I can solve all your problems, forever

[pineapplebryanbrown]

I'm a self appointed non medically trained kindly interested nurse. I am unfettered by knowledge or training and welcome you to my advice clinic.

Can I just say this! I know we never get told off and are too lazy to address these issues but it does wind me up (hence the not infrequent violent death of my phone) that my phone applies pyntuation where none is applicable and doesn't add it when it would be required!

Aaaaaaagh!!

Sorry for rant, as you were ...

Seriously it still wrote pynctation!!!

Gah! It isn't scared of me any more!! Help!

Dangles I'm so, so impressed at your reference to Bunders, rock star of cereal killers. Don't worry about your pinctation we all know you're arseholed.

Thank you so much thigh I do think Bundy was quite attractive in his way! Shame he got electrocuted!

Never mind plenty of fish and all that.

Shall I go out tonight, or not?

Oh Dangles he needed to be electrocuted really, he was so dangerous. I read The Phantom Prince by Elizabeth Kendall years ago but it's about £200 now. Should have stolen it from the library when i had the chance.

Charley no. I mean, why would you, when you could chill at home instead?

Ooh, bomb making, I think that might be one of my skills. I've got the red wire and the blue wire and I'm happy to mix them up so the bomb can't be made safe. I've also got an old kitchen timer for the countdown. Some of the pixels don't work any more which will make it more fun guessing what the numbers might be.

I might just top up my gin glass first.

Oh don't forget that Reg makes weird things with wax, probs got semtex.

@PettyLaBelle

We neeed you to make a haunted nuclear bomb!!

And Lad's husband is a Russian chess grandmaster who communicates via blueberry yoghurt only.

(dog I'm not too worried about my shagging prospects today. shin is gone from your realm but his astral projection is very much still around up here)

(project bomb: are we going for explosive bits everywhere? Or a slow burner...so people only really start to feel the effects many years later?)

M3 big impact, we're attention seekers. However, we don't want to go to prison.

We could fit someone up i suppose.

I reckon we blame it all on Pauline!

We'll have to use bleach in the bomb, then Pauline will definitely get the blame.

Dog don't forget to add a pint of wine to your gin, it makes it nice!

Zoflore / Zoflora - don't even know how to spell it. Apparently the houseproud are crazy for it.

Ooh, now that does sound nice, - thanks Dangley.

Thigh are you suggesting I put Zoflora in my gin and wine mix...or is that what this heady mixture is called?

thigh is that for our cocktails or is it for the bomb?

I do hope you're not getting all hygienic again like when Pauline kidnapped you?

For bomb!