My advanced but exhausting daughter

[Kimmibastin]

I have known my daughter is different from an early age. She has insisted on holding her own bottle from 10 weeks, cut her first 2 teeth at 9 weeks....the list goes on. She is my 2nd born (my son is 3yrs 6mnths) Anyways she is now 20 months can count beyond 10, dresses and undresess herself, is toilet training and has an extremely wide vocab and understanding. I believe she is gifted. I have never felt this way about my son as always felt he has developed within the normal milestones but my daughter is just something different! Before u think im blowing her trumpet im not. I am a nursery teacher with 10+ years experience and know she is advanced. Tbh its a bloody pain in the arse! She doesn't sleep well,dosnt sit still and is very demanding.help!what shall I do?

Someone needs to tell schools to stop all baseline assessments when children enter school just ask parents about their teething habits and when they held a bottle!

Enjoy your child at the stage she is at now. Nobody can predict how she will develop or at what pace.

Sounds like a normal toddler to me - they all do things at different ages. They are all exhausting especially if you have two little ones demanding your attention. I’m sure you don’t need us to suggest activities for you.

Why would a nursery teacher with 10+ years experience not know what to do with a fidgety child?

DS1 was exactly the same as your daughter. He is in Y1 and is very bright but is also on the SEN register with suspected ASD.

My friends daughter was the same, advanced for her milestones. Her speech and vocabulary were insane at 18 months and she could talk to anyone about anything ( full conversations).
She was a crap sleeper too.
She’s four now and there is no difference between her and my little one.
At that age yes they might hit their milestones early but you can’t tell if they are “gifted”. Babies all do things at diff ages and probably compared to your first she is doing stuff earlier.
Enjoy her, don’t worry about it, give it a few years when she hits school and see if they think she is. Chances are she will be at the same point as everyone else then

You are blowing her trumpet. This thread is daft. Cutting teeth? What?

You don’t have to do anything - she sounds like an active tot.

My son was holding his bottle at the same age, and dressed and undressed himself around 2 years, and while I'd say he's bright, he's not exceptional. Even categorizing him in that small way makes me feel distinctly uncomfortable. He's an individual, as are all kids.

My son was considered SEN when he was 4, mostly around speech and language stuff. He got his doctorate last year.

You can't predict. Your daughter sounds delightful and talented - not sure about gifted (I also work in an area that requires an in depth knowledge of child development). Enjoy her, play with her, submerge her in books, give her opportunities to play outside and let her risk assess,

Teeth have nothing to do with intelligence. What a weird concept.

Nothing you have said really reads as your DD being highly intelligent, maybe more to do with an independent personality. DS3 was a very independent baby, he wanted to do everything for himself from an early age, walked at 10 months old (DS1 at 9 months old). BLW was great with him, he was using a spoon from around 10 months and refused my help with a lot of things.

Just enjoy her and stop trying to read into things too much.

I couldn't read and write properly until age 9 - 10. I have an IQ of 125.

My df said his first words at age 3. Walked at 2. He's now fluent in reading, writing and speaking three languages.

Dc1 could speak clearly in a 7 word sentence by age 2. He could do 1:1 correspondence age 14 months. Dc2's said first word at 9 months - other than mama, dada. He could dress and undress himself before age of 2. There's a number of other things they could both do well before the expected age, and they're now both upper ability at school. Dc1 very good at sport, Dc2 very good social skills.

Point is, you are clutching at straws.

I have no idea if mine could hold a bottle under three months because they were breastfed. Cutting teeth isn't a sign of advancement - their levels of intelligence do not influence how quickly their teeth come through! The same for potty training - that is a hormone that kicks in, not intelligence. My (proven!) gifted eight year old still has toilet issues. Counting beyond ten is good but not particularly special. She sounds bright, but not exceptionally.

Ha ha ha 🙄

One of mine was weaned (under HV advice) at 4 months. After about 15 spoonfuls she was clearly dissatisfied with the service and took the spoon and started shovelling the food in herself. Two of mine were chatting fluently by about 18 months and would astound other parents with their conversation and knowledge. The one who did very little- not even babbling at 18 months has gone on to be the most academic at primary school. Different skills, different people. If it is any help the early eater has continued to be good with cutlery

She sounds very similar to my DD2, apart from the bottle holding as she was breastfed. She was however feeding herself entirely independently with a knife/fork/spoon at 8 months.
She’s nearly 4 now and very bright. However I don’t think she’s as bright as my DD1 who is now 5 but didn’t dress herself until she was nearly 4 and would still let me feed her if I was willing (I’m not!)

If she doesnt sleep well, doesnt sit still and is demanding they dealing with these issues other than that you dknt need to do anything

I have a relative who is a paediatric specialist and she said parents who have a boy first and then a girl often think the girl is advanced, and that parents who have a girl first then a boy often think the boy is delayed. Girls tend to hit milestones earlier when young.

Your DD sounds like my two DDs, slightly ahead at these early stages but even out with their peers by 3/4 years old.

Op I think your getting some harsh responses when your just excited about your child.
I don't think you would really know until they hit school age.
My ds2 is in year 4 and has a reading age of 14 year old and they get his maths work from year 6.
I wouldn't say he's gifted. Some dc just click at things others don't.
Obviously if she starts splitting the atom then ask again

tough crowd

I agree. One of my three is academically adept, let’s say, but he was far and away the one who took the longest to hit those baby/toddler milestones. He didn’t talk until he was very nearly three.

You are getting ahead of yourself. It’s normal to be proud and excited about your baby’s learning but try to keep your feet on the ground. Be happy that your daughter is doing well. Don’t assume she’s a cut above the rest quite yet.

None of it suggests she is advanced.

My first DC didn’t walk till 18 months, but could speak a multitude of words clearly in English and Italian (ExHs first language is Italian) my second DC walked at 9 months but barely spoke a word till around 2 years old.

I never thought either of them was delayed or gifted. All DC develop at different rates to each other.

I may amazed at the number of babies on here that fed themselves at a very young age! I have an image of a baby in a dinner suit holding a knife and fork at the table eating steak 🤣👶🏼🍽

Isn’t she reading? Mine was recognising words from around nine months. True. And as for ‘they even out’, she’s 37 now and still noticeably cleverer than most. As with yours, OP, she’s been hard work sometimes but always wonderfully rewarding. Make the radical readjustments to your mindset that are necessary and enjoy.

Plus the very obvious smug, superior digs about not knowing if their babies could hold a bottle at an exceptionally young age as they were breast fed

I noted the digs about breastfeeding too and they made me chuckle.
If you’re not in it, you can’t win it.

Why is she exhausting?