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Original poster

Would you judge this parent?

293 replies

Sparrowlegs248 · 17/06/2019 16:34

If a parent turned up at a school event, such as sports day, nativity etc, dressed in untidy/dirty work clothes. Pre school or early primary age children. Parent is self employed, tradesperson. Not filthy but obviously less clean and tidy than an office worker.

OP posts:
Logan2014 · 18/06/2019 18:07

Not at all I had to attend my son's reception class open evening in my sweaty NHS nurses uniform after a hard day's shift hair untidy an me slightly deshevelled an looking ruff but hey I turned up!

skyblu · 18/06/2019 18:09

Err...no, I wouldn’t judge!
And how weird to ask?! Don’t think any decent human (who understands about working hard) would...

AlexaAmbidextra · 18/06/2019 18:10

I think the opposite - you are judging them for not going when you think they should. Maybe they don't really want to go? Is it any of your business? Should they go just to satisfy you?

Ffs! Some people would start a fight in a paper bag. 🙄

TigerTooth · 18/06/2019 18:10

No, I wouldn’t have a problem with that at all. Why? Who would?

rwalker · 18/06/2019 18:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TheWashingMachine · 18/06/2019 18:15

I would not think anything, my DH who has quite a high powered professional job regularly gets offered meals by soup kitchens near his work as he is always in grubby-looking, holey, clothes but actually he is very clean and a great dad.

jo3009 · 18/06/2019 18:15

You obviously are judging them. Why on earth should it matter if they are in work clothes to see their child!? The child is happy whatever the parent is wearing. You sound very stuck up OP.

Bossinger · 18/06/2019 18:16

No

Magmatic80 · 18/06/2019 18:16

I’d be impressed actually as the parent has clearly made an effort to make it, and either come straight from work, or popped out on a break especially.

jo3009 · 18/06/2019 18:16

Well said rwalker

CorBlimeyGovenor · 18/06/2019 18:17

If they're that worried, surely they could bring a carrier bag of clothes with them and get changed in the school toilets? It would take a couple of minutes.

Amibeingdaft81 · 18/06/2019 18:20

Ridiculous question

Amibeingdaft81 · 18/06/2019 18:22

I would not think anything, my DH who has quite a high powered professional job regularly gets offered meals by soup kitchens near his work as he is always in grubby-looking, holey, clothes but actually he is very clean and a great dad.

Sorry but this stuck out

Your husband is employed in a fairly senior professional job and he is regularly presumed to be homeless on his walk to work?

Presumably his job doesn’t have any interaction with clients??

CorBlimeyGovenor · 18/06/2019 18:22

No, I wouldn't judge them. But I would judge someone who verbally abused someone on a forum and made assumptions about them without even bothering to read the post and the reason for the question.

S1naidSucks · 18/06/2019 18:22

I would tell him that his absence is going to be judged, if he’s a father and I tell people he couldn’t come because he didn’t want to wear his work clothes.

And FFS people RTFFT

Amibeingdaft81 · 18/06/2019 18:25

I would not think anything, my DH who has quite a high powered professional job regularly gets offered meals by soup kitchens near his work as he is always in grubby-looking, holey, clothes but actually he is very clean and a great dad.

And does beg the question why doesn’t he clean / mend / replace his clothes? Grubby?

EarlGreyOfTwinings · 18/06/2019 18:25

No one bats an eyelid when parents (usually the dad) turns up in dirty work clothes. I don't think anyone cares!

ClaireScot · 18/06/2019 18:28

Not at all!

DoAllMeerkatsComeFromRussia · 18/06/2019 18:32

I think it's nice for parents to turn up like this. It shows how much they care. The ones I judged were the ones who wore pyjamas and slippers
to drop the kids off. There was a small group started doing that when mine were at primary and for some unknown reason it started to catch on- until the head quite rightly put her foot down. Turning up in work clothes shows your child the importance of working for a living. Who is more impressive- the parent who dragged themselves away from daytime TV, or the parent who has plastered half a ceiling and will be going back after the concert to finish it off, and yet still made time for something that was so important to their child?
I'm guessing the parent may feel a little inadequate/inferior. Are manual jobs less common among parents at your school?

Amibeingdaft81 · 18/06/2019 18:35

I wouldn’t judge in the slightest
Nor would I patronisingly think “good on you for coming”

I suppose if I thought anything it would be to wonder what trade he was in and whether I could get his number if needed!

I might also wonder if his child was a bit embarrassed, simply because I recall how utterly embarrassed I was when my father once turned up looking like a mad scientist (suited and booted by very stressful job!)

Deafdonkey · 18/06/2019 18:37

@IntoValhalla 😂 did he look as sexy as that sounds?

@lilypotter he wasn't much of a mechanic if he had oil all over his hands.

vincettenoir · 18/06/2019 18:37

No.

Scotland32 · 18/06/2019 18:48

Wow. Assuming you are the one who is making the judgement (obviously it is), I’m glad I don’t know you!

JaneEB · 18/06/2019 19:04

We have our own business and have turned up and the school to pick up the grandkids in quite a state before now. We often run cables, they can be underground or in messy offices, sometimes you get seriously filthy, and cabling is a messy job at the best of times.

Would you rather they went home and got changed but were then seriously late to pick up the kids?

Indie139 · 18/06/2019 19:05

No