Do you and your family have your own names for shops and cafes?

[Davespecifico]

It would be funny if you had done the same as ours. We have:
Kitty Shop = H & M
Yoghurt Cafe = Pret a Manger
Jan Loos = John Lewis (in honour of MIL's Smethwick accent).
Blue Cafe = Cafe Nero
Toy Tax = Build a Bear

And yeh wahsmiths

All charity shops are called the chazza

Tacky maxx

Nandos is nandosssss (usually followed by "they have coleslaw in an earthenware pot") as per Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps!
HMV is hummmvvvv
Local corner shop by my parents is called The Little Shop or the Crappy Shopper depending on who you talk to!

River island is just called Rye

Piddles- Lidl

Mcdoh or maccy D'S- McDonald's

Starryb's - Starbucks

Sains mc burys or saino's - Sainsbury's

Teskimo- Tesco

Waggle mammals - Wagamama

Donny most - dominoes

McDonald's - Rotten Ronalds.
(This was actually from DD's nursery keyworker but it's stuck in my head forever more).

MacDonalds=chips corner.

kids loved the French fries and ours is on a corner simples

No idea growing up everyone called the corner shop 'ever bubbles' I'm assuming that's what it was called before it turned to a 'k7 enterprise' god knows!
Ds calls demelza charity shop - toy shop
Corner shop - yellow shop (sign is yellowish)
Maya schlep (polish grocery) he calls Maya the bee shop - it has Maya the bee sticker on its window
Also iceland is the red shop
Superdrug is the baby shop
Pound stretcher is the money shop

Ha ha meglet!

Toddler can't say Costa and pronounces it Custards. We frequent Custards regularly 🤣

Starfucks and WholepaychequeFoods

Debby-Dabs Debenhams
Ham H&M

B&M is Peppa Shop because the first time we went in there DD was about 2 and in the middle of her Peppa Pig obsession. They had an entire aisle of Peppa stuff and her eyes nearly fell out of her head.

Pets At Home was Bunny Shop for awhile. Probably still is, but we haven't been in there for awhile!

Supermarkets were referred to by their colour - Orange Shop (Sainsburys), Blue Shop (Lidl), etc. She knows the names now but I still find myself saying Orange Shop now and then...

TK Maxx is The Max

Makkie Dees - McDonalds
Café BonBon - Pretensions above their station House of Fraser Caff, named in honour of Dinner Ladies
Two For One - Local Marstons Pub where the Two for One sign is actually bigger than the pub name!

Random s added to most shops:

Asdas
Cotscos
Lidls

Etc

Woolworths back in the day was Woolly Woofters

It was acceptable in the 80s...

Sainsbos = Sainsbury’s
Mozzers = Morrison’s
Primarni = primark
Dotty p’s =Dorothy Perkins

River Iceland instead of Island.

I know not why.

Blue cafe = Nero
Red cafe = costa
Chocolate ball shop =M&S

Oh, also called HolyFoods and Starb-sees. WHSmith = Woah-Smiths; The Gap = The Crap; Boots = Bootie-toots; McDonalds = Mac-doh

Crap-op = Co-op (because the one by work is awful)

DS calls Itsu the sticky rice shop.

Ocado is Avocado for me!