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Original poster

Do you have problems? Would you like a solution?

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 15/04/2019 15:48

Please come into my advice clinic. All my agony aunts are both untrained and insane. We WILL help you.

OP posts:
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LovelyCocksReg · 18/04/2019 15:55

Here are a few cards.

LovelyCocksReg · 18/04/2019 16:01

FUMN

CarolinePooter · 18/04/2019 16:02

It's always handy to keep a few blank cards in stock. Thanks reg !

LadAlive · 18/04/2019 16:03

I would suggest 'Short & Curly' but mine are lonnnggg and straight.

DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 16:05

Lad there is another thing - we could sell pube combs for long ones!!

We could cobble them together out of twigs in the garden for low cost operation. Only when it's nice out though!

LovelyCocksReg · 18/04/2019 16:05

Well then mumsnet I suppose I’ll just go fuck myself then.

DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 16:07

Don't worry Reg this happened to me during our Anniversary the other day, I just went to sleep instead and it was fine!

LadAlive · 18/04/2019 16:16

S'ok Reg quickly eat a bag of pickled onion Monster Munch, your inner Thigh will be soothed back to not giving a fuck either way. Flowers

LadAlive · 18/04/2019 16:29

I have a comb Dangly it's the one I use for me pooch (She doesn't mind, I asked her, she just said 'Meh') but we could market them as new product for people who are more 'particular' than me and her.

Perming solutions too, with little plastic rollers, for people who are just looking to refresh their style.
'Is your Mons Pubis looking flat and forlorn? Try our Punani Perms! Add some youthful vigour to your Pants!

LadAlive · 18/04/2019 16:31

This brain-storming is how Apple come up with new products.
We'll be fucking rolling in it.

DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 16:32

Yes to perming solutions and tiny rollers!

What chemical is it! I think nail varnish remover would do! It's smells equally pongy!

DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 16:33

Imagine if we overtake Apple on the leaderboard!!

Or am I on about Strictly?

DogHairEverywhere · 18/04/2019 16:35

We could design a range of clothing where you could pull a few of the more colourful pubes through and have them on display. Shame to go the trouble of perming and colouring just to hide them away.

DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 16:39

Maybe a crotchless knickers range dog ?

Yes! Cheap Primani knickers flashed at the crotch with weapon of choice! Bingo! Exclusive lux pube display knickers at a premium price!

Now those would fly off the shelves!

LadAlive · 18/04/2019 16:39

No good asking me about chemicals DT I am a trained Scientist but I have no skills or qualifications, we'll have to wait until Naked's slept this morning's skinful off.

DogHairEverywhere · 18/04/2019 16:40

Thigh, I've finally worked out the Cat/Yusuf reference, i was hoping to stay under the radar, but you are too omniscient for me to hide my identity in such a clumsy manner.

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 18/04/2019 17:13

Fucking finally Dog was worried you were thick or something.

OP posts:
Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 18/04/2019 17:31

I need more, where's my Sudentenland? I need power. Just one measly country after being Leader for over 2 months. I expected to be in charge of the world by now.

OP posts:
DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 18:10

Well thigh we did have an American person yesterday, she may be back so that's a start and we had Danish for a time and that's almost the entire world isn't it?

2018SoFarSoGreat · 18/04/2019 18:18

Dangly if I am the American referred to I am back. But truth be told I am no more American than .... oh, any old American thing. I am large though, much larger now that I am a American(ish) than when I was just plain old Scottish. Hmm. Everything IS bigger in America. My backside and - well, truth be told - all my other bits are enormous. Perhaps I caught it in passing? In the air? Like cold germs but much fatter.

Oh. I also like to eat Danish. Pastries.

I find I am most eminently qualified to be here.

(now have to read back two pages to see what I missed whilst off being (Un)American and very busy and important like.

DogHairEverywhere · 18/04/2019 18:22

Didnt we have an Australian pineapple pop by?

DogHairEverywhere · 18/04/2019 18:25

Reg i think MN have fixed the picture problem. Where are the cards? I've got the doors open as its a nice evening, but the breeze keeps blowing my pube display all over the kitchen. I need to see the cards, so i know which pubes to save.

DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 18:54

HelloGreat !! Forgive me for mis-nationalising you! That's ok you are welcome whoever you are!

But the fact that you are Scottish means that we are covered for that part of the world at least! Then we did have iamdanish for a time - she gave me my machete! She called something about cheese now!

Maybe that's all we need for global domination in any case?

LovelyCocksReg · 18/04/2019 19:04

I hope they strike the right menacing tone.

Do you have problems? Would you like a solution?
DanglyTassles · 18/04/2019 19:04

dog pineapple was thigh all along! She showed us her user name history! She was also me for a while too! 🙄

I did love her as the grumpiest 🍍 though!