Would you judge this parent?

[Sparrowlegs248]

If a parent turned up at a school event, such as sports day, nativity etc, dressed in untidy/dirty work clothes. Pre school or early primary age children. Parent is self employed, tradesperson. Not filthy but obviously less clean and tidy than an office worker.

@Ragwort where is that thread please?

Every morning I pass a woman walking her DC to school, her clothes and sense of style is ridiculously outrageous (to my way of thinking), she dyes her hair a different colour every day, her clothes are fashion extreme she just seems to be ‘look at meeeeee’, at least it gives me a laugh every morning.

What other kinds of people do you judge solely by their looks? Also, you laugh at her every morning? What a delight you must be.

Do you never judge anyone Pump? If not then I genuinely admire your integrity because I know it is not kind to judge people, I worked for over 15 years in the fashion industry and found it sad that (some) people were utterly obsessed in their appearance and nothing else mattered. I do judge that, I find it very sad and shallow.

Unless someone was covered in really obvious dirt or smelled, it wouldn't even cross my mind to notice how clean and tidy they were! It just doesn't register with me. Maybe because I'm naturally scruffy myself though!

I do judge the woman I saw feeding her small baby crisps earlier though. Especially as baby was on its back in its pram.

No, you are describing my dad! I was simply grateful he turned up (they in real life I'm not sure he attended any school events

I'm a mechanic and I just want to say that I do feel judged a bit and stared at when I collect Dd2 and/or attend school plays etc. I would usually prefer to go home and tidy up before an actual event but if I couldn't then I would still go.
I just wanted to say that people do tend to look. (or maybe I just feel like they do)

I do judge people, yes. I judge people who brag about how they laugh at someone’s looks every day. Do you allow your children to be unkind about others because of what they’re wearing/their haircuts?

Also the smirking about the woman who wanted a new dress for her kid’s sports day is just so unkind, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to look well turned out (or even appropriate) for meeting your kid’s teacher. I know you’re above that, but for some people these situations are a nightmare if you don’t know how to play it and you want to make sure you don’t get it wrong.

MrsRhettButler, if I saw you, I’d probably be doing a double take too. But only because I’d be delighted to see another woman that is doing a ‘traditionally male’ Job. I’d say the other lookers are feeling similarly.

Btw Nottalotta, you’re very welcome. 😁

Not at all.

I couldn't give a shiny shit what someone else is wearing.

No, not in the slightest.

No, I'm a teacher and I'd be pleased for your child that his/her parent was there.

No but I'd think you were a bit of a tw*t to be honest. HRTFT but hope this is a reverse.

I think anyone that comments on a thread without reading it is a twat.

There's a parent at our school who came ro a concert with 3 pairs of handcuffs and what could have been a baton attached to his trousers - he'd changed his work top but not bottoms. He got a few looks until someone explained he was just a security guard

Why would anyone be judged because they have a job and love the children? Seems an ideal bloke.

S1naidSucks I expect you're right as I don't think I've ever looked twice at a male tradesperson in dirty clothes before!
I do know that my (male) colleagues and I do all find it embarrassing as we are always so dirty and oil is horrible to get out, it makes you very aware that you're dirtier than everyone else.

This thread has bought back a lovely memory for me of a primary school play.
My mum had made it clear that I shouldn’t expect my dad to turn up, because he had to work and looking out at the audience and spotting him, in dirty work clothes (they probably had holes in).
If the person worrying about going is a parent, then I don’t think Yabu for wanting them to support there child.

I would judge the person judging them! A caring parent taking time out of their day to watch their child - awesome however you are dressed. All the children get to see a caring role model as well as a wider variety of parent - all children need to know that not all daddies wear suits etc as well as knowing that trades are options for their futures too.
Great role modelling of come as you are.
Bravo to that parent.

Maybe they rushed from work? Don't judge.

I do know that my (male) colleagues and I do all find it embarrassing as we are always so dirty and oil is horrible to get out, it makes you very aware that you're dirtier than everyone else.

If it’s any consolation, I’m a dog sitter and you may look slightly dirtier, but I can guarantee I smell worse. 😁

S1naidSucks

My DH was taken aside by a class teacher once for “causing a bit of a stir” amongst the mums in the playground by regularly picking up DSs from school in a wetsuit. He’d go straight to school from the beach where he was teaching sailing. I think the response of the school was less judgemental and more amused.and the mums apparently were happily entertained.

Tell the reticent parent to do it for the kids. Nobody will care except the child who misses out if they don’t go.

No, how dare you judge that person. My husband is a self employed joiner and last week rushed away from work to be at my 5 year olds sports day. The look on my sons face seeing his dad would far outweigh anyone like you who turned their nose up. Oh and by the way the kids think my husband in his work van is way cooler than any man in a suit and ask him loads of questions. I am actually so angry at this post! How dare anybody make anyone feel unwelcome, the fact they are there at all speaks volumes.