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Original poster

I'm really not a very nice person

496 replies

notaniceperson71 · 09/05/2019 19:06

So on the surface I am a very nice person, respectable middle-aged lady - kind to everyone, the only person at work to hold the door open for the cleaners, judge people that are rude to waiting staff etc etc

But internally I really am not a very nice person and think the most awful things, I openly admit that most of these are jealousy so not a very nice trait I know for example:-

My close friend's DH has just lost his job, I am being supportive but in reality I am secretly pleased, they might have to downsize from their five bed detached house and cut back on their multiple luxury holidays.

I have a crush on a married colleague (I am also married) and if I had the opportunity to shag him with 100% assurances that no one would ever find out then I would!

One of the ladies in our friendship group has recently started to gain wait and is not ageing well (she was always the slim, pretty one) this pleases me.

I love it when my colleague makes mistakes at work, it makes me look good.

My cat shits in next door's garden, I actively encourage this.

Is anyone else secretly evil or am I just a cunt in disguise?

OP posts:
ddl1 · 10/05/2019 18:45

Well, we all have evil thoughts; it depends what one does with them! I am a very non-violent person in my actions, and am a supporter of Amnesty International and strong opponent of the death penalty. However, I do sometimes daydream of applying the Mikado's suggestion of 'something lingering with boiling oil in it' to people who commit a variety of offences from campaigning against vaccination to reminding me of my birthday (I am a birthday-phobic!) to being Donald Trump!

I would, however, advise you against encouraging your cat to shit in neighbours' gardens (though seriously how do you encourage a cat to do anything?!), most of all because a nasty neighbour might take it out on the cat in some way.

Mummadeeze · 10/05/2019 18:45

This thread is upsetting. I can believe that you are horrible but I can’t believe quite how many people are saying they are the same. Am going to have to try really hard not to be paranoid now when I tell my friends good news. Judging by this, a percentage of them are wishing me bad thoughts and failure inside. V depressing. I really hope I have managed to find like minded, genuinely nice friends and that I have seen through people like you.

Vivianebrezilletbrooks · 10/05/2019 18:46

I agree that anyone who doesn't admit to having a dark side is the ones you need to be careful of.

I admit that I have a very sarcastic snidey side.

Oh and those people who say that it's all down to 'not being in a loving relationship' etc well I'm sure there are those whom are that are the same. I actually like that side of me and I'd prefer to be like I am than have someone turn me into Mary Poppins.

whittingtonmum · 10/05/2019 18:48

Why are you friends with people you wish ill? God I really hope my friends aren't like that. That would be terrible and I certainly wouldn't want to be around them. Nasty.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 10/05/2019 18:52

I think you fit right in here, OP. Have you posted on the royal baby name threads yet? Still time.

YourEggnogIsBetterThanMine · 10/05/2019 18:58

There are a few people I dislike even though they have never said or done anything unpleasant to me, I can just sense they aren't nice. Cunts in disguise, as you say. I have a cunty gremlin in my brain that thinks bad thoughts but I can usually override it and I know what my true feelings are but some people are just pure cunty gremlin. If you are genuinely enjoying the misery of others then you are the latter but I'd guess they are just fleeting negative thoughts that you don't actually believe.

Bluntness100 · 10/05/2019 19:07

I agree that anyone who doesn't admit to having a dark side is the ones you need to be careful of

Sure, we all agree, not one person has posted that on here though have they? What's been posted is they don't feel gleeful when bad shit happens to their friends. Not people they don't like. Not their enemies,not acquaintances,,. But their friends. That's what the thread is about. Feeling chuffed when something bad happens to your friends.

And if you think that you need to watch out for people who say they don't feel pleased when something bad happens to their friends, then that's very sad indeed.

cherry2727 · 10/05/2019 19:08

I completely disagree with the posters who seem to favour you as you're "honest" about your thoughts!!! By declaring to strangers on an anonymous forum that you have such negative thoughts is not being honest ! Being honest about it is actually telling the people who are affected by your negative thoughts your true thoughts.

Why don't you start by telling your partner that you often fantasies about "shagging" your colleague and that the only thing stopping you is the fear of getting caught. Why don't you tell your friend who's husband has just lost his job that you're actually happy that they will be downsizing their 5 bedroom house and is in fact quite chuffed! THAT's being honest !!!! I mean , it's only thoughts right ?? Surely no one would be bothered by them!!!

