Corny or downright crap jokes anyone ? I shall begin.

[IndigoSpritz]

Yesterday morning, I went out to buy some batteries. It was a power trip.

Why are there no aspirin in the jungle?

Because parrots eat 'em all.

It said that my new password had to have at least eight characters, so I used Snow White and the seven dwarves.

Why do giraffes have long necks?

They have smelly feet

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser

Well if it's maths jokes you like...

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.

What did the buffalo say when his kid went to college?

Bison

Knock Knock.
Who's there
Cows go.
Cows go who
No they don't. Cows go Moo.

I don't watch darts. I just don't see the point.

I'll get my coat

Did you hear about those fellahs that robbed that perfume shop.
They were scent to jail

Latest news. A ship carrying red paint has crashed into a ship carrying blue paint. The crew is marooned*

*Joke courtesy of The Two Ronnies Sketchbook c1981.

How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One.
We are very efficient and we have no sense of humour.

Jan Böhmermann

Why did the French chef wish to die?

He lost the huile d'olive.

Enjoy.

What does the baby lamb want to be when he grows up.
A baaaaber

Doctor Doctor. I feel as though I'm invisible.
Who said that.

DSs current favourite:

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Europe
Europe who?
How rude!

How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One
We are very efficient and we have no sense of humour

But I thought that it was lots of Germans that were needed to change a lightbulb, because many Hans make light work!

What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
You can't wash your hands in a buffalo.

Helps if you're black country
Thank you TahaniAlJamil

Oh I was going to say the constipated mathematician one.

I think someone's already said why did the baker have dirty hands? Because he kneaded a poo. [santa]

@ Toldmywrath. Its a bit early for Santa isn't it. What's he doing there.

Another poo joke sorry peeps.

Knock knock.
Who's there
I dunnup
I dunnup who.

You'll never guess who I saw yesterday.
Everyone I looked at.

Knock knock.
Who's there
Boo.
Boo who.
Don't cry its only me

Exactly, and I've just travelled back in time to prove it
Knock, knock
... Who's there?
The Doctor
... Doctor Who?

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 8 9.

However, 6's fear was unfounded; 7 8 9 because it wanted 3 square meals a day

Placemarking due to unforseen name change.

@Awwlookatmybabyspider sorry about the Santa, happy new year lol.