anyone awake? Please chat with me for an hour

[WLmum]

Hello, is anyone awake and willing to chat with me about anything at all.
I'm waiting for daybreak, and then for school drop off time, so I can go and be with my truly amazing, so loved dm while she passes away. I am heartbroken. Been awake most of the night wondering if she's going to hold on long enough for me to with her.

Anyone else up? Tell me what you're up for and help me pass the time. Please.

We are all here with you until the end OP

I’ve read through the thread and wanted to offer another hand hold. I hope being with her tonight brings you some comfort. Xx

All love to you and your Mum op. I have been where you are now. I came home on my Mum’s last night to sleep, but I asked her not to go anywhere until I came back in the morning. When I arrived back with her, she was further away, but still alive. She died about an hour later, I really feel she had been waiting .
It is the hardest thing I have ever done but I am so glad I was there, holding her and talking to her. Your Mum is so loved, she will be surrounded by love and peace now.

Wishing you love and strength as you sit with your Mum. I had to do the same for my beloved son when he lost his life to cancer aged 18 and the following year with my mum, also from cancer.

It is truly desperate to watch those you love suffer. Both my son and my mum were surrounded by love and it gives me comfort that I was with them as they left this world. I was able to tell them both how much I loved them.

For my son I bought him into this world and had to give him the best death I could.

My mum bought me in to this world and I sat with her until her end.

Terribly terribly hard times and I'm so sorry you are having to say goodbye to your mum. I hope peace comes to her soon xx

Still holding your hand, OP x

Thinking of you op, I lost my mum 12th August, it's heartbreaking, glad you've got family around you, big deep breaths. Sending u hugs xx

I’m so sorry 💐

You do all sound really lovely x

I hope you have a peaceful night.

The ‘waiting’ is incredibly hard. You want ‘this’ to be over, but you don’t want them to go. You just want it all not to have happened.

Life can be cruel & unfair, but whilst the pain is awful- it’s because we loved and were loved so much. It’s the price we pay for love. 💕

Big hugs for you all x

Baaaa

Staying tonight sounds like a great decision. Cuddle her and love her. Like you always have, and always will. We are all right here, sending enormous strength and loving thoughts to you 💖

Id you want to post I'm here, if you don't then I wish both you and your DM a peaceful night.

It’s so hard letting go of the ones we love

@minmooch that’s beautiful

Sorry pressed send to soon

I’m in awe of you & your strength.

I'm still here & thinking of you & your mum @WLmum

Haven't been on here much in recent days, and found some of the posts hard to read, as it's very raw with my dad at the moment.

This from Chipping is spot on:

The ‘waiting’ is incredibly hard. You want ‘this’ to be over, but you don’t want them to go. You just want it all not to have happened.

You're at a very tough point just now 😢 sending you love & strength.

Hi OP,

I hope you got some sleep there with your mum.

Something lovely and close in bad times. Cling on to the positives, you can do it .

How are you this morning lovely?

minmooch I'm so sorry you went through that. I can't even begin to imagine how unbearable that was. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and your strength. Much love.

chipping

Dear @WLmum, I have been where you are just over 2 years ago with my adored mum, she was 64. Cancer is a bastard.

I'm an only child and we brought my beautiful mum back to her home toward the end as that's what she wanted. I never left her side, only to go to the loo, but I knew she needed me there. Before she was so ill we sat in the lounge one day, opposite couches and she says "this is when I like it, just you and me" so I knew deep down she didn't want me to leave her.

If you feel your wonder mum needs space then you are right to give it to her, I think you just know, deep down.

It sounds like you are a close family, use your siblings for support and vice versa as the aftermath is a lonely place (my DF did not cope with the illness or my beautiful mums passing), and I cried for someone to take just a little bit from me to ease the burden.

I am sending you all of my love. In some ways I feel lucky that I was able to let my mum know how deeply I loved her and that I will love her until I see her again. Some people don't get that luxury.

I hope it is peaceful when the time comes and that those she loved in life will be there to hold her hand, I'm sure you all will be xx

I've been there with an uncle whose diagnosis was very aggressive - it sounds so heartless but it was a relief when his suffering ended. We cried and hugged but then didn't know what to do with ourselves, as it was the middle of the night and we couldn't start making any arrangements. So we made tea which we were able to giggle about as it's used to fix everything in our family .

WLMum I've nothing sensible to add except to send love and strength to you, your Mum and family. You all sound wonderful and full of love. And to everyone who has been through this .

WLMum I've been thinking about you all day.

minmooch i have no words, I am so sorry.

Thank you lovelies. I suspect it may be tonight. I'll sleep in here again tonight. No idea if the end will wake me or not. I'm getting increasingly sad for her too now - this is not what she would have wanted - us all on pause just watching and waiting, and going through all this pain.

Pain is terrible to watch. My Mum had been in pain and then was put on a morphine driver so she was knocked out, but I still worried about her being in pain but unable to express it. I feel for you op, I hope your Mum gently drifts away, no pain, no fear, just love.