Can we have a confessions thread

[Mother87]

DH bought THE most god-awful 'marl' effect grey denim jeans recently... and wore them THREE times in one week as he LOVED them that much so of course they were put in the outside dustbin just before bin-day as soon as he was away for one night

And yes it was me not some random who knocked over the black electric box thingy by the front of the house

These are quite innocent confessions I know😇

When my exH would come home stinking drunk I’d take money from his wallet (notes) and the next day he’d think he’d lost them because he was drunk.

It wasn't really a delivery van who backed into your car, it was me who backed it into a wall. Sorry DH.

@CoffeeAndFags

He sounds awful and hopefully you're happy now

Dominos did not charge me for the 3 pizzas, 3 drinks and 3 sides I ordered over the phone on Saturday night and I haven't called them since to pay.

Asda home delivery gave me 4 packets of chicken i hadnt paid for. not told them

I told my DP my then 1 year old DD pulled the radiator off the wall. It was actually me when I pulled myself up from sitting on the floor. He looked incredulous when I told him as she was still quite small and slight but he bought it

Go you coffee and fags.

Go you

May or may not have scratched our brand new work surface - and then blamed it on DH putting his work tool bag down on it. He even bought me an Emma Bridgewater chopping board to say sorry. IM GOING TO HELLLLLL.

I may have replaced the snickers ice creams I bought on Saturday for me and my boyfriend to enjoy last night because I single handedly ate Saturdays pack

It was me that reported the neighbour to SS after watching her have her screaming 8 year old up the street at midnight. Chasing her and screaming 'you little c*'. It was midnight and an access visit, the child lives with their father.

I watched the SS person arrive and have noted that the child hasn't returned. I hope the neighbour is never allowed unsupervised access again.

*chasing her child.

I reversed my 2 week old car (very slowly) into another car. Barely a bump and couldn't see any damage so didn't say anything. DH noticed a scratch a week later and I blamed it on him borrowing my car and parking it in the hospital car park when he was visiting his dad. I said it had most likely happened there as I hadn't had any bumps.

I also didn't tell him when I received a £20K payout for a PPI claim I made (on my solely owned credit card). I knew he'd spend the money mostly on himself if he knew about it, so I kept it in a separate account and spent it on me and our DDs over the next few years.

Coffeeandfags, you are my new hero.

It was me who reported you to the police for sending pornographic pictures supposedly of my DB’s erect penis to various of his female female relatives - and providing the police with my phone for the duration of their investigation which proved they were sent from your phone. We knew it wasn’t what you were claiming as DB had more taste than to wear the clothes visible in the pictures and didn’t own gold sovereign rings that were also visible!

It was also me who reported to your employers (a local infants school) after you were issued a police caution for malicious communications and distribution of pornographic material - it was my professional responsibility to report it whether I had wanted to on a personal level or not! Best part of 15 years later and you still have no idea how they found out about it leading to you being sacked! Blood is far thicker than water whatever you think!

I had a bump against a kerb and needed to replace a tyre. I knew they should be equally worn so replaced both front tyres at a different tyre place to what we normally use. Didn't tell DH. He now buys this brand all the time because they wear so well and I got so many thousand more miles out if them. The man in our tyre place said I must be a careful driver. Obviously I'm not.

I made really good tea and coffee all the time without being asked, and my mother used to say how clearly she had me under control due to her expert parenting.
She had no idea that I was happy to do it, as every time I did, I spat in it.
At least 4 times a day, more on weekends.
From age 10 to when I left at 16.
Not even sorry cos she was a bitch/narc/abuser

Good for you, coffee and fags

BiBiBirdie glad you escaped abusive Dm . and hope you found happier times with lovely people now

Coffee and fags glad you escaped abusive partner , hope you & Dc are finding happier times

I stole an Xbox One from Microsoft. I'd spent >5 hours in total, over 2 sessions, trying to get them to understand that it was just the power adapter that was faulty. It was ridiculous how crap they were; ignoring what I was saying and blindly following their script.

Eventually I got the point across, I thought, and was sent a prepaid shipping label to send the faulty adapter back under warranty, which I did. In the meantime we'd purchased a replacement adapter with plans to sell it on eBay when the one from Microsoft finally arrived.

The new power adapter arrived after a few weeks and we forgot about selling the spare because it got chucked in a cupboard.

Then a couple of months later a new Xbox One (with no power lead ) arrived with an a letter inside the box, apologising for it having taken so long??!

I reported the error to Microsoft and was told to expect a prepaid shipping kit for sending it back. That never arrived and I never mentioned it again.

After about 6 months (when it was clear they weren't going to ask for it back) we sold our console and started using the new one (with the extra power adapter we had handy!)

This was all a couple of years ago now. Still feel guilty, even though Microsoft are not exactly hard up...

@midsummabreak I did thank you, and have had DH and his huge, loving Irish family for over twenty years.

BiBiBirdie that is so wonderful, and as it should be

Coffeeandfags, I salute you!
I only wish that I could have done similar to my exh but liquidised prawns and milk injected into soft furnishings? Genius!

It was me who cut up your work uniform shirts then chucked them in the bin along with your football memorabilia.

I let down your tyres when I knew you had gone away for a weekend with your slut.

And let down your mates tyres when you agreed to stay out night clubbing - that was the same night you stayed on the night bus as I had bolted the front door. You never understood how angry you made me

It still makes me grin now my shenanigans

Things I have learnt from this thread -

Most of you can’t drive properly and I’m never accepting any food or drink made out of sight by any of you!