To think life is overrated

[dexent]

You're born without having a choice. Then you live a life. Some of it might be good, some of it bad. You might get a lot more of one than the other. Alot of it is out of your hands. You then die. What was the point. This life is so temporary, so fleeting yet we cling on to it so dearly.

Some are born to sweet delight
Some are born to endless night

Life doesn't need to have a point, look at a little ant crawling up a stem, it just exists, like us. But we are lucky enough to have a mind that can appreciate the wonderfulness of this planet.

Some of you might like this great song

I completely agree with @Storm4star

I’m not at all depressed, I enjoy my life. But my life, and all others are essentially futile. We are born, we die, nothing we do matters because this happens to us all. Cheers me up sometimes!

I appreciate life but I find most people a waste of space and time.

If you don’t think you have opportunity living in the UK, despite the universality of human suffering, that is faulty thinking. But yes, agree not a moral issue

You're saying you're failing, yet it's not a moral issue. Saying you should feel lucky basically is saying you are a bad person if you can't feel like that?

I don't think past sufferings justifys giving up but suffering presently doing all the little things people say does warrant a need to be negative from time to time.

It is spectacularly lacking in empathy to dismiss suffering and unhappiness in the UK as 'faulty thinking'.

Tell that to the many, many disabled and/ chronically ill people living in poverty here in the UK unable to afford secure housing or adequately nutritious food, let alone anything higher up on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Not every disabled person has a family who are able to support them physically, emotionally or financially. There are lots of people who living extremely precarious lives with no chance of security or dignity.

Unhappiness in that situation is not faulty fucking thinking - it is a mentally healthy and sane response to a miserable and frightening situation.

A positive attitude is generally a good thing in life. However, it is not emotionally healthy to deny reality in the face of pain or grief or suffering, and cling to what is ultimately a hollow and fragile caricature of positivity.

In general, I find the people who are most keen that everyone embrace positivity (at all costs) are the ones who have a hard time swallowing the more unpalatable truths of the human condition. Overwhelming pain and suffering throws up uncomfortable questions.

That all said, I do think that for a lot of us stupidly fortunate folks - life is indeed a gift. I feel stupidly fortunate because, to date, I've experienced immense suffering - grief and loss - but also experienced great love, fun, excitement and moments of transcendence.

If you can squeeze out pleasure or joy or satisfaction or meaning, it most certainly is a gift in ways. However it is important to remember that we all play the cards we're dealt, and some people are dealt an impossible hand.

It is very human, and categorically NOT 'faulty thinking', to respond with despair when overwhelmed by pain.

That is a victim mentality. Of course the world isn't fair - but what are you going to do about it? Sit and mope all your life?

I...don't think you've understood what I was saying.

AbsentmindedWoman your post is excellent and insightful and the last paragraph sums it up for me.

I’m incredibly fortunate to have had a very good upbringing and life but I have suffered a lot of unhappiness and loss over the last few years, including a myriad of health issues and I now have a chronic drug induced involuntary movement disorder alongside losing my brother last year to cancer at aged 35, and then losing my job.

I can fully agree and appreciate that life is a gift but after having a series of events that have really knocked the stuffing from me, I have had moments when I have been very suicidal. There is no cure for my symptoms of my movement disorder and I do worry how it will affect my future employment prospects. I would consider it a disability in some ways, and can totally agree that some disabled people without the financial and emotional support will find life pretty tough and pointless. I’m lucky I have a good supper network to help soften the blows I have had recently but it could have been a different story if I didn’t.

Not sure what the point to my ramblings are - sorry! It’s been a long day/night and I’m tired! I do think life is so precious and fleeting, and can appreciate all I have, but occasionally I get why it can be tempting to think it is pointless and how I can’t go on struggling forever.

*support network! Stupid autocorrect! 🤣

I agree with pp, we are just hamsters on a wheel. Although I think hamsters on a conveyor belt is more accurate. We all fall off it at some point.

I do struggle to see the point of it all.

You can have a great upbringing. You may have no real problems. You may read every self-help book going. You may chant positive mantras. You may try really hard to retrain your brain.

No matter what anyone says about appreciating the first spring blossom or the first walk in Autumn leaves - you CAN enjoy these things and feel a sense of malade all the time and hate yourself for it, especially every time you see people suffering from illness or people who are living in extreme poverty or war-torn countries.

