Do you ever look at someone and think I really want to give them a make over ? There’s a Mum I see on the school run, probably about 40

[Lardlizard]

Lovely slim body, and I thjnk she could really improve her look as she wears these baggy jeans
Awful trainers and fleeces and her hair is like a bush
I think even if she wanted to dress casually, she would look so so much better with some jeans that fitted well, some nice smart trainers, she’s. It not making the most of herself, somedays she clearly works as she will wear a skirt with heals and a fleece

I wouldn’t want to be so rude or ever say anything but I just think could sill dress just as causally, bit look so much better

I do this a bit, but only because of how amazing I found it when I figured out how to do clothes, skin, hair and make up (in my late thirties). The boost it gave me was just incredible and I didn't even realise how miserable I had been about never knowing what to wear. I thought I was above it, but I wasn't. I just want to give other people that feeling.

A work colleague said to the whole office "of course no-one dresses up to come here, we are all scruffy".

I pointed out that I was wearing my best clothes :)

I feel like this is if I see women who are suffering with facial hair and want to tell them about threading or laser treatment as I have suffered with this for years and it destroyed my confidence and now after having treatments I feel 100% more confident and happier, and hope it would help them, as I wish some had told me that there was help out there.

They probably know - they are quite well known things. Perhaps they don’t care, or don’t have the time or money for treatments. All of those things are ok. Not everyone centres physical appearance and to be honest, those who don’t are probably all the healthier for it psychologically.

Yeah I agree with pp. being so focused on appearance is a bit psychologically unhealthy. It’s not like she was going to the oscars either, it was the school run. Fleece would seem to be to be entirely appropriate.

I don’t have the money to go for hair lasering.

If I did, I’d spend it on something else anyway.

Not everyone cares about what you do. Shock.

It is expensive. Most people are going to have a lot of other calls on their income before they can think about spending money on grooming. Awful to think of other people judging them negatively because of that.

Crikey. So much to feel a bit glum about in this post.

I'm off to see my mum, who could proudly benefit from a new haircut, better clothes and maybe even some botox but who I adore because she's a bloody lovely caring thoughtful woman and what other women look like matters not one iota. I'll probably wear joggers and a hoodie, so we can be objects for somebody else to protect makeovers on to, together.

Autocorrect, you're an arse.

Proudy = probably
Protect = project

LeesPostersAreInFrames

The day I heard of Botox as a “beauty” treatment was the day I finally cocncluded that the world had, actually, finally gone mad.

Botox is the modern day equivalent of Elizabethan lead based foundation and belladonna eyedrops.

Very strange indeed what people are prepared to do to themselves in the name of beauty. Especially, I’ve observed, when the result is frequently the complete opposite.

Botox is the modern day equivalent of Elizabethan lead based foundation and belladonna eyedrops.

Yes. You would expect modern consumers to know that. Scary thought.

Why on earth wouldn't anybody inject poison into their skin in an effort to look young. Oh wait...

Bloody hell, how DARE she not dress to your standards eh.

Surprised so many agree with me after some of the comments I've read on MN about what people wear though

This thread makes me so sad
Both the ideas that 1)women should make the most of themselves but also that 2) appearance doesn’t matter and the belief that not confirming to the ideal of 1 is ok
It’s really not and I found this out myself and it’s really really beenhard.

I’ve never been one for make up. I’m a bit of an individual you could say ‘quirky’
I dress for comfort, my clothes are clean, not always ironed I wear odd socks a lot. My hair is usually tied up sometimes a bit greasy as I’m busy with kids/work etc
Sometimes I’m in a rush so although I try to be polite I’m busy and often in a hurry
Basically I can look less than ‘polished’

Long story short i requested help for my asd child got accused of all sorts eg that they were ok in school why was I asking for support that wasn’t needed and it was turned to me.
I did a SAR and mist of the files were full of observations on how I LOOK
Diary style format says that I looked ‘dishevelled’
Days that I looked ‘tired’ one day that I had ODD SOCKS and a stain on coat (baby had reflux and was sick on school run
Notes that I never chatted or attended parents nights out (they checked with class rep)
More info about the way I looked and questioning drug issues because I had marks on arms (eczema) and dc had an enamel problem with teeth.

So,looks do matter it seems if professionals can judge you on them and I feel that the message they don’t shouldn’t be so freely out out there when it’s not genuinely the case (it should be though)

morecoffeeagain that sounds like a very distressing experience for you, I hope you did manage to get the support your DC needed in the end.

Yes, what’s on the inside should be more important than how someone looks on the outside - but in reality a lot of people do make assumptions and judgments about other people based on their appearance, especially with people they don’t know well.

How dare they make notes like that based on nothing of any consequence. 😡

So much for professionalism.

IME scruffy jeans and trainers are usually the comfiest!

(And I speak as someone with hair like a Beegee)

I actually thought this might be a thread about me. It was recently hinted at to me that I should get gel nails and a hair cut. I like my mad frizzy hair and natural sometimes flakey nails, walking around in my gym and running gear. I wear jeans if I want to look slightly dressed up