Golden Wonder: I say Tayto , you say Tahto, when will she call the whole thing off?!

[KimmySchmidtsSmile]

Thread two

Calvin throwing shade
Stupid Buzzeed expresion.

Why is Jude dressed like a painter and decorator?

They need to step it up. I never thought I'd say this but I am getting bored. It must be time for a different location and maybe tea with TayTay's Great-Aunt Jemima?!

There is no Great-Aunt Jemima. I made her up

It's not fair. I had to work today, and none of my colleagues are TayTo-ites. So I was needing a fix, and needing it bad.

But a quick check in with gossip websites my spies tells me that... Air Force TayTo has left Rome, stopped off at London Luton and is now heading over the Atlantic.

Ha he been dropped off for Toto Solo @ Wimbo? Has the love train run out of steam?
And where is Luke? Emma Watson had some non-stories in the SBOS today, so maybe he has been attending to her instead?

Yeah, painter and decorator or Andy Pandy on the piss.

What do we know though ? He's described as "channeling laid back holiday vibes". I think that's bollock speak for threw on the first thing out of the suitcase.

throwing shade

ffs. Is it SO awful to speak English?

(dig at buzzfeed btw, not you Coco )

So the National Enquirer are saying all the Enty blinds are right: they were both cheating. Calvin with a bevy of beauties (as the DM would call them) and Ta with To.

I presume Calvin was with someone else when he crashed the car?

Hang on, there might be a SoLoToToWimBo??

WTAF?

Or, or, or they could have picked up ToToMumMu.... no this isn't working.

Are they picking up his mum from Luton and taking her with? Why stop at Luton? WHO GOT ON AND OFF THAT PLANE???

I must know.

Nice work Zebra. Maybe they're going to the Caribbean ? Or maybe they're doing what real people do who've just met, i.e spend a lot of time in private together (obviously I know that last bit's not very likely!!)

You can't tease the world by being the most unlikely unconvincing couple, being papped 24/7, then just disappear. This thread has rights, and a very good lawyer, I hope TayTo are aware of that.

(Flounces off with no sideboob to go to the supermarket)

just caught up on the last million couple of pages.
So they're not in Rome, or at Wimbledon?
They're still in lurrrrve
Calvin has been throwing shade (I love celeb shade throwing almost As much as I love celeb Twitter fights)

There is a whole tumblr site dedicated to some mystery man who lurks behind TH. I dare not look at Tumblr, I lost a whole weekend last time I got sucked in thanks Larry

I'm sure I read on some blind site or Twitter that the driver of calvins car was someone he shouldn't have been with. Hence the sudden break up. Can't remember where I read it though and can't be bothered to google again. And it could be a big fat lie.

SoloToWimbo Make it happen Tayto !!

Oh Em Gee.
Maybe Taytay is off to find Calvin and his bevy of beauties and kick them all overboard?
TayTo seemed to beaten a hasty retreat as soon as Brush Strokes Law landed in Rome.

Was Jude throwing shade in Rome? Genuine question, I don't understand this shade business....

Yes apparently re the Calvin car crash there were drugs and an unsuitable companion. The bevy of beauties are shooting a music video with him so I think they're a red herring.

Ive liked Totos facebook page, for research only you understand.

Is this the bodyguards? Awkwardddd.
"Bert, Ernie, please look away while me and my lover who I love, indulge in some light canoodling".

That photo is ridiculous do you think the moved to the gap so the photographer wouldn't miss anything?

Calvin Harris doesn't drink and I'm pretty sure he doesn't do drugs.

Tumblr, blind site, Twitter etc. I've learnt more about social media on this thread since last Thursday than I could ever have imagined.

I'm usually a lurker and poster on AIBU or Relationships (with the occasional foray into gardening and house keeping - god I'm boring !).

To think you've all been here slebbing all along.

So, even if TayTo go TitsUp at Wimbo, or MumToTo blows the whistle on Lulu and ToTo, it's been an education.

(We may need to steal the Enigma machine for decoding purposes if we reach Thread 3)

There has been plane activity? Hasn't Jude been spending a lot of time in Italy filming his new TV show? Nice of him to mop up the paps.

I like to think one of the bouncers was checking to make sure all the paparazzi were in place Don't start yet,TayTay, some kids have stood in front of the National Enquirer
And the other was timing the PDA And cut! That's the 5 mins kissing PDA ticked off for this afternoon. Next one scheduled for 2100hrs in a restaurant

That pic of Tayto with the bodyguards is classic. I'm getting second-hand embarrassment for them (a new phrase I've learned today from my niece who is the only other person IRL who seems interested in Tayto. What have I become?!

They are getting rather dreary now Mitzy I agree. If the lovely Lulu is still looking after ToTo and hiding out behind closed curtains whilst furiously scouring the internet for mentions of his beloved client - Lulu make something happen will you, there's a doll.

I'll just leave this here - incase you're unsure of what's going on, the DM helpfully explains that he's showering her with affection. He's very attached to that quilted jacket - didn't even take it off for dinner.

Maybe I'm an old cynic but overly romantic men give me the creeps.

Agree - ime overly romantic men are hiding either no personality or arsehole tendencies

it's like he's reading from a romance textbook.

Oh god yeah. Although in that last picture he looks so bored and like he's just holding her hand against his face. So romantic, not.