Advice Clinic - Slatterns welcome

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Do you have problems? Is your life truly ridiculous, are you ridiculous? Please step inside our fully staffed advice clinic and we will cure all your ills. We have a clap nurse standing by for more intimate problems, don't be shy.

Yes it's ok Frown I died of eating crack in my sticky toffee pudding but naked resurrected me with her small prick.

Help me!!! I am supposed to be getting ready to go somewhere and I am still arguing with stupid, or should I say Goady Fuckers.

Whatever, I need to dry my hair!! Somebody stop me!

What would Saint Dangly do? (this can be my new mantra!)

Oh I'll go over and take a look but not sure how much use I'd be

Dangly Say a prayer for them and sprinkle some holy water on them before you leave the thread. People hate to be forgiven!

Spritz your hair with some holy water and it will dry all by itself.

Thank you Caroline superb I shall do just that! It'll break the spell!

Frown be careful, witchcraft draws you in!

St. DT GET OFF THE FAT THREAD
DRY YOUR HAIR

There, sorted.

Many thanks naked you've saved the day!

I'm off out now thanks for snapping me out of the spellz.

I feel a business idea forming, merchandise and holy pilgrimages to visit places St DT have been. Obviously the working mans club where she performs will be a shrine. The rugby balls are holy relics. We could be very, very rich soon.

Having the pox would be like stigmata marks.

From now on, whenever i feel myself lured into aibu, i shall read Naked's summary upthread and remind myself not to go there.

My Russian Poisoner interrupted my listening this morning by laughing out loud at something on the internet. Such an unusual sound when we are alone, it startled the dog who dashed out of the front door thinking we had visitors.
She came back with one ear up (that's her 'FFS' expression) she might have been impressed if she'd known it was a photo of a dogs arse that had Jesus or Robert Powell on it.
Consequently we have spent too long looking at her arse to see if it has any famous faces.
We actually laughed together without visitors

Anyway..I cried out 'There's the Blessed Dangly Tassles!'.
And they both looked at me with one ear up, it went so quiet you could hear the wireless.
Thank you, Blessed Dangly, another miracle.

Photo

I've just tried to take a picture of my dogs arse, to see if the blessed DT is featured. It is surprising difficult, she keeps spinning round, clamping her tail down. I shall persevere.

Dog I am staggered we have overlooked this moneymaking scheme . Nobody could deny our right to sell sacred Dangly relics, since religious belief is a protected characteristic.

BTW in America The Pussy Church of Modern Witchcraft has been able to register as a proper religion and pays no tax, I believe.

Also, never never never go to AIBU.

Lad, praise be!

Lad !!!!

And we can hire out St Dangly of Tassles for weddings, christenings & confirmations etc.........ata price of course.

OMG Tracy we'll be rich!

Saint Dangly, can you see yourself in here?

My dog's arse has more than a passing resemblance to Vivienne Westwood (Border Terrier AKA Ginger Ninja) but she has some sixth sense so whenever I've tried to take a photo she sits down. Fucking spoilsport.
Dog I'm kinda getting Robert Plant vibes or The Sorceress from HeMan.
Do you look like Robert Plant, Blessed DT?
He was very slinky-hipped and shrieky in his prime.
The Sorceress was a lazy, bossy, know-it-all (that will be inscribed on my headstone), she got everyone to do the work and had a sparkly slanket, very Thigh.

!!! Maybe it's Babs from Pans People!!! She was/is married to Jesus so it's a sign we are all just two dogs arses from being related.

Well thank god there are some pictures of dogs’ arseholes here to calm me down.

Fucking stupid fat thread.

This is a photo opportunity lidocat can get involved with.

I can definitely see a face in the bum hole of TL's cat. 2 eyes, a nose and a beard!
St. Dangly, do you have a beard?

Well I'm not posting my cat's bum hole, plus she wouldn't pose as it's beneath her!
But have Scary Misty, will that do?