The Gisborne Institute of Broadsword Polishing and Leather Lustering

[SupermassiveLBD]

Motto: Honi soit qui mal y pense

Master Classes available in:

Smouldering
Stompy boot wearing
Pointy weapon waving, and the effective deployment thereof
Exotic equestrianism
Imperatives
and The cause and alleviation of damsels' distress (Godwyves also welcome)

::Staggers in::

Evening all.

That pudding looks amazing, Spiro. Your friends are very lucky - mine would get compote de fruits Del Monte avec son coulis Carnation.

Sorry to hear you didn't sleep, Massive. That Frank has a lot to answer for.

Hope you're enjoying your mini-break, Twiggy ::thinks of Bridget Jones and the awful Daniel:: and your holiday, Small. .

Oh and, LadyDamerel, don't diss the king. Mr Rochester as played by dear Toby is my second-greatest literary adaptation crush after, oh, I forget his name. And there is nothing of the pomme de terre about him, thank you very much.

Oh that vid was such fun, Maud. I'd not seen that before. such a lovely smile in some of the shots.

at your elegant dessert menu.

That reminds me. We always used to laugh when we saw ''assiette anglaise'' on a menu in la belle France, because it referenced Cockney rhyming slang so cleverly, and we couldn't decide if it was deliberate or not.

Well, as you know I am a very great cook. My haricots blancs dans leur coulis de tomates avec ses toasts are legendary.

I thought I might have linked to that vid before. It's the only thing that comes up on a search for The Man + holiday. I wanted to link to Bridget Jones and her mini-break with Daniel but it required a version of Adobe I don't have.

How goes it?

Oh, I do love menu French in France. As opposed to menu French in England.

I am fine but viewing the world as if from behind one of Gizzy's spare helmets with the visor locked down -- my eyes are swollen so I only have a couple of slits to look out of...

It's strain brought on by looking too hard at Gizzy pics late at night.

By that I meant menu French in poncey restaurants, of course; not inspired inventions by Academy colleagues, as so ably demonstrated above.

'Salright. No offence taken.

::wonders whether to accept that explanation for Massive's tiredness and counts the number of empty bottles of Fizzy Gizzy and discarded tubs of Duraglit in the recycling bin::

Snap with the eyes, Massive. I had an allergic reaction after rubbing my eyes while chopping parsnips for dinner and I look like I've been ten rounds with Mike Tyson. They are delightfully swollen, bright red and the eyeball itself has that weird clear membrane swelling thing going on .

The MiniDs kept looking like at me over dinner and I fear my legendary beauty may currently be a trifle marred.

Oh poor LadyD, that sounds gruesome painful. Have you had it before? I hope it goes away soon.

I think mine may be allergic too but I can't put my finger on what might have caused it.

Other than Duraglit fumes.

Eek, LadyDamerel. That sounds grim, but I'm sure your beauty will soon be restored to the legendary levels which so entranced dear, dear Jasper.

::wistful recollection of our time together on a French divan::

I have myriad ridiculous allergies that have developed over the last couple of years. The eye thing normally happens with grass and I didn't think parsnips were on my 'avoid' list but that's the only thing it could have been.

Maybe you should lay off the Duraglit, for a bit then? Stick to buffing up his leather instead?

Stick to buffing up his leather instead

I suppose where your health is concerned, you have to make a few sacrifices

::And on a Sunday evening too::

Oh, was that rood? I didn't notice...

Muse live at 10.20 on BBC 2!!

You do, Massive.

I noticed when I was taking them off at the party on Monday that some of the ties down the sides of his trousers seem a trifle worn. I have no idea how that may have happened - all the friction whilst riding Richie, perhaps? - but you may want to consider replacing them.

Oh fab, Small. I am watching the David Hare spy thing now so will get ready to play air guitar straight after that.

Have been meaning to ask, LadyD, whether you will be watching the Age of Regency, with your vinaigrette at the ready?

Could well be friction, LadyD as he does quite a bit of riding. Either that or he's always in too much hurry to get them off or someone else is

Thank you, Mr Thornton

Oh, Muse! 'Snot fair. I wanna see them too!

Well, there is always YT.

You know we have , Massive.

I certainly will be, Maud. I have been eagerly awaiting the transmission for over a sennight now.

(The woman seems quite irritating in the adverts though, I'm hoping she grows on me).

Massive, he does quite a bit of riding, does he? Is that the equine version or the version?

In one way, even better Maudie.

Oh, he is magnificent

We only have visual evidence of the equine version, LadyD. The other may only be wishful thinking.

I think she's marvellous. Did you see her series on English homes a while back?

And yes, Massive, he is very fine indeed even if he would look better with a cravat.