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I can offer you solutions to all your problems *Title edited by MNHQ at OP's request*

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 21/02/2019 18:07

Do you have a problem? Bring it to Thighland and we will solve it for you.

After we have solved your problem we will nurse you back to full health and change your life for the better.....forever

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thislido · 26/02/2019 18:25

I wonder if Barry will be there.

DanglyTassles · 26/02/2019 18:28

thislido you are on FIRE!!

I'm thstaggered at all the suggestions for Gotten to be gotten to work!

I was just going to suggest that she packs he job in and lies down instead.

OR stay employed but go off on long term sick leave with anxiety (can't be proven and if they want proof do this face to show them that you're very anxious Shock) Then lie down.

thislido · 26/02/2019 18:28

Will there be a lot of alcohol? You might get some organs out of them.

thislido · 26/02/2019 18:32

I can't stop posting, the Thorce has overtaken me.

Good point re illness, labyrinthitis and lupus are the thavoured ones. With lupus you don't have to turn into an actual wolf.

DanglyTassles · 26/02/2019 18:33

Hi Klept yes maybe bump a few off for new livers for us!

OR call in sick with anxiety as described previously!

OR worst ways, do it today but be really scary and unfriendly and don't gain ANY new contacts so you will not have to see them ever again!

Kleptronic · 26/02/2019 18:36

Ha ha Dangly that is my usual modus operandi. I was hoping for a change, but I'll go with an escalation and harvest the organs.

DanglyTassles · 26/02/2019 19:22

Yippee!

Can anyone sew them in for us?

Hey Gang, is anyone here into new organ installation as a sideline hobby?

pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:35

Thislido you're cooking on gas tonight! The force of Thigh is running very strongly in you, I'm so proud of you.

I'm your therapist and I think you are perfect.

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:37

Kleptronic you are meeting 25 "men" yet not lying down. I don't understand, are you a VD nurse?

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:40

Dangly I'm in charge of organ harvesting and implantation. I've got a spoon, a bucket and some pritt stick. Would that work?

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:41

It is OK to call in sick suffering from megalomania. I've done it myself.

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:42

Thislido with lupus although you don't have to turn into a wolf you can should the mood take you.

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ProjectGainsborough · 26/02/2019 19:44

kleptronic the only proper opener is ‘have you considered organ donation?’

ProjectGainsborough · 26/02/2019 19:45

I’m just catching up after real life n shiz. I’m so touched by thigh’s card, I could cry.

pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:50

ProjectGainsborough we're always thinking of you. How is Fagin? Does he progress in his ferocious intelligence and dark leanings?

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:52

Kleptro would you consider changing your name to simply Klepto I just prefer it.

Project has given you a perfect opening line. Perhaps we should replace "how are you?" with "have you considered organ donation?" in all situations.

I can't see how anyone could be offended by that. It's just caring n sharing innit?

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:53

Maybe leave out harvesting.

So -

"have you considered organ donation?" - GOOD

"I want to harvest your organs" - BAD

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pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 19:56

Also - not meaning to be casually xenophobic or owt but DON'T say

"I VANT to harvest your organs"

people can be super judgey sometimes.

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DanglyTassles · 26/02/2019 20:03

If we do get any, you can put mine in with Pritt stick thigh, I trust you implicitly.

pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 20:05

Dangly cool, but aren't we using your "husband's" for you? It's getting closer and closer to the weekend Dangly and you know what that means.....

....CAT'S BUM FACE

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DanglyTassles · 26/02/2019 20:10

Hmmm yes there is that! I was thinking it'd be less bother to just let Klept get one for me but now you mention the dreaded ...

... CAT'S BUM FACE

Well I'm afraid I'll need to borrow the pigs and Elsa again. I just cannot have sour men spoiling my wine.

pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 20:13

Dangly unspoiled liver first before body to the pigs, you can have a fresh one. Just imagine how much more wine you can drink! Actually - keep the one you have and we'll pop his in too!

Two livers, that's what you really wanted for Christmas.

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Luaa · 26/02/2019 20:17

I will happily nibble the lawn edging, but do I get to roll around as well? I do enjoy rolling.

I'm afraid I have to confess I snuck LuaaCat in to Thighland right at the start. I realised dogs were preferable, but didn't realise there were no cats allowed, sorry. In fairness to her, she is very Thigh. Her hobbies are laying down indoors, laying down outdoors, demanding people give her food and acting aloof with MrLuaa. Please can she stay?

"Have you considered organ donation" is a great opening line. I'm going out drinking play the weekend, if any strangers talk to me, that's what I'm opening with.

ProjectGainsborough · 26/02/2019 20:17

The dark lord has requested a telescope. He says it’s for ‘star gazing’. Am I cynical to suspect his purposes are nefarious?

pineapplebryanbrown · 26/02/2019 20:20

Luaa cats are allowed, they just need careful watching as dogs are just.......more dog like shall we say.

Of course you can roll around, you have a slanket, probably a bamboo one. But I think you will particularly enjoy having some lawn edging for lunch.

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