And no I'm NOT perfect! I've met people who have hurt me deeply and people who are smug and sanctimonious whom I have most probably disliked and not want anything to do with! I haven't secretly wished any misfortune about them! I was bullied by a colleague at work badly and I wished he left the job or changed teams but not that he got fired ! It's human nature to wish bad on those who hurt you but not your friends and those who love you !

Middersweekly · 10/05/2019 19:09

I think the OP sounds pretty normal. I am more outwardly cunty than that, but only to people that have treated me with disrespect as I feel they deserve it and definitely not to dear friends. Everyone I meet starts on a level playing field (despite what anyone else says or thinks of them) and I treat everyone how I would wish to be treated. If you piss me off or treat me badly then that’s it for me! I’m harsh but fair.

handbagfettish · 10/05/2019 19:13

Do you know, I really admire you for telling the truth. I think we all assume everyone has a wonderful life apart from us sometimes (not the case when you scratch the surface). I genuinely wouldn't want anything bad to happy to any of any of my family or friends but I sure as hell would be jealous if any of them won the lottery (unless they cut me in!).

Sofagirl · 10/05/2019 19:14

@cherry2727

Absolutely agree. OP is not being honest but is using Mumsnet as a way of probably offloading her guilty conscience and trying to make out it’s acceptable normal behaviour

Oh karma can be a real bitch!

Go on OP

Be honest and open for once in your life and see where it gets you

Sofagirl · 10/05/2019 19:15

@middersweekly

At least your not being two faced and people know where they stand with you!

Original poster
notaniceperson71 · 10/05/2019 19:17

@whittingtonmum

Please tell me where I have said I wish my friends ill?

OP posts:
AFistfulofDolores1 · 10/05/2019 19:18

OP, I think you're simply more honest than most people.

cherry2727 · 10/05/2019 19:18

@Middersweekly you're clearly missing the op's point ! You're like this when people have disrespected you - perfectly normal!! She's like this just because.....

She talks about holding the door for the cleaners at work like she's ran a marathon for a charity ! If I were to explain that I was a nice person I surely wouldn't mention holding the door open for a cleaner as a nice attribute ! This does not define whether you're a nice person or not !Most people hold the doors for people regardless of their job title ! Op sounds like she has massive self esteem issues !!

Sofagirl · 10/05/2019 19:18

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pivotagain · 10/05/2019 19:22

Does everyone not do/think these things? Really?? I think it's very normal just not normal to voice it in the real world - then you sound bitter and sad. But no-one is hurt by your thoughts!!

ADropofReality · 10/05/2019 19:26

How very British. Can't have any tall poppies! Let's hope they fail, so we can all have a gloat!

Sofagirl · 10/05/2019 19:27

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ADropofReality · 10/05/2019 19:28

@notaniceperson

Please tell me where I have said I wish my friends ill?

The bit where you say you hope your friend has to downsize and not have a holiday is wishing her ill, or does it 'not count' because you don't have a 5-bed house?

CrazyAllAroundMe · 10/05/2019 19:30

I've a friend like you... She doesn't know we all know so you won't be fooling anyone either x I hope you go out of your way to find some happiness in life OP; jealousy will eat away at you forever otherwise.

Ilfie · 10/05/2019 19:34

You sound pretty normal to me!

Sofagirl · 10/05/2019 19:35

I really can’t stand these type of people

They usually live quite insipid lives with nothing going on hence other peoples joys grate at them and other peoples suffering seems exciting

Sad days

I have a single friend who almost wants me to break up with my fella so she doesn’t quite feel so lonely

But then she has rattled through a couple of husbands already!

Middersweekly · 10/05/2019 19:41

@cherry2727 the op did say the neighbours weren’t very nice so she encourages the cat to shit in their garden therefore I think my point stands. I do however believe a lot of people think the way OP thinks and she is therefore quite normal. People are envious by nature. I also know a lot of people who love taking the shine off others to focus it on themselves (Whilst these people would be in my memorised list of cunts) they are out there and they are plentiful!

CarolDanvers · 10/05/2019 19:41

You're talking absolute shite sofagirl and sound way more unpleasant than the OP. Just so you know.

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