Why are some people successful?

[Gwenhwyfar]

I'd like to get your opinions on why some people are successful (particularly at work, but also in general) and others are unsuccessful. I'm looking for personality types and soft skills rather than hard skills I understand that someone with a masters in a STEM subject might have a better chance of making money than someone with a BA in an Arts subject or just GCSEs, but I'm thinking more of things like being confident, being positive, being sociable and why do you think some people have those qualities and others don't. Is it down to early childhood or are they things that can change throughout our lives?

Me-being prepared to take a risk and hold out for a key role at a crucial point in my career. Plus tbh working 6 days a week and long hours.

My dh- motivation, likes money and spending it. Clever , sociable, nice guy. Got a good professional qualification and developed expertise.

silkei not enjoying something is not the same as it not being seen as successful.

You get a lot cultural capital which is the same as success for many people. And crap pay? Give over. It’s hardly minimum wage.

Silkei out of interest what do you deem successful then??

£60k+ salary, job security, respect, and reasonable working hours that don’t give you a nervous breakdown.

"Lecturers have a heavy workload and earn a pittance."

They don't earn a pittance. The ones I know earn over 30k. I realise that's not much in London, but you can have a very good life on that where I live. It annoys me when lecturers call themselves 'poor'.

To add, when I went back to work after 2nd child our childcare costs were more than my salary but we took a long term view.

See I don’t agree. Surely success is all relative. If lecturing is that persons draam job and they feel fufilled and challenged doing it, then who is anyone else to say it’s not successful?!

The point is that they worked hard, against the odds, to get to somewhere that they wanted to be. They took charge of their career and got to where they wanted, rather than drifting in the current like so many of us do.

"£60k+ salary, job security, respect, and reasonable working hours that don’t give you a nervous breakdown."

OK, but my definition is different. Pretty similar except that the money doesn't need to be as high. There have been plenty of studies showing that once you earn around average you don't get much happier with every additional thousand.

That was the @silkie

Silkei and no she wouldn’t earn more at McDonald’s (just for the record a managerial role there is approx 27k)

Lecturing jobs only pay about £30k and they’re reluctant to pay more if they can get away with it. You may be able to blag your way up to about £45-50k over a few decades if you don’t have a nervous breakdown due to the pressure and workload. Teaching is NOT a successful career for anyone nowadays.

Many lecturers earn around/slightly lower than £30k. Many are in HE which is poorly paying. An emeritus professor at oxbridge earns considerably more. Lots are part time and only for working hours.

@Silkei sounds like you have a bit of a chip on your shoulder there perhaps? Just saying everyone has their own dreams etc so don’t knock when they get there just because it didn’t work for you doesn’t mean it won’t work for them.

I think I’m fairly successful has a person, I have my family (Dc’s) I own my own properties (outright) and I’m ‘just a primary school teacher’. I think it’s priorities and focus that get you what you want. Every job I have ever interviewed for I got it. So it must have something to do with personality too!

It's luck. If you are highly skilled, well educated and still haven't "made it", then you just havent been lucky.

Chance meetings, somebody elses failure, opportunity, all play a part. Think about singers and actors. Professionally I know dozens and dozens of people who are amazingly tallented, but the world has never heard of them because they just havent had that "break".

Charlize Theron was a broke wanna be actress who was spotted as she had a melt down in a bank when the teller refused to cash her cheque. If that cheque hadn't bounced, she would never have been spotted by the agent who was waiting in line behind her.

Harrison Ford was another broke actor who had given up on his dream of becoming a star and went back to work as a carpenter. Then one day he was phoned by a guy who wanted some new cupboards put into his kitchen. Harrison Ford packed his tools into his van and drove to the guys house, the home owner was a man called George Lucas . . .

It's all about luck, some tallent is required, but you need just as much luck.

You would earn more as a primary/secondary teacher than a lecturer over a typical career I would expect.

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"Some lecturers actually live in council houses because the pay is so rubbish."

I don't believe this except if the person is older or lives extremely rurally. When I was on 16k I wouldn't have been eligible for a council house (am single).

As I get older I increasingly think resilience is the most important thing. Take knock-backs and get back up again.

It’s the most useful thing to teach our children.

The successful people I know have a few things in common.
They work hard consistently.
They set goals and stick to them
They aren't in the least threatened by or put off by failure. They see it as part of the learning process, put it to good use and keep going.
They have an unshakable self-confidence and equally unshakable belief in the value of what they are doing. They might be quiet modest people who never mention this or bombastic people who shove it in your face all the time, but they all have it.
I envy them and have tried often to learn to be mor elike them. But I lack consistency and they don't. I lack energy and they don't. And I massively lack self-confidence, and they don't.

@silkei I know her pay and it’s way off 30k! We are in €’s here and I don’t know where you are but teaching professionals are highly regarded here. A primary school teacher here starts at 36k

And crap pay? Give over. It’s hardly minimum wage.

£30k is poor imo if you have to spend years unpaid while you qualify then work ridiculous hours in your job and literally sell your soul. You can get £30k in lots of much less demanding jobs with fewer qualifications. £30k is a fairly average salary - since when has average been classed as “successful”? By definition “success” is achieving more than others!

focus, persistence, resilience, self belief, arrogance, ambition, ruthlessness, plus being talented/ creative/good at the 'job'- putting their will to succeed above all else and everyone else ( i'm not trying to imply successful people are horrible- they are often very charismatic)

And by off I mean above!!

Lecturers can be on zero hours contracts as well.

@Silkei I didn’t say she earned 30k I said way above it (I was responding to another post that said lecturers earn 30k

We are in €’s here and I don’t know where you are but teaching professionals are highly regarded here. A primary school teacher here starts at 36k

A primary teacher in England would earn £23k. Teachers receive very little respect. If you’re somewhere else then that would explain why you perceive teaching as a successful career.

"it’s not all about money anyway

I’d argue that if you’re low paid you’re not “successful”."

I agree, but low paid for me is under 20k, not your (and MN's) idea of under 60k. I presume in London it would have to be about 35k for the same standard of living. A good wage would be whatever is enough to get a mortgage on your own.