Ds very overweight.. Fact! Kick up MY arse needed

[Feellikeashitmum]

Ok so Ds 11 has had his results from the weight programme at school. He's very overweight.. I know he is. He carries it round his middle mostly and it seems like it's piled on the last 6 months or more.
No need to flame me, I feel completely shit and have had a cry (useless I know)
I do have another Ds 6 who's a normal weight just for full disclosure.
I know what I need to do and I will do it but just need to tell someone how utterly shit I feel.. also I'm going to write what he eats and see if anyone has any ideas.
Breakfast 2 weetabix and milk to cover then 2 slices 50/50 toast and butter (toast not daily but around 4 days a week)

Lunch 2 slices 50/50 sandwich with homemade tuna mayo, cheese spread or corned beef. Pack crisps and yog tube plus a pot of apricots/satsuma/ blueberries

Snack Pack raisins/oaty biscuit or a bag of mini biscuits or half bag snack a jacks

Dinner Cottage pie, spag bol, fish nuggets (fresh ones but shop bought) all homemade with pasta mash pots and frozen begs or beans.

His portions are too big I'm sure and I can see what I can cut out etc but I don't want him to know exactly what's going on though I may say that his weight results came back and he's a little heavier than is healthy so we need to make some changes (is that a bad idea?)

Exercise wise he does 1 hour Monday after school.. 2 hours Fri after school plus weekends are busy and active being outside a lot also impromptu exercise after school like playing footie for an hours with friends or similar.
Thanks for reading my ramblings...
I know what I need to do but getting some support/ideas would be good too

Drinks wise he only drinks water or squash occasionly and very rarely a coke at the pub

Encourage healthy eating in the home, get rid of temptation and step up the exercise. A trampoline in the garden is great. He could use it every day

I think toast and cereal is a bit much. No flamingfrom me. You’re doing your best

Even allowing for big portions that doesn't sound like an excessive amount of food for an 11 year old boy. My ds is nearly 11 and eats more than that....he's not overweight.

Sorry, I realise that isn't particularly helpful.

I'd wonder if he's snacking as well.

We just got rid of our trampoline.. broken and can't afford a new one. He does a weekly trampoline class plus friend has one and they will use it now the weather is nice. School is only a 5 minute walk too.. he does have a bike so maybe more riding now the weather is better

It sounds like a big breakfast but otherwise not excessive. Are you sure he’s not buying extra food after school? Add a sneaky McD’s onto that on school nights and it might explain the gain?

He's does snack.. I think I've not been keeping track so probably too many snacks slipping through

What does he drink? Just wondering if he is getting excess calories from any fizzy drinks, fruit juice, milk etc.

Am 100% definite he's not buying any other food..

He drinks mostly water but does have milk. Squash once a week and coke once a month if that. He always says he prefers water!

Portion size. I bet he eats big plate sizes! So use his hand make a fist and that the portion size for a bit of protein, some healthy carbs and you can go unlimited for veg/salad.

Also swap out some of the sugary stuff like yoghurts and the fruit for crudités and longer lasting snacks like oat cakes.

Exercise- at least 30 mins of cardio a day.

You could start running together?

Swimming, walking more, smaller portions, fewer carbs, google the calories in the fruit he’s getting and switch to lower calorie ones such as strawberries and apples and serve more protein.

TBH that all sounds fine to me so assume his portions must be very big or he's snacking on other stuff in the day.

DD has a big breakfast and is pretty slim and it's not an unhealthy breakfast anyway. Is it with semi-skimmed milk?

Do you use jar sauces? I'm clutching at straws a bit, OP, because it really doesn't sound that bad!

do you think he's due a growth spurt?

Personally, I wouldn't say a single word to him about the letter.

I'd sneak in little changes, one at a time, so they're almost unnoticeable. I reckon you could easily cut a lot of fat in that food without losing bulk or basic structure of meals and snacks.

Is he buying food on the way to or from school? Or fizzy drinks? If he didn't have a problem until six months ago, he could just be building up for a massive growth spurt, but at least if you get the changes in place, you can re-evaluate a few months down the line.

It’s also worth thinking that maybe he’s about to have a stretch....

I think toast and cereal is a bit much. No flaming from me.
Hardly, we eat that plus fruit and we are slim. Lots of factors can come into this. If what you are saying concerning food and diet is exactly correct. That is, there is no secret eating or anything. Maybe see a doctor, sometimes something more underlying might be going on.

My plan is a better breakfast , eggs and beans or the weetabix and banana

Just need to sort a decent lunch for pack up and cut out any snacks except one at school maybe.
Plus don't want to go overboard on fruit either

Sorry I saw you said he is not having other food, not sure how I missed that.

Part of it could be hormonal. Even my ways ski NY boy, plus now skinny adult son was podgy at around 12 and then stretched out of it. Diet sou d faiy normal tbh. Slightly cut back portions, even if it's just using thinner bread so he won't really notice.

Yes to semi skimmed milk and we don't use jar sauces. I did slimming world so cook everything from scratch.

Whats the best yogs? He does like a pudding after his dinner and it's usually a low fat fruit one with a pot of berries or satsuma

Tbh, unless the snacks are massive and really unhealthy, he's eating similar amounts to my 2 DS (12 and 10). Maybe the difference is activity levels? Both mine are very slim and I actually try to build them up a bit (my second ds is small) but they both do a lot of exercise- one in a football club and one in a swimming club. We have a dog so lots of dog walking and cycling too!

Have you tried freecycle, local adds or asking friends with older dc if they have a trampoline in need of a new home? You’ll get loads of advice on diet but daily exercise is a great habit to get into and will help keep him from snacking through boredom

plain or Greek yoghurt with fruit or honey added by you? He does need some fat, he's a growing child.

I really think it'll be portions, if anything. Do you weigh your pasta out? We have 3oz per adult, 2oz for DD (9), though she probably wouldn't eat that much.