I'm a single mum of 7. AMA!

[WorldCupSadness]

Scared 😅

You do need the taxpayer though, male and female.

What is actually wrong with people? So much seething anger that goes way beyond opinion.

If this thread isn’t some sort of wind up, it’s certainly tabloid anti benefit culture fodder . I haven’t rtft but do these 4 men contribute anything towards the upkeep of their dc?
infuriating reading for those who have limited the size of their families to what they feel they can affird

Yeah. But she has them. What’s your plan for them? They have every right to a good life regardless of choices made by their parents.

I roll my eyes every time a certain type of parent has another child, with another partner. But you need to separate the two.

There are lots of things the OP has that seem fortunate - healthy babies, benefit support and a certain ability, or desire, to see the positive in where she is at - but I still do not believe she has been the careful architect of every decision and circumstance that has placed her where she is.

It's ok to discuss issues, but try just scrolling fast through the later pages on this thread and imagine being the op.

How is your mental health? Do any of your children have disabilities or health problems? Do you ever feel sorry for tthe older ones?

OP what is the point of this thread?

Eldest of 8.

dont you dare make any of your older kids raise your younger ones.

it’s selfish and you cannot possibly meet the needs of all of them.

This is so infuriating to read. I’d love more than one child but despite our household being net contributors tax wise we don’t feel we can give more than one child the lifestyle they deserve. We get zero funding for childcare, benefit etc etc. you’ve had 7 by multiple men (maybe try being single/celibate for a while?!)) and get OVER £4K in benefits every month? Are you not ashamed? I don’t for one minute believe you are actually studying law whilst working 21 hours and raising 7 kids. Stop looking for validation in the internet and sort out contraception and stop looking to the state to support your lifestyle choices. You wouldn’t have had 7 kids without UC, so why do you feel entitled for others to pay for them?!

Rage bait?

There comes a time in life where you have to take responsibility. It’s called being an adult. Especially when seven children depend on you. OP must be incredibly naive if she thought that this wouldn’t rile people up. People are sick of being taken advantage of by others who expect the state to subsidise their questionable life choices.

Hey - higher rate tax payers here. You are exactly the kind of person I hope my tax is supporting. Maybw we'll meet one day in the board room when you're qualified as a solicitor!

@WorldCupSadness my dad was one of 17 children ( catholics ) his family home was immaculate .

As a higher tax payer I am surprised that someone who relies almost exclusively on benefits can afford a cleaner when my budget won’t stretch to it.

I completely agree that there has to be a safety net so the vulnerable folks in our society have a roof over their head and food on the table. Every child deserves a decent quality of life. Howeever, we do bet the question the system when benefits can find a lifestyle that most on society who work can’t afford. And a cleaner is a luxury that most of us can’t reach.

You get £4k a month with UC are you serious? That’s more than I earn working full time in a corporate role. Isn’t there a benefit cap?

I doubt the op is coming back but I'd like to ask what was your reason for having so many children? Who did you do it for? Yourself to fulfil some fantasy of a large happy family or for all those children you've brought into the world who will no doubt not be able to have the same experiences that smaller families can enjoy (after school clubs, holidays, days out, meals out etc).

My brother in law has 6 children with his ex-wife. Those kids are now young adults and none of them had many positive experiences growing up because money was tight. They grew up on top of each other in a 4 bed house with little personal space. As children they couldn't wait to come and stay the night at my sister's house so they could have some space and time to themselves.

The reason why most of us chose to only have one or two children is for the children, not ourselves. Many people would like lots of kids but we also know when to stop. Quality over quantity and all that!

I personally think it's really quite selfish to have so many children, unless if course you are very rich with enough space for each child to thrive and enough money for them to have experiences.

It's £132k gross.

I think this is a total wind up by the OP, who has not returned since page 11. The whole thread has been self sustaining by MN posters.

How have you had time to meet and have kids with 4 different men whilst already having kids?

@WorldCupSadness did you miss my question? Thanks

Good on ya for having the balls to face some of the venom on here OP, it takes more balls than being a single mum to 7 children! Haha

Actually, if she didn't work at all she'd be benefit capped. Which is what? £15k outside of London? Might have gone up a bit.

Same here Summerrevival. I am horrified this is allowed to happen.

Well, people were equally infuriated by the 2 child cap, though if you had one disabled child it didn’t apply. Children shouldn’t be raised in poverty but they should be raised within their parents means, otherwise tax payers are funding a lifestyle they can never hope to afford without benefits and eventually the system will be bankrupt.
Back in yesteryear women had to give up children if they could not afford them. I wonder if OP is from the care system, hence the many kids.
OP you should consider yourself fortunate that you live in these so called enlightened times but I cannot help but think support to manage your need to reproduce would serve you and your children better than handouts.

Quite, as you say she’d need to earn c £115-£120k Pa to take home what she does. As a salary this would put her in the top 3% of wage earners in the country.