Hilarious old sayings you never hear anymore.

[FurCoatNoSnickers]

I’ve started this thread having had the most hilarious exchange with an old man and his carer whilst getting my morning coffee.

“Give it some welly”
“ looks like 6 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag” 😂
“If there’s a rotten potato in the pot I’ll get it”
“Knock ‘em bandy”

I’ve never heard any of them and they need reviving 🤣🤣

Please share yours that might be new to me also. I haven’t stopped laughing thinking I’d him.

Though I says it as shouldn't.

Eg: "That cake I baked was delicious, though I says it as shouldn't"

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
Black as Newgate (Newgate = old prison in London)
The mind boggles.
Fluff for brains.

What's that got to do with Clyde navigation? My mother used to say this when she thought something was irrelevant

“It’s a greedy bugger who’d take two sniffs of that” - my gran waxing lyrical about stinky farts.

I say "Bob's your uncle" all the time and follow it with "Fanny's your aunt". My children find it very annoying

Canadian ones here:
'That's a helluva note' (about something bad)
'Isn't that about a bitch?!' (same thing)

My Grandmother used to say 'Good God 'a Me!' as an expression of surprise or shock.

“Heed ya wheesht” - stop asking and wait (also granny).

Don't stand there like one o'clock half struck!
He/she's mean as cat's shit. 🥴

Stop piss farting about (dithering)
Piss wet through (wet)

My old granddad used to say "there and back to see how far it is" when we asked were we where going. Or "bubboth" I often wondered if bubboth was an actual place

"She's all Fur coat and no knickers" to describe someone who thought they were above everyone else!

6 of one and half a dozen of the other - To describe similar things or choices

Sitting there like Piffy on a rock bun

I can't wait to use "waiting like tripe for thrippance" saying in future conversations!

Better than a poke in the eye with a blunt ferret.

Pretty to watch
My granddad of anything done well (esp a snooker shot).

My dh says"oh my giddy aunt!" 😁

My grandma used to say

She’s the kind of woman who’d leave her pegs on the line

Also miss Wotcha! as a greeting and starting sentences with ‘Ere

You're in and out like a fart in a colander

(For someone who can't make up their mind, or when we were kids and in the back garden playing, then out the front on our bikes, then back in again to play upstairs, etc etc)

It's like Mary Ann Street in here, for when it's particularly messy (old Cardiff saying, Mary Anne Street was a notorious slum area).

You're like a potato sack tied in the middle
Jesus Mary, St Joseph and the bloody donkey
You're like a wee delph doll with a clay arse
Yer Ma's yer Da and your Da's yer Ma

What's for dinner?
Stewed bugs and onions.

Sheffield ones:
Owt for nowt
Like chucking a chip downt wicker arches ( horrible sex one)
Put wood in 'ole ( close door)
Also yes to : were you born in a barn, well ill go t' foot of our stairs

My grannie sagely advised me to "keep your hand on your ha'penny" when men are trying it on

And when something went wrong that was my own fault "well hell slap it intae ye" (meaning you were warned and did it anyway)

“Where there’s no sense, there’s no feeling”.

“Might as well hang for a sheep than a lamb” - if you’re going to do something wrong and get caught, you might as well do something really wrong.

I’ll give you what for.

Used when a child was whinging and meant they’d better stop it or there would be more trouble.

If I asked my dad where he was goi g, he would often say “I’m off for a bath on the roof.”
Absolutely no idea why.

He's like a taxi with it's doors wide open, for somebody with sticky out ears.