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Original poster

Fuck off to the far side of fuck, and when you get there, fuck off some more

234 replies

NoLeslie · 03/12/2018 15:01

This thread is dedicated to all the people and things that need to fuck off. Add whatever you like.

  1. Most of my board of directors.
  2. WH Smith.
  3. Premature death.
OP posts:
Rattinghat · 04/12/2018 16:08

Yeah my mind boggles at the vileness of people who bag up dog poo and hang it on a twig. If you are that lazy and pathetic, just let your dog shit anywhere. But of course then they might step in it themselves the next day. So instead they make a faeces christmas tree.

Seriously, fuck yourselves. I hope your own dog savages you.

shadypines · 04/12/2018 16:09

not to mention....

My line manager's incessant jabbering about non work stuff - shut the fuck up so I can concentrate on my work.

Phone zombies on pavements, roads, in shops, on buses but most of all the parents in this category who are more fascinated with their phones than their kids.

Worrying, mainly about DC's

lucysmam · 04/12/2018 17:06

The work colleagues who I know are bitching about me behind my back because I have volunteered to do other things at work too, to help out (massively short staffed school). You know when you walk into a room, the conversation unnaturally stops & everyone stares at you? That. Worse that our supervisor confirmed it last week, spoke to our line manager & they've carried on today when the supervisor wasn't in & I was pretty much ignored/talked over the whole time I was there

Wine all round

happinessischocolate · 04/12/2018 17:28

Yeah my mind boggles at the vileness of people who bag up dog poo and hang it on a twig. If you are that lazy and pathetic, just let your dog shit anywhere. But of course then they might step in it themselves the next day. So instead they make a faeces christmas tree.

I don't believe that people actually do this.

A friend was ranting on fb about the fact that someone had thrown loads of poo bags up a tree. He wouldn't consider the possibility that the wind had done it? There was a full poo bin near the tree and it had been really windy the night before, but thought it impossible that the wind could blow the bags into the tree.

AnoukSpirit · 04/12/2018 17:44

Hospitals that dish out brutality instead of care.

Life.

PortiaCastis · 04/12/2018 17:46

Bitching and plain bottom scraping nastiness spouted by those who are lacking
Drunks who puke over the pavement
The bastard who hit my car and drove off

formerbabe · 04/12/2018 17:58

Adults who cycle on the pavement.

marvellousnightforamooncup · 04/12/2018 18:23

Christmas shopping can fuck off. Shops piled high with tatty shit that wastes the world's resources and nearly bankrupts you because you have to buy it for your nieces or risk falling out with the in laws. I don't want any stuff bought for me or my kids and I don't want to traipse about the shops or give any more money to Amazon. I'd prefer a home made card or some jam.

pointythings · 04/12/2018 19:47
  1. 17 and 18 Brexiteers (not all Leave voters) Alcoholism The A14
chillimartini · 04/12/2018 20:12

Illness

Fleabag123 · 04/12/2018 20:13

Yy to Christmas shopping. Can’t be arsed this year. I don’t need stuff and am trying to move house so don’t want a load more clutter

I have no issue with giving to others but prefer it to be meaningful presents - not just tat for the sake of it

Stormwhale · 04/12/2018 20:16

All the things that I need to do in the evening once I'm too tired to be bothered. Fuck off washing, fuck off tidying, fuck off washing my face and brushing my teeth. Fuck off every single thing that stands between me and my bed.

colouringinpro · 04/12/2018 20:53

The fucking toxic genes from my ex OH family which means I'm now parenting an autistic daughter, a ds with ptsd. I'm seriously ill with anxiety and depression as a result of 8 years of acute stress and trauma. And the fucking totally incompetent CAMHS WHO are not only totally failing my ds but are causing extra stress and upset in the process. And my fucking ex fottfsofafoa

Tackytriceratops · 04/12/2018 20:56

Asthma and viruses.

Bluemascara4 · 04/12/2018 21:02

My STBXH
His family
Cancer
Anyone who attempts to chat to me when I've got headphones in

SeaViewBliss · 04/12/2018 21:04

All the things I am encountering in my new job;
Domestic violence
Child poverty
Homelessness

For me personally, kidney stones and diverticulitis.

colouringinpro · 04/12/2018 21:09

anouk Flowers

skippythebushkangarootoo · 04/12/2018 21:14

My parents

ImogenTubbs · 04/12/2018 21:21

DH's brain injury and post-concussion syndrome. Eight months now. It can fuck off already.

