Christmas film adoration and rant!

[TheZeppo]

I love Christmas movies. They are filling my Saturdays currently (tragic).

BUT

I’m getting very hacked off with the ‘re-write history’ ones, as it inevitably seems to say that someone who chooses their career is missing out, and that a —mundane— family life is superior.

They never seem to show it the other way round. I realise that’s not Christmassy, but come on!

They have taught me a valuable lesson though. I’m still single, as I haven’t yet met Santa’s heir 😂

#Lighthearted

"Channel 5 have Xmas films on EVERY afternoon at the moment. If you have freeview there is an actual channel dedicates to the cheesiest Christmas films. It's called True Christmas. It produces the cheesiest films ever!!" I know, Myselfonashelf, I've been flicking between Ch5 and TrueChristmas for the last two weeks!!

"The Mrs Miracle movies are ruined for me because the actress also plays the passive aggressive MIL in Everybody Loves Raymond. So whenever she says something nice, I look for the hidden meaning behind it." Ah, nevermorelenore, I kind of loved her in the Xmas film because she wasn't Debra's awful MIL!!

I watched one, within the last 7-10 days, which I can barely describe , but was great. There were two or three families in a ruralish area (well, there's a surprise!) and when the DC were very young, the dads made a special dining table for the DC - the son of one family and the daughter of another family used to sit underneath it at the end of the Xmas meal whilst all the adults carried on having fun.

The film then followed them through years - from their childhood years to adult years. Eventually the two of them got together in their late 20s (?). Anyone remember what it was called?!

Oh I am such a numpty! That film is called Love At The Christmas Table. I'm sure it will be repeated over the next few weeks.

I just cannot cope with not knowing how these end!!
Was the snowman the love of her life?
Did they make snow babies?

Between channel 5 and true Christmas, I have sky plussed enough to get me through to next Christmas 😂

Be careful TheZeppo I sky recorded so many yesterday apparently all at the same time and dh's new Beeb drama didn't record he wasn't best pleased.

Hats off to Christmas is a favourite here.
Every year it provokes heated discussion about their business model and whether a company devoted to Christmas hats would have such extensive office space.

My favourite films are those where the aggressive asset stripping out of towners will foreclose on the loan on the community project/folksy family business on Christmas Eve. Could it really not wait until the New Year?

I watched a drip feed one yesterday which made me think of mumsnet. Woman and son move back to old small town. Neighbour is aloof. It turns out neighbour is very much connected to the mother and son but it's drip drip drip all the way through, with highly irritating near misses and coincidences, until the MASSIVE TWIST right at the end.. which I worked out near the beginning. I think it's called The Christmas Note. Irritating but adorbs [santa]

I just cannot cope with not knowing how these end!!

It always ends happily!

If I win the lottery I’m going to make a cheesy Xmas film that ends really horribly. Lure people in and then crush them at the end. Like the career lady leaves her small town and goes back to her job in NYC, the toy shop gets taken over by an evil corporation, and the single dad love interest and his quirky daughter spend Xmas eating beans out of a can. Just really bum people out when they’re watching True Christmas.

Ch5 is fabulous this time of year, I love shmaltzy predictable Christmas films, my DH hates them.

A favourite is Let it Snow with Candace Cameroin Bure, who seems to be in lots of these types of films .

Big city exec (Candace)
Grinchy father (played by Robin Thicke’s Dad)

He’s bought Snow Valley Lodge which does a lovely family Xmas every year. Grinch father wants it turned into a place for DINKS (Double Incime No Kids).
Sends grinchy daughter (Candace) to work out how this is done.
Grinchy daughter falls in love with Xmas and the son of the current owners.
Current owners are cosy lady who bakes all Xmas goodies and who teaches grinchy daughter to bake and cosy lady’s hubby who does everything else.

Grinchy father turns up, sacks daughter for loving Christmas and saying Snow Valley Lodge must stay just as it is.

Just to nail it they have daughter sat with new beau in Snow Valley Lodge having a warm and cosy Xmas meal while Grinch Dad is left to eat in a cold unfriendly diner having stomped off.

Then he has a change of heart and returns to Snow Valley Lodge dressed as Santa to dish out gifts to all the children staying there that Xmas.

He agrees to keep it the same and installs daughter and new beau as general managers.

