Drama in the local Facebook group.

[TheClaifeCrier]

A hairdresser opened up a salon in our village and spammed posted frequently in the village Facebook page about it.

The one and only Admin got annoyed and requested she stop. She kicked off, others joined the fray, pointing out that her posts were better than the ones about dog poo.

The admin archived the group in retaliation. He's just opened it up and announced he's quitting as admin.

So that's our scandal. Any going on in yours? It's better than Coronation Street.

Some of these are hilarious - I must join your FB pages. We are very quiet and boring here (I am glad to say). We were asked not to feed the local ducks bread as its bad for them. No dog poo stories as we are all fanatical about picking it up in case the dog poo police see us...

The low railway bridge has been struck again.

The rotten is a shithole and it's the council's fault

We Want More Vape Shops Not Charity Shops

It's all the migrants' fault (whatever it is)
Passive aggressive reporting of an incident that should have have been 111 or 999 at the time but "the police neva do anyfink"

I've unfollowed it but I'm 90% certain it's still full of the above.

Frequent complaints about why there aren't more clothes shops and shoe shops, like the nearest similar sized town. Always responded to by someone patiently pointing out that there used to be and they closed due to lack of trade, and it really isn't up to the Council
Frequent mutterings about new coffee shops and other shops frequented by "hipsters" and not normal people
Rubbish - complaints about fly-tipping, and some rather wonderful photos from an individual who spends time litter-picking various neighbourhoods
Parking whinges, often complete with photos of seriously crap parking
Driving whinges, usually from people who have "nearly been killed" by bad driving, and responded to by people who believe that driving fast is fine if you know what you're doing.
Quite a lot of lost pets - frequently with happy updates when they become found pets.

We currently have much excitement owing to the pub landlord announcing that the Leaver march will be stopping off there tomorrow, cue people threatening to boycott the pub forever. Landlord is a Remainer but says he welcomes all.

Another pub is undergoing major refurbishment and people are moaning that it won’t be the same as it used to be.

Other than that, we have a black panther sighting, a black cat that has gone missing, and an inconsiderately parked Mini outside the Co-op.

Every other post (university town) is about how we have too much student accommodation.
Local scandals like who's been moved off the market, who's harmed whose dog/scratched cars.
It is a fairly big town though and some deprived areas so also some "real" news like drug convictions.

Lots of missing cats in my town! Cue hysterical posts about the “Croydon Cat Killer”. Also people always posting for quotes from contractors “cheap as possible please”. Quality doesn’t seem to be an issue with these folks.

Dog Poo. Always dog poo. And fireworks.

Apart from that one time someone who hadn't lived in the village since nineteen canteen had an opinion about the new paint job on the pub. Now that was a fun Sunday.

Someone has nicked 2 bags of cement from someones drive and left a trail to their house from dragging it. But the victim doesnt mind because they were left over and he might drop a pile of bricks off on the perpetrators drive as he doesnt need those either

There was once absolute hysteria in ours (which I'm not a member of but DH is and I enjoy the odd read/laugh) because someone said that their four year old had reported that a man had opened their bedroom window, climbed in and then climbed out (of their own accord while child stayed silent and parents had no idea) and shut the window carefully behind them. People were talking about organising watches in shifts etc (never actually happened) - I wasn't brave enough to post, but I can't be the only one who thinks it sounds like a four year old had a bad dream?!

Frangipani Blue Workington !

Local elections - often not overtly but digs at or from the people involved.

My brother reports that the FB for my parents village, which for some reason he joined, is just straight up non-stop Middle England racism, with posts about 'suspicious' people every time someone non-white is seen

The usual parking near the school.
Two youths walking late at night and how everyone should be on their guard, even though the poor guys are probably just walking home.
A woman getting really annoyed with a pheasant that keeps walking through her garden and shes going to report it as lost to the local lost pets page. She feels the pheasants owner is not taking responsibility for it and she’s worried.
Same person saw a man drop a bit of paper out his pocket, he chased it but the wind took it and he’s getting called a litter bug and needs reporting.

Actually I must get my brother to check the group for me because my mum just became a parish councillor in an uncontested election despite not being very popular (she worked when we were children, a much criticised choice, and reads the Guardian - the only one in the village! - and has only lived there 24 years and so is seen as a newcomer) so I would like to see if there is some drama about it

Not strictly my local group...but the local area one for the pub I work at... vandalism of daffodils on one of the estates opposite the pub.

Makes a change from dog poo and lost phones I suppose

Strange cats in people's gardens being scooped up and taken to vets to be scanned,just leave them alone.
Beware- traffic jam at the top of -- hill. By the time it's been posted, said jam has disappeared.
Bin men not putting said bins back tidily.
My local mechanic often takes cars for a drive around after he's done work on them to make sure they're running properly. He had a woman jump into the road after he'd driven up her road twice. She wanted to know what he was doing. She was told next time she did that, he wouldn't stop.

I wish ours were so entertaining.

Ours are recommendation requests, always after "reasonable" or "not costing £££" tradespeople (like skilled work isn't worth paying for, sheesh), uninformed speculation about what will happen to empty premises and local businesses touting for trade

People are obsessed with cats wandering about its really odd they are cats they usually get home by themselves we have a local scanning group

No idea if there's a local fb group and won't be looking for it, thanks for the warning. Have to say, although the tabloids would have us believe we are surrounded by constant violent crime, it seems pretty peaceful out there thankfully.

@itsafuckingpotato I'm going to get a friend to suggest a Politics Day. That's genius, will be hilarious!

I tell you what, though, If you like a bit of melodrama, some Facebook groups about The Archers are full of it!

My local page has a squirrel obsession, the little varmints sneak into most conversations at some point

Other than that it's mostly about brexit & roadworks (OMG the roadworks are driving everyone insane!) with plenty of parking threads and a smattering of 'what's the helicopter doing?'

My hometown one is full of foaming at the mouth gammons banging on about Brexit and finally getting rid of all the “forriners“, Ben Bradley is the local MP and he posts a lot and is a total twat, someone’s put up a camera because of dog poo outside his house and people are frothing over that, several missing pets, oh and we’ve been banned from swearing.

I’m not on Facebook but it’s a guilty pleasure to go on my husbands and read our village page. It’s always the same though. What bins this week? A white van just drove through the village. Every Thursday at 8.05pm a message gets posted about a group of teenage boys in hoodies walking past the spar shop..... it’s the same reply every week about how the rugby has just finished and the boys are walking home. Parking at the school, collections for dog trust and a local hairdresser.

The village show in the summer brings a lot of posts. People saying it’s fixed and Mary’s ham was better than Sandra’s so why didn’t Sandra win? Was it because she gave Derek a dirty look in the spar in 1993?

Here's this morning's hot snippet from Smagma Dullsville:

"[a person is tagged] is that herring gulls on the field behind your house? There's at least 6 of them"