Hands up, how many of us were smacked as children?

[Brownwool]

Just doing my own survey here. For me it was just normal. A bloody good smacking certainly taught us what not to do. It was more about my parents being unable to control themselves. And now things have changed so much. I just wonder how many MNrs were routinely smacked?

I think all that hitting someone teaches is to get your way/get someone to agree with you then you use violence.

I cannot see how if someone annoyed them they were able to control themselves but with their own children they resorted to assault to get the message across.

I know I resented being hit. It didn’t do me any harm in the long run but it did terrible harm to any form of relationship with my mother. I knew when I was very little I couldn’t trust her.

Oliversmumsarmy my parents only smacked their own children, but both my mum and dad remember being smacked by neighbors, other kids parents etc. Again I think this was a 'times change' thing (60s Vs 80s).

I remember my mum smacking my arm once. I remember being incredibly upset and a bit scared.

I don't hold it against my mum at all but I can honestly say, despite having two toddlers who drive me absolutely nuts at times, I have never ever even in the heat of the moment even considered smacking them. It just hasn't entered my head.

Im 44 and I got smacked a few times. When I was a teenager I was mouthing off to my mum and she went to grab me, i moved and one of her rings caught my eye and I ended up with a black eye! My mum was horrified as that was not her intention! My dad smacked me a handful of times and mum a few times. I never felt as though I was being abused! My friends parents smacked them too so I guess people felt it was normal.

Never smacked. Very rarely shouted at by either parent. Never smacked any of my children either. Im a 90s baby, I think snacking was on it way out socially by then ?

Never actually smacked but my mum used to threaten me with it. The worst bit was the humiliating way she would threaten it. The last threat was when I was about 14. I told her, if she ever laid a hand on me, I would leave and she could stop considering me to be her daughter. She never said it again.

I am so anti-smacking. It makes me physically angry. Reading some of these comments makes my blood run cold.

To all the comments saying about parents only hitting whilst calm and collected. In my head, that’s so cold and calculating. I could never calmly think about hurting my DD. I could never hit her in anger either. DH was hit as a child with hands, slippers, spoons... Before DD was born, I warned him that if he or his parents ever smacked her, they would never see her again.

I hate that word 'smacked.' It's hitting someone, usually someone smaller than you because you can't control your temper. I grew up in the 70s and early 80s. My mother kept a piece of bamboo cane by her chair and would hit our legs with it. She also used to hit me across the head with her hand. My dad is one of those weak, blustering bullies. He would hit me so hard I'd have red handprints on my arms and legs. I can still remember how much it hurt. I was definitely the scapegoat middle child, Dsis older and Dsis younger. I got hit the most. I was terrified of my parents. My mother could be a nasty, spiteful bitch and I thought all mums were like this until I went to a friends house. It has affected me. I am still full of anger and resentment and it's taken a lot of counselling to get to this point. I never hit my kids, I don't understand how anyone can inflict violence on a small person and say its for their own good. People like my parents should never have had children, they didn't like them unless they were tiny biddable things. My dad is a frail old man now but I can't forgive him for how much he hurt and frightened me when I was a tiny scared child. I wasn't naughty. It was always for daring to express an opinion, trying to explain why I didn't like something, anything that disagreed with how they thought things should be. I'll never forgive them. Sorry, that went on a bit!

@thesuninsagittarius I hate the word too, like calling stealing "shoplifting". I remember a book against smacking written in the 1980s which observed "our language has developed a remarkable vocabulary to cover hitting children", before listing about twenty synonyms.

it was my DM who used to hit us. It was definitely due to her own frustration. One of my earliest memories was when I stood on dog poop and she hit me. I was only around 2 1/2. She took slippers to me and my sisters regularly, hit us on the head with a brush every time she aggressively brushed our hair. (i hate people touching my hair to this day). She took a belt to my sister because she came home 1 minute late. Regularly threatened us with the man in the van.

There is no excuse for hitting, its simply a parents own frustration and teaches a child fear and nothing else. I have made sure that I do not hit my own DC and walk away when I feel my temper rise..... my DM doesnt talk about her behaviour towards us but I would never leave my DC with her ever...

31 here. Smacked by both parents. Mums were "naughty" smacks for messing around near roads or climbing out my window (aged 6...) . Dads were because he didnt like my attitude or behaviour (i.e not constantly in agreement with him....) during my teenage years and we had a few physical alterations 15-17. It was awful. Both sets of my grandparents hated smacking but one grandma would threaten you with a slipper. So I'm not sure why my parents felt the need to smack us.

Never have or will punish my DC with violence. I resent my father particularly for his "smacking" and its had a huge effect on our relationship as adults.

It makes me pretty sad, all these posters saying they were only smacked when they 'deserved' it. No child deserves to be subject to violence.

Yep for really naughty or dangerous behaviour.Im 39 and I totally love and respect my parents,I don't judge them for it and i had a fabulous childhood

Yep in the 70's when it was I think the norm. Dad would do it and mum would be downstairs then come up later to say "It served you right".

Much later I asked her if she knew exactly how we were hit and she admitted that she did not know. I told her I would be kicked upstairs, head banged against bookcase, my brother would be kicked in stomach....and he was actually not a violent thug! It made me rather bitter and I lost respect for them for a while.

Whoops! I should say that I am ok and from age of 14 there was no hitting (I guess I would have hit back!). I had an ok relationship with them afterwards but at the time ...

I'm 43, was smacked or hit not out of frustration but to maintain discipline and, control and fear of god. Childhood was safe, and felt cared for, also don't consider the smacking as abuse but I also don't have the close bond and love that my siblings have with mum and dad. I do love, care and respect them

I feel guilt and Shame that I also replicated my parents form of discipline, but it was more out of frustration. But there is no excuse, hurting your children just makes no sense. My children don't have any resentment towards, but recall there childhood as happy and loving, however I do feel guilt.

Yes

Whoops! I should say that I am ok and from age of 14 there was no hitting (I guess I would have hit back

So they only hit you when you were too small to retaliate

I'm stunned how many posters think it was ok to hit a child. I don't think there is any justification for hitting another person ever.