It’s shite of the highest order and I absolutely LOVE it. I may have seen it too many times. I actually wish the lovely cosy lady who does all the cooking and baking for her guests really existed. I may even have tweeted the actress to tell her this

I just cannot cope with not knowing how these end!!
Was the snowman the love of her life

Seen that one before. It ends as it should

I'm enjoying all the cheese on Channel 5.
My favourite line has been
"Snow.M.G" by some do-gooding elf

Good one onvthis afternoon. 12 Days of Christmas. A guy makes a girls Christmas very special when they are stuck in the snow at college.

He never returns after the holidays and she never knows why.

10 years later he turns up at her home town as the local radio host buf has turned into the Grinch. She starts to send him 12 tasks to get him intobthe spirit.

He has no idea if is her..

Kristen's Christmas Past us currently on Paramount.

Judd Nelson in another shitty film.

I'm loving it!

Terrible typos there but you get the drift.

"If I win the lottery I’m going to make a cheesy Xmas film that ends really horribly. Lure people in and then crush them at the end." Sorry, nevermorelenore, but I think we'll have to give you the banhammer from this thread 🔨

"12 Gifts of Christmas"

Stunningly pretty struggling artist living in her sister's basement , sister has two adorable DDs.

Encounter in a Coffee/Muffin shop with attractive , uptight , Christmas hating hero .

She offers to "Do" his Christmas shopping .
Donna Mills is the Mother who welcomes Struggling Artist into her family on first sight (that would be enough to put you off )

Of course there are tears and tribulations

And there was one I couldn't finish.
Very pretty estate agent goes to do a valuation of a sprawling vineyard , falls out with moody brooding widowed owner .
"Don't go into that room" he says . (So you can guess what she does)

Unless the temperature suddenly plummeted , there was NO SNOW , it was a vineyard .
Sadly lacking, I didn't find out the end .

70 oh oh oh! Was that the one based on Beauty and the Beast? that I didn’t realise until the end despite her name being Belle, the dog Beast and the roses in the forbidden room

Snow my God 😂

Oh- I love shit Hallmark Christmas films. They fill my days from October onwards .

I love the inevitable 'twist' that always happens about 25 minutes before the end of the film. But - don't panic- it will all be tied up nicely at the end .

Another thing that dd1 and I have noticed, that if a crisis happens on Christmas eve (as it always does) - when you consider the number of wacky things the characters will go through to resolve it all before the end, then Christmas eve must have about 124 hours in it. . And it will still be early enough for a party ...

Zeppo , I think it's "Christmas Belle" (I had to do a search ), the blurb sounds familiar

I will watch the "Angels" one on Friday .

I watched the first 30 seconds of "Merry Ex-Mas" , Kirsty Swanson is getting well into CheeseyChristmasFilm Territory

Sorry, nevermorelenore, but I think we'll have to give you the banhammer from this thread

Nooo, I love them really!

As penance, I am going to recommend the TV show Chesapeake Shores to the good people of this thread. It’s the non-Christmas equivalent of a Christmas movie. Divorced career lady moves back to cosy small town where it’s always autumn and people actually make a living running a bookshop. It’s awful. You’ll all love it!

I see there is a whole Channel of Christmas films. I tried to settle down and watch a few. No. Really could not do it. Made my diabetes worse!

We happened to have had the sound turned down on the TV the other night while one of these films was on. A high flying career girl with perfect hair had to move back from the evil big city to her small hometown after her Christmas-jumpered Aunty fell off a chair. It was so obvious that it was going to happen even with the sound turned down!!
Of course then we had to turn up the sound and watch the rest of it.

Just watched one today called reindeer lodge. A woman who doesn't enjoy Christmas wins a radio phone in competition to Jamaica, only she doesn't end up in the Caribbean. Gets stuck at reindeer lodge with a guy she doesn't like, but over time they fall for each other. Though there is a few bumps in the road. Has aunt Zelda from Sabrina in it, house full of Christmas decorations, including rows of poinsettias around the bed. Interesting small twist at the end, but they don't expand on it enough.

Oh my god you’re all mad!

But then my husband would quite happily watch Christmas 24 all frigging day if he could, so maybe I’m the mad one

OK. I'm at home today, so I'm watching Christmas Homecoming on Ch5. I missed the first 25 minutes, so I'm not sure what's going on yet. But I'm sure it'll be quite obvious soon!

Oh god, he's playing Silent Night on the guitar. I'm going to start blubbing, it's my favourite Christmas carol!