I can offer you solutions to all your problems *Title edited by MNHQ at OP's request*

[pineapplebryanbrown]

Do you have a problem? Bring it to Thighland and we will solve it for you.

After we have solved your problem we will nurse you back to full health and change your life for the better.....forever

Great and glorious Thigh! Your sonorous roar echoes through my heart

Thank fuck for that O Great Quads I was only joking about someone stepping in, honest.

I dug deeply into the pocket of my magical slanket and found an out of date Cadburys Christmas Decoration. How did i miss that previously, how has it remained uneaten?

Still i threw it tearfully at the Dark Lord in Training. He is ferocious, he was leaping with his eyes 👀 fixed on my jugular. I screamed and uttered "your mother has to sell up because of you, Tony Soprano Jr".

This discombobulated him long enough for me to leap onto Elsa's back and ride away.

Project he snarled and left, he has your car keys.

Well done Thigh! Now lie down and recover!

Thislido! your lack of panic and total fucking ennui has hurt my fee fees!

Oh Thigh. I cannot tell you how my body fills with sunshine and birdsong and daffodils at the thought of you being safe. It's like all the baby animals of spring have gathered in my heart for a music festival.

But where are you now? If you're riding Elsa, you can't possibly be lying down

Cat who's the real Bastard eh? I forgive you, you're our nightwatchperson.

Checks for gaps between our Thighs as we slumber.

Getting do you feel a warm sun like glow between your Thighs. Tis Elsa and me, we're coming to pick you up.

Cat i must retire to my panic room for the night. I entrust our glorious Nation into your safe keeping for the nightwatch xx

That’s faith for you, Thigh, I had every confidence you would survive. Panic in Thighworld seems wrong, like lying down and bicycling your legs madly.

thigh your ingenuity astounds me. Never let Elsa leave your side.

I had to get up early this morning for management and shiz (don’t worry, I have Barry with me).

Found the dark lordlet sleeping, smeared in Cadbury’s chocolate and lying amidst a pile of silverware and electronics. The car is strangely missing. I did hear on the news that a similar car was used in a heist near Cardiff. Odd coincidence.

Oh what a glorious night that turned out to be! When Thigh said she was coming to get me on Elsa I got so excited a little bit off pee leaked out.

Thighland is beautiful at night. The stars in the Elsa constellation shine so bright. And to the south, I could see the "Great Queue". Naked I'm not a scientist like you, but I'm pretty sure I could see Uranus forming part of the Queue.

< YAWNS, Stretches >

G'day Shielas,

I slept through ... what did I miss?

The coffee machine at work is buggered. The men at work are moaning. Please beam me up and get me out of here before I snap.

Here you are

Martha finally! Where in the name of fuck and all that is Thigh have you been?

Thislido i see, so it was faith not a lack of love ❤ for Thigh? I'll take it.

I really don't know,

Twasn't a nice place though....

No one insisting I have VERY regular naps whilst all trussed up In a comfy slanket either....

Just glad I made it back

Great Thigh I guarded kingdom against treachery all night - from my comfy divan. We obviously need to be more vigilant against our walls being penetrated during the day by micro Dark Lords and other fiends.

O Maternalist Dictator, I have left offerings of monster munch (mega variety bag), Cadbury chocolate buttons and a selection of Oddbins finest outside your boudoir aka panic room.

Citizens of Thigh let us follow the examples of our Great Leader, Laksa and Getting who faught back against those that wished them harm and ensure we always have chocolate and shizz about our person at all times.

Thigh I cannot believe I waketh up and find we nearly lost our awesome leader to the Dark Lord !!

Project in the name of all that is thigh, please keep the dark force contained within it's room so that thigh can get her rest and lie down, she should not be having escaping adventures riding Elsa for too long, sounds exhausting!!

Thigh have a lovely lie down now and recuperate your powers, and might I add, thank you for this thabulous weather!

Definitely faith, thigh. I would bow but I’m confused about the line between deity and management.

thislido don't worry, we can bow and courtsey and shizz. Managers are bound by 'employment law and employee rights' and shizz not to have people bow at them so if we bow at thigh we are declaring that we KNOW in our hearts that she is NOT a manager.

Thanks Dangly. Performing the supine bow as we speak

HHHHUUUUUURRRRRGGGHHHH! GGHGGGG! AAARRRRGGGHH! UUUUUUUURRRRRGGHH!

Am I too late?