Hands up, how many of us were smacked as children?

[Brownwool]

Just doing my own survey here. For me it was just normal. A bloody good smacking certainly taught us what not to do. It was more about my parents being unable to control themselves. And now things have changed so much. I just wonder how many MNrs were routinely smacked?

Yes by dad and his parents but not mum or her parents. Hasn't had a lasting effect. I don't hit my kids though.

Not routinely and not by my Mum.

My Dad thumped me a few times. Pretty grim. He also shouted a lot.

It stopped in my early teens. My brothers got it too but not my, much younger, sister.

Yes, and only when I had been warned and I deserved it. Like playing in road. It wasn’t a loss of control, it was discipline. I’m not scarred.

Yes

Regularly. Smacked my dd, not so often. I can't imagine that her dd has ever been smacked. Better ways have been found.

We have a rule in our house - no one hits anyone, whether child or adult. We are a violence free house.
I wish I’d grown up in a house with that rule.

Not often, so far as l remember, but once my mother hit me and l had a very obvious hand shaped bruise on my arm for days. Nobody said a thing.

I was smacked, sometimes with a wooden spoon, in the early 90s.

I remember when smacking became not the done thing and I was made to sit on the stairs instead. I hated it, I used to dream of running away and instead of making me sorry for what I had done it made me angry and resentful.

The threat of the wooden spoon made me behave more than the bloody 'naughty step'.

I don't smack my DC. I have done in the past, like when my son tried to run out in the road, but my DC are 12 and 13. Smacking wouldn't work when they're both taller and stronger than me! I read a parenting book, recommend on here (2013 ish) and never smacked again. I learnt better tools to manage my sons behaviour.

thats not to say I don't ever see DC misbehaving and think, if I'm totally honest a smack would sort them out. If my dc were ever rude to me, like how some younger DC of my friends are to them I would most likely smack them.

Battered/punched with and without instruments, dragged by the hair on my head and threatened regularly. I was a very submissive child that was easily bullied.

Yep and I think it's awful and would never do it to my children. I'm certain it was because my parents can't handle their emotions and are bad at talking about it. I can't imagine ever hitting anyone I love. I'd certainly never hit my parents so why would I hit my children?

Not very often, maybe a handful of times. The only times I remember I'd done something dangerous (like putting my toddler brother on my lap and then sledging downstairs in the laundry tub )

I don't feel damaged by it/was never scared of my parents but it doesn't mean i'd do it now...times have moved on!

Yes, by hand, slipper, and the wooden stick that my mum used to use to hook the clothes out of the twin tub washing machine - until it snapped on my backside. Oh I was happy that day....!

I'm mid 50's smacked at home, and school and anywhere else grown ups managed activities.
it was the done thing, glad it's stopped now, and luckily apart from the abuse at school I have no other issues.

Only once or twice by my mother. But she was very emotionally abusive, frustrated with her life and blamed her kids

Yep, terrified me.

Horrible thing to do to a child.

Wrong.

Yes very occasionally when I got hysterical. It shocked me enough to calm me down apparently.

Twice ever.

Once for leaving my nanas garden with two of my younger cousins and crossing the train tracks with them into the wasteland behind them

Once for being a total shit as a teenager.

Both my mum. She can have quite a temper. My dad never laid a finger on me (or anyone else that I'm aware of for that matter).

I have never and will never smack my child.

A bloody good smacking certainly taught us what not to do. being hit/smacked taught me to be a quiet child, to do anything to avoid incurring my M's anger and so avoid being smacked by her and then again by my DF when he got home. I was a quite, timid and scared child, other adults knew and did nothing. At least my DF admitted he was wrong and apologised to me in later years.
Did it harm me and my sibling? Yes it did.

Loads. I don’t think my mum regrets it, and would probably minimise it if I asked her about it. It has made me have no self confidence as a child or as an adult. I would have a better job and more friends now if I hadn’t been smacked as I would be more confident and less anxious. My mum would be firmly in the “did no harm” camp but she doesn’t know the whole story of the sadness I felt then and still do now. I wonder how many people feel the same.

I don’t smack my children. They are cheeky fuckers sometimes but I’m hoping that as they grow up they will have the ability to challenge others rather than be a doormat like me.

Yes I was, but only if I was really naughty and it was never done to actually hurt but more to shock. I've never hit my DC, I can't expect them to not go around hitting others if it's ok for me to hit them.

Yep. Deserved it from my dad and learned from it. My mother, the less said the better.

I did, but not excessively. I remember running past my mum clutching my bum - and can laught about it. I wouldn’t condone it now though and think there’s a fine line that can be crossed. Verbal discipline and clear consequences is best in my opinion but is easier said than done and requires some skill - I think not being able to smack but also not really knowing how to implement an alternative has left a lot of parents in a bit of a lurch.

Yes me. Never by my dad but maybe a few times by my mum.
I don't feel scarred or traumatised at all. I drove her mad occasionally and in context she was an amazing mother all round who have many stresses on her.

There were loads more really awful things to be traumatised by in my childhood.

I totally get though proper violent out of control parent would be different kettle of fish and I do not snack my dc.

Yes by my mum. No by my dad.
Says a lot about my relationships with each of them now

I only remember being smacked once by my dad, but my mum says she smacked me now than once, but I can't remember that. I don't think it affected me at all. I had a healthy respect for not making my dad angry. I tried hard not to smack my kids, but must admit I've lost it occasionally, when really angry. Not proud of it, but can definitely count the total of times on one hand, maybe 3 times in total, always on the bum, and I have three children, so once each. They love me to bits (now adults) and come to me with their problems, we're all very close, so I don't think it affected our relationship at all. However, I felt awful about each time, and would rather not have lost my temper.