Is your life still shit? I can solve all your problems....forever.

[pineapplebryanbrown]

I'm a non medically trained self appointed internet nurse. As I am unfettered by knowledge or training I can help you to solve every problem you have. Step inside my lovely advice clinic which is staffed by myself and my team of kindly Agony Aunts.

I’m worried about the straying into royal baby names territory. It’s an a par with S&B, surely.

Just got an advert for a "premium wall mounted lockable letterbox" It could solve all your problems. lido

Are we getting each other's adverts? Let me know if you get any vehicle doggy smell remedies, they will be for me ;-)

This is my latest advert. Would anyone like a pattern?

Definitely illuminati sending coded signals (shiver)

Thigh reaches lots of low places. I'm very short

Yes getting and the adverts I see feature trousers for "average height" of 5' 6" !

What are they playing at?

The patterns just came back. This time I took the risk and clicked on them. Nothing. It’s not a link. Is this part of MNHQ’s plan to destabilise is?

But will try to ignore clothing adverts, after what happened in the last thread.

lido that is bloody odd.

I’m sitting here waiting for ‘shudders’ guests. Sadly I can’t pretend I’m out as I answered the phone... might cover myself with my slanket and try to pass myself off as sentient furniture!

🤗🤗🤗

Boo guests midnight!

I'm getting a lot of make up ads. It's like MN knows I look like shit, maybe it's seen me through my camera phone? But it doesn't seem to know I've been ill for 2 straight months and couldn't give one that I look like shit!

I also get a vacuum advert a lot. What are you trying to say, MN?? I already have one, it works fine I just don't use it. It makes a good coat rack.

On that subject i know this was said a while back but thank you thighland for being a place where it's ok that your iron is for weapon use only. Mine has never graced the surface of a piece of clothing but I do put clothes next to it in a sort of kidding myself I'll iron some of it sort of way.

My advert

Well the joke is on them. I'm not going to play put put golf nor take a career focused degree.

So weird!! Maybe it's some sort of psychological experiment, and by clicking it you passed the test! Or maybe it's the latest advertising method, it was all subliminal and you e probably subconsciously already bought the product...?

Thigh now that advert must be for me because I am very easily persuaded by adorable things and that is the cutest darn golf ball rabbit I've ever seen.

I wish I knew how to screenshot. I'm now getting wall art of what appears to be a young Queen Elizabeth wearing a plastic tiara and a neck full of cupcake tattoos.

Pooter my friend had this - I made her chocolate truffles for Christmas once and they squashed the box flat and pushed it through the letterbox. She thought someone had posted shit through her letterbox. Very festive!

Sorry this not pooter

No guests yet... (must still be in the restaurant)... but I do have adverts for bras!

Midnight the guests have not arrived? This is brilliant news. You must make the most of this opportunity. Turn your house into a Shrine to Thighland.
Take your clothes off and cover yourself in a slanket, turn the TV up to full volume, crunch Monster Munch into the carpets, adopt 23 rescue dogs, hang entrails from the doorways, order yourself a Fuckboy and when your guests arrive, insist they dress in clothing you knitted for them with the fur all the dogs have shed. Threaten to iron their cocks if they disobey

midnight Guests??? Guests??? This is not a good use of a Saturday! Hope they bring you nice stuff and bugger off fairly soon ;-)

Fuck me, there's a fucking emu eating my money!

Leave my Thighland yen alone, you fucking overgrown chicken bastard

oxygen I have one iron, an ironing press, two ironing boards and a mini ironing thingy you can put on the table. Not one have I used since last year.

I had this crazy idea that a bigger board would make the job quicker, but it's so heavy I can't lift it. So I bought the padded table thingy for emergency ironing. I didn't really use it because well, It's a horrible job. Fuckboy hasn't ironed since he retired, but I bought the ironing press device so as to tempt him with a gadget Oh, he really likes it and won't let ME use it because of a few burning incidents ;-) We had a few good weeks, lovely ironed bedding and everything. Inevitably, the novelty has now worn off. I rescue crumpled things from "the ironing pile" and we have slid back again. So we are very very thigh!

Pooter I once read on Facebook (wonderful invention for maximum time wasting) that only witches are capable of folding fitted sheets. Did OH fold yours after he ironed them? Hmmm? Do we have to burn him at the stake? Can we burn him at the stake anyway?

getting I have never tested your hypothesis as even at my craziest I have never ironed a fitted sheet. He is certainly incapable of putting one on the bed right first time, they should have arrows or something. He does take ages to iron a hankie, though, so maybe I should keep a close eye on him?