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Original poster

do You play fight with your dh?

174 replies

CocoDeMoll · 12/05/2019 21:15

We haven’t for ages but did tonight. Is it weird or just something couples do? We used to massively before kids btw so nothing out of the usual.

OP posts:
Mummaofmytribe · 13/05/2019 02:52

Bruising? And you say you didn't like your child seeing it? That's not play fighting is it??

PyongyangKipperbang · 13/05/2019 02:53

No because I am a grown up

NottonightJosepheen · 13/05/2019 06:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Applesbananaspears · 13/05/2019 06:28

Never, why would anyone over the age of 5 do that? I’ve never heard of it as an adult activity

BoomZahramay · 13/05/2019 06:46

We play fight sometimes, usually with the kids. It does not involve bruises, punches, kicking, or any actual fighting. It's more like pillow fights, tickling, jumping on the bed (kids only), DH throwing us over his shoulder (kids think it's hilarious when he does this to me). DH does not have to win because of his ego.

ArabellaDoreenFig · 13/05/2019 07:13

There are some massive alarm bells in your posts OP-
The fact your DH likes to win because of his ego, and he doesn’t think women should get a free pass - what does that even mean??

Any man who pushes someone around who is smaller than him around is an arsehole. And dead arms and bruises are not the signs of a good relationship.

Me and my DH have very childish sense of humours, and spend a lot of time laughing and having fun together but ‘playfighting’ is not done in my house, it always seems quite disrespectful to me.

FamilyOfAliens · 13/05/2019 07:18

I’m a family support worker and I’m working with a family where the parents do this.

Needless to say, the children’s behaviour in school reflects what they are seeing normalised at home.

Original poster
CocoDeMoll · 13/05/2019 07:18

Honestly I think I was just being super sensitive yesterday and this morning he was concerned for how I was and even kissed my arm. He is just one of those competitive men, forever getting into fights (with other men not women!!) before we had children (not anymore at all though) . Just an extra dose of testosterone and competitiveness on his genes Grin.

For those that recognise me things are actually really good at the moment and he’s working hard and doing more parenting too.

OP posts:
Original poster
CocoDeMoll · 13/05/2019 07:20

family I can understand that but this is not what our dc see at home at all apart from last night and I made it clear I didn’t like them seeing it.

OP posts:
FamilyOfAliens · 13/05/2019 07:23

That’s exactly what these parents say.

You can’t control how your children react to what they see and hear. Why not find another hobby that doesn’t have the potential to give them skewed ideas about power and control in relationships?

CodenameVillanelle · 13/05/2019 07:24

FFS people posting about tickle fights and whatever - that's not what the OP is describing. Maybe read her posts before getting defensive of your own relationship and normalising what the OP and her children are experiencing?

Rubberduckies · 13/05/2019 07:29

We playfight but not dead arms or wrestling (Dh saves that for his brother) we tickle, whip each other with tea towels, pin each other down, cold hands/cold items down each other's backs.... why can't adults play with each other?!

Rubberduckies · 13/05/2019 07:30

My point being that playfighting with tickling etc is pretty normal. Dead arms and bruises? Not so much.

MashedSpud · 13/05/2019 07:33

No.

We’ll lightly slap each other’s bottoms or grab the other for a cuddle but not in an aggressive way. Definitely no bruising.

Ikeameatballs · 13/05/2019 07:34

We sometimes tickle and wrestle each other. No one gets hurt though.

Shoxfordian · 13/05/2019 07:35

You shouldn't end up with physical injuries, it isn't ok

Doesn't sound light hearted or trivial at all

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 07:53

AnyFucker

Eh not fuckwits, just answering the original question from the OP. Not everyone advance detached every post they read. Infact, I think we are advised against it Hmm

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 07:53

Searches, not detached

MonkeyToesOfDoom · 13/05/2019 08:03

He is just one of those competitive men, forever getting into fights (with other men not women!!)

The term for those men is "Cunt"
As in,
"Dave likes to fight because he's an aggressive brainless cunt"

Happy to help.

Wolfiefan · 13/05/2019 08:16

Monkey speaks truth.
He’s a twat. Stop trying to justify his unacceptable behaviour.

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 08:19

OP my DP is a competitive man when it comes to sport or games, but he doesn't go around fighting with other men. He can actually control himself and not hurt me, or fight with people in the street, and he comes from a very rough background, where it's the norm for people to scrap over nothing.

BrownEnvelopeWoman · 13/05/2019 08:22

We often assume dramatic Kung fu style stances towards each other upon entering the room, accompanied by suitably scary hi-yahs.
But we have teenagers in the house so have to maintain a safe distance from each other of at least 4ft exclusion zone, any closer and we are 'yuck, embarrassing, so inappropriate'

Catchingbentcoppers · 13/05/2019 08:27

No I hate playfighting.

The school I work in now doesn't allow playfighting because every bloody time, someone gets hurt and starts crying.

Catchingbentcoppers · 13/05/2019 08:30

He is just one of those competitive men, forever getting into fights (with other men not women!!)

I don't know anyone like this. It's not normal.

PlaygroupDilema · 13/05/2019 08:35

Occasionally DP and I play wrestle/tickle a bit. I wouldn't say we play "fight".

You're actually trying to hurt one another which is too far. Your DP sounds a bit like my dad. He was a keen play fighter.. a.k.a abusive wanker which resulted in someone he "loves" always getting hurt.