Only people with brains wired this way will understand. You may force the smiles in work and laugh along with everyone else and force jollity while feeling like you’re drowning, without knowing where that water is coming from.

Life is great if you’re one of the lucky ones with money, opportunities, health, friends, etc. But if you’re one of the unlucky ones (ie the majority) then it sucks - it’s nothing but pain, fear and drudgery.

Well, this is the problem for atheists, isn’t it? They think this life is all there is, and then struggle to find any point to it.
They’re rather like caterpillars, bemoaning their dull existence chewing leaves and crawling in mud, and wailing that they all just go into their chrysalis and die.
While above their heads, unseen, are the beautiful butterflies of their afterlife, sipping nectar, flying in the sunlight and shagging their brains out!
Religious belief makes a lot more sense of this life as merely a precursor to escaping from time, space and mortality to be in the loving presence of God for eternity.

They’re rather like caterpillars, bemoaning their dull existence chewing leaves and crawling in mud, and wailing that they all just go into their chrysalis and die

Utter crap. I'm an atheist who loves life and being alive. Being and atheist arguably makes you appreciate life more and make the most of it. Beats having to rely on a fairy story to see meaning in life.

Religion was invented so the unwashed masses would put up with having shit lives in the hope of a glorious afterlife.

Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

I enjoy my life, but there are parts I don't like - namely work and getting up at 6am, neither suit me.

I feel like my life should be a bit better than it is with more money, time and friends. I always have hope that it will get better in the future, no real plan though.

I have often pondered why some people are optimistic and some pessimistic and wonder if that affects people's view of living.
Like other pp, I have had an awful childhood, mother dying when I was born, abuse of every kind by the people supposed to be looking after me. Homeless and pregnant at 16. However, I was not always miserable and never wanted to be dead. I just wanted life to get better.
It did as soon as I had my first child. Then through hard work, determination, good support from goverenment agencies and helpful people my life became great. For years I lived in extreme poverty, but had a council flat so I was safe and warm.
I've always been an optimist and get real pleasure from small things, the moon, stars, sunset. Even washing up, I love it when little bubbles explode out of the bottle, it cheers me up every time!
I'm at home waiting for the hospital to ring to confirm a possible end of life diagnosis for my lovely husband. We are both over 60 and would very much like to live for many more years.
This post sounds like I'm bragging but I'm not, I genuinely puzzle over why some people love life -regardless of what it throws at them and others don't.

@Mygrandchildrenrock I suspect some of your lifelong optimism is from a sense of agency. A sense of being able to make changes that result in good outcomes and a better future.

You mention hard work, help from governmental agencies, and supportive people in your life.

I'd argue that nearly everyone is striving and working hard in their own way to get by - but PRODUCTIVE work that improves circumstances needs a certain amount of physical stamina, cognitive ability, lack of mental illness that significantly impacts on daily living and the choices you make, and good old executive function. Not everyone has enough of these things.

It's sheer luck if you're born or remain reasonably able-bodied and healthy, with a brain that can navigate the structures of our society.

It's sheer luck if you had 'enough' of a positive relationship with a caregiver as a child to allow you to form healthy relationships as an adult - not just romantic, but with friends and a wider community who enrich your life and open doors to further resources.

n general, I find the people who are most keen that everyone embrace positivity (at all costs) are the ones who have a hard time swallowing the more unpalatable truths of the human condition. Overwhelming pain and suffering throws up uncomfortable questions

Not true for me at all. I love being alive. I don’t find it pointless. I find it desperately sad that many I have loved are dead. I don’t want to die- this doesn’t make me struggle with the human condition at all. It makes me more aware of our brevity and the beauty that is life.

Well, this is the problem for atheists, isn’t it? They think this life is all there is, and then struggle to find any point to it.

Nope, I’m a life loving atheist.

AbsentmindedWoman I know what you mean about 'sheer luck' and although I have always been mentally healthy I certainly didn't have a caregiver who did anything but abuse me until I left at 16.
I knew it was 'sheer luck' that I had been born in the UK rather than a war torn country, or one where people were struggling with lack of food and water. I remember thinking that when I was about 8 yrs old.
I also knew I hadn't done anything to deserve the abuse I was getting and I and knew it would stop as soon as I was old enough to leave.
I still don't know why I felt this though and why I have always been a positive person.

AbsentmindedWoman is nailing it in her posts