I was in prison in my early twenties, AMA

[Lexibletheflexible]

I was in prison about 18 years ago, between the ages of 19-22. I now volunteer with charities supporting female prisoners. AMA

Yes I know that. But when you do

Well a prison charity kind of wants people who know what prison is like. Someone who wouldn't even date a person who has seen the inside of a cell aren't going to be much use to fulfil that kind of role, if you think about it.

So if they didn't accept anyone with a criminal record, they'd not be as helpful as they are to prisoners. They'd have to wait for people who were either found not guilty but were on remand or people who had verdicts overturned on appeal.

That is not what I said

I said I am surprised that as a part of your charity volunteer role they don’t require a DBS

for safeguarding purposes

Yeah so you prep for that via saving and investments. It's partly why we have the gap we have between oldest and the younger ones. We save and invest for those things over our retirement which we've not given as much priority at this time. We will have to focus on that at some point but we wont starve or be homeless so will be fine.

So back to my point… your job as a cleaner must be more of a hobby

Yes but if it is a charity that supports prisoners, don't you think they'd be kind of useless if no ex prisoners could volunteer? Oh do you mean just doing the process? Then yes. I assumed you meant a "clean" DBS. Yes I have had a DBS for my role of course. They know I was convicted of possession of a firearm and nothing else!

I don’t think you understand what a DBS is

it doesn’t mean that if you have a criminal record you can’t volunteer

It is identifying the type of crime you committed

No, it earns real money that we spend on real things. I pay for all our luxuries like holidays etc. If I didnt clean, then we wouldnt go away much or eat out very often etc. I enjoy the work, though.

Wait so now you’re saying you do have a DBS?

Or are you saying your client didn’t take you on because your DBS wasn’t clean?

How many hours a week do you work as a cleaner? And what’s your hourly rate?

I suppose I am more used to talking about a DBS in terms of whether it is going to be obstructive to your role/ is it "clean"?. Most jobs/voluntary work require that you go through the process.

Sorry just to be clear - you do have a DBS? It’s just obviously not “clean”, right?

Have your kids told their friends? Do they ask questions about it?

Depends on my week.

I charge between £15-£20ph for regular work. Other jobs are priced by the job. I try to earn about £100 per day on average. Some days it is much more for a bigger job, but then I might take a day or 2 off as it is obviously physically demanding. It's paid to our business.

Last week I think I cleaned for 35hrs in total. It felt like a hard week.

Would you think that one of the prisoners you volunteer with getting pregnant just after she got out of prison in a brand-new relationship is an incredibly bad idea?

Yes i did need to complete the process for my role. So I have one with my convictions on it.

My oldest has told some of his friends. They havent asked questions. My kids have. Mostly the 2 eldest. I tell my kids so nobody else does and they get confused or worried or something. My son asked if I was a prison wife or had one when he was about 13.

And with 4 children
and with a very successful business
wow - you must really love cleaning!

Depends on the prisoner. I was in my own private rented flat with an income. So in a better situation than many other women, especially at my age, who conceive. Partner could have left me and I'd have been totally fine.

I think coming from a WC background, you're a bit more resilient to having to crack on yourself in less than ideal situations. Most women I know were either single mothers, or not with the father of their first child and had time as a single parent. The women I knew had always had to work alongside doing most of the childcare and housework. They weren't working to keep their foot in the door of their lucrative career or so they had some other identity than mum/wife, they were doing it to put some food in the table.

So in the grand scale of things, I had nothing to worry about. I had enough money, a place to live, a loving, supportive, local family and a committed partner. That is more than a lot of women, even those with no criminal record, a degree and a budding career.

My husband does most of the work in our business. It is mostly centered around his expertise. As I've said, I do enjoy my work. I wouldn't do a job that I didn't enjoy, would you?

I wouldn’t no

then again with 4 kids and a successful business - I wouldn’t be pulling 35 hour weeks cleaning other people’s homes. Each to their own

Was social Services involved with your first pregnancy?

Are you really careful about declaring your earning to HMRC and paying correct tax given history?

Well then we wouldn't be able to hsve the luxuries that we enjoy through my earnings as all the money earned would be wrapped up in the sensible necessities. It would lower our quality of life. I don't work as much as a lot of people. I Choose all my clients and my working schedule. I never work on weekends or later than 6pm. Mostly never later than 4pm. I couldn't sit at home all day when all my kids are at school or working. Could you?

Yes for a short time. Then they signed me off before baby was actually born.

Yes, it is paid to the business. We are totally legit in terms of our work and earnings.

Again no I couldn’t

but there is a middle ground between sitting at home all day ….

and working 35 hour weeks cleaning other people’s toilets when you have 4 children of your own and a financially successful business

but each to their own as I say

Sorry leaving for work!

It's more glamorous than it seems. Most jobs don't offer the flexibility that I have. Plus you deal with many other issues in the workplace, especially as a woman.