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Original poster

I can solve all your problems, forever

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 27/03/2019 20:41

I'm a self appointed non medically trained kindly interested nurse. I am unfettered by knowledge or training and welcome you to my advice clinic.

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Thread gallery
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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 01:08

pig will the eventually eat it's own vomit? Can you wait it out?

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 01:08

^^cat

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polarpig · 01/04/2019 01:15

No, probably not. I've cleaned it up now as it was next to dd's bed. She was still asleep !

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 01:21

I guess the cat won, dogs can be relied upon to eat their own vomit. And shit, canine roombas really.

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TheLoneWolfDies · 01/04/2019 01:29

Well isn't this thread a breath of fresh air compared to AIBU. I do not have a slanket, but I do piss myself quite regularly and enjoy a good willy. Do I qualify?

thislido · 01/04/2019 01:54

You seem willing. How are you at lying down and eating monster munch whilst solving problems and refusing visitors?

A slanket is recommended, it enhances the comfort of the above.

A murderous streak comes in handy.

TheLoneWolfDies · 01/04/2019 01:59

Lying down and snacking is my top priority. Also very territorial so could definatly get used to refusing visitors.

I did have a slanket, many years ago.. I called it a snuggie though, whatever happened to it I'll never know, but I do miss the little fucker.

polarpig · 01/04/2019 01:59

Cats always win, and no doubt eat monster munch too.

GoFiguire · 01/04/2019 02:50

I like cake

Gettingnowhere · 01/04/2019 07:44

Hi New People. There's a lot of you, isn't there?

Polar we have had experience with cats before, including MrsCat's Bastard Cat, Schrödinger's cat, Elsa the Lion from Born Free and we seem to have a half ghost cat floating about somewhere. I tried to ban cats from Thighland once on account of them sitting in the doorway of Thighland and tripping up new Thisciples. But you know what cats are like...

Lone wolf YANBU. Do you have a problem we can solve? In the meantime, M3 is busy finding stuff for Thigh, we could get her to search for Snuggie too.

Which reminds me, did anyone see the thread about rude work emails last night? We once had a slanket called Barry who went to work in an office and write rude emails to people. The OP was commenting on the lack of please and thank yous In emails. That sounds like our Bazza. Only he goes that extra mile and tells people to fuck off too.

Go we all like cake here. Do you have a problem for us to solve?

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:04

Ad for a bath lift, bastards. I'm not that fat, yet.

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Gettingnowhere · 01/04/2019 08:11

I got "Thinking about a better current account?"

No

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:11

Since we're TRAs what is it we're not? TERFs or PERFs? I must try so hard not to be offensive.

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Gettingnowhere · 01/04/2019 08:13

I've forgotten what all that means. I'm not very clever. I think we're just a bunch of PERVs

MidnightBlue28 · 01/04/2019 08:17

I have lurked since the dawn of Thigh, watching amazed as she yawned and burped her way into the world, wrapped in a piss-sodden slanket 😉

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:22

I've just spotten @FermatsTheorum on AIBU complaining about being offered ads for gay cruises. This is easily explained:

i) she agreed to marry me and be sister wives with @NakedScientists
ii) yesterday she said this " Grin sea of cock"
iii) she's on a thread entitled "Do you like your partner's penis?"

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:23

I think we're NERFs.

Midnight have you lurked through 5/6 whole threads? Is it 5 or is it 6? I know it started on VD Day. A far greater gift than chocolates.......actually, not sure about that.

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Gettingnowhere · 01/04/2019 08:24

Excellent Bluey you deserve a fair dinkum Aussie nickname that I won't remember for that.

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:26

Ooh new ad for The National Theatre - they're really trying everything now.

Oh and a Virgin Train ad trying to force me to go to both Wigan and Birmingham - would that be the same train? Fuxake - Glasgow too!

And very expensive perfume, £113 when I could just piss myself for nothing.

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:28

Wolf is it fresh air? We really, really stink. We've given up baths, piss ourselves constantly, wear slankets and have a lawn flattening business to make full use of our fatness.

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Gettingnowhere · 01/04/2019 08:29

You classy cow. I'm just getting £14 perfume from Avon here

MidnightBlue28 · 01/04/2019 08:30

5/6 threads, who really knows... time and quantity become irrelevant when you are trying to achieve maximum reverse improvement

Gettingnowhere · 01/04/2019 08:31

Ever since I posted about Barry the slanket I've been getting ads for corporate meeting rooms Grin

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:31

Getting no need to remember anything. Dangly is our diarist, our Boswell. Also runs a mobile lobotomy clinic from her van.

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 08:34

Ugh, ad for safetots a retractable safety gate for tots. Is that due to the machine gun toting giraffes I'm setting on next door's cheery children? The polite and friendly little whores.

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