SukiPutTheEarlGreyOn · 04/12/2018 21:22

Grumpy teenagers.
Officious administrators.
Those who think you are fortunate to be able to wander through a cloud of their vape grot while walking down the street.

NormHonal · 04/12/2018 21:22

The rain. I can do cold/dry weather. Cold/wet weather is horrid.
DP's bastarding cough.
Christmas cards.
Christmas decorations.
DS's anxiety.
The School Christmas Play.

Siwdmae · 04/12/2018 22:13

The fucking cunt who had no clue how to support me when a comment was made at work and blew it up into a ridiculous mountain which led to me feeling I had to resign when she is clueless, disorganized and universally hated. I hate where I work now and I miss my colleagues desperately and the miss me. Fuck you, you horrible fucking bitch.

Thanks, OP, I needed that. :)

MulticolourMophead · 04/12/2018 22:56

A friend was ranting on fb about the fact that someone had thrown loads of poo bags up a tree. He wouldn't consider the possibility that the wind had done it? There was a full poo bin near the tree and it had been really windy the night before, but thought it impossible that the wind could blow the bags into the tree.

People do put poo bags onto a branch of a tree. I've seen people do it, but wasn't able to call them out as I was driving.

Willow2017 · 04/12/2018 23:19

I don't believe that people actually do this.
A friend was ranting on fb about the fact that someone had thrown loads of poo bags up a tree. He wouldn't consider the possibility that the wind had done it? There was a full poo bin near the tree and it had been really windy the night before, but thought it impossible that the wind could blow the bags into the tree.

Goodness do you walk around with your eyes closed?
Of course people do this. Some with the excuse that they will pick it up on the way home, some because they are just lazy gits who cant be bothered to find a bin and think its offensive to carry a closed bag of thier own dogs poo but not offensive to deface trees with it.

I dont believe for one second that a wind blew all the poo bags up into a tree at once out of a bin, now thats far fetched.

SapphireSeptember · 04/12/2018 23:30

Brexit, fucking shit fest of epic proportions! I didn't vote for it, and neither did most of the people I know (very few of whom have gone through higher education and who are working class, so the sneery twats saying it was only well educated middle class people who voted Remain can fuck off too.)
Fucking Tories! Especially you, Rees-Mogg, You're a Cunt with a capital C!
Donald Trump and the nightmare that is American politics at the moment, he can fuck right off!
Religious fundamentalists, they piss me off no end. Angry
On a more personal level, judge-y twats. "Why are you dressed like that? What on earth have you got on your face? How can you still like Harry Potter when you're 30? Why do you listen to such depressing music? What have you got to be depressed about? Etc, etc...

FUCK. OFF! I've got this less as I've got older (minus the HP stuff,) but on the rare times this still happens, were it not for rigorous gun control, I'd be reaching for the AK-47. A slight overreaction, mayhap, but you know how it is. And sometimes people don't need to say anything, they just give you The Look, and you know they're judging you (especially when I go to church, I get The Look there a lot. I also once got into an argument with someone who thinks Evanescence and Amy Lee especially are scary. Fucking hell. I'm sure her four year old son thinks she's terrifying, not. Unless she's telling him off, possibly. I digress...)

I suppose that's another thing that I wish would get tae fuck, people who think the music I listen to is depressing, or weird, or scary, or what the fuck ever. Get a life. Is it affecting you? No. Am I forcing you to listen to it? No. Good, now fuck off. Yes, my favourite band is the one with the weird Goth chick who sang 'Wake me up inside'. (Although you could at least try and get the song title right, you muppet.) They've also moved on quite a bit and have done three albums since the one with that song, and Amy Lee doesn't look the same as she did 15 years ago (does anyone?) Grrr. (Diss Evanescence, and prepare to die.)
On the other hand, you have snotty Goths and metalheads who sneer at my taste in music, or my style. They are thankfully rare, but annoying.
Phew, was was cathartic!