion on it and asked how people felt about it in general, as i don’t know how others feel about it because it’s not talked about and I stated my reasons why ‘I’ couldn’t have an abortion myself because how I felt about it.

You can feel morally uncomfortable with abortion as much as you want. My Dad feels morally uncomfortable with abortions but he wishes and will campaign (we live in NI) for women to have the right to choose agency over their bodies.

His right to feel uncomfortable has no place within his daughters and granddaughters right to their reproductive healthcare. You do know that women in NI have unprotected sex, contraception failure just the same as other women. There isn't a huge number of babies waiting to be adopted. These women travel, until recently pay for healthcare, travel, accommodation, don't get aftercare from their own GPs etc. Travelling with a friend/relative to somewhere unfamiliar, paying money they can ill afford, lying to work and family members about where and why they are heading away on a "work trip", "family emergency" - that'll test your moral compunction, maybe you'd prefer that?

How would you police people 'taking more care of their contraceptive choices'?

The myth of the feckless woman having sex when she wants with no care about pregnancy because ‘there’s always abortion’ is alive and well, I see.
She doesn’t exist in anywhere near the numbers the anti-abortionists claim and even if she did, so what? Her choice. Everyone else should neb the fuck out.

I don’t understand the view from those against abortion for all women. I mean, they do realise that they don’t have to have one if they don’t want to but by taking the choice away they are forcing everyone to follow their opinion only. Be against it for yourself but fucking hell stop trying to police other women. As for the film, I don’t know it and haven’t seen it but abortion isn’t a lovely thing, it’s not nice to go through and I’m sure it’s upsetting so a film wouldn’t be anything but upsetting if based on abortion, but it’s better than the alternative and it’s why everyone can choose for themselves if it’s an option or not.

Planned Parenthood is here in the US.
Unlike the U.K., contraception is not free from the NHS. I pay $30 a month for bc pills. So, I am a bit amused at UK women saying that they struggle to get contraception when it is free?!
Also, I think the cost of abortions in the U.K. is also free? Except NI women who have to travel to rest of U.K. to get one.

So, in the US it’s a different environment. Contraception is not free. Abortions are expensive. Many women cannot access contraception. I read somewhere that over half of abortions are due to contraception failure. They even have studies showing that some women are immune to bc pills and all hormonal bc.

Then if you do end up with an unplanned pregnancy, often abortion is later than 8wks in the US because you have to come up with thousands of dollars to pay for an abortion. That takes time.

Hysterectomy isn’t a lovely thing either. Or a hip replacement, tooth extraction, corneal implant, bowel resection, varicose vein stripping, diathermy after severe tearing during birth.......

But no one is putting a handwringing, judgemental, if only these women had lived their lives according to MY moral code! thread up about those procedures are they. Funny, that.