My boys go to a prestigious boarding school. Ask me anything !

[tummyduck]

Ask me anything about my boys who board at an all boys’ school ! Any disrespectful questions will be ignored

Given it’s school holidays, why aren’t you spending every precious minute with them, when you could have started this thread in September?

The school holidays are actually quite relevant to this thread……🙄

a joint decison but very much normal in the school and community we are in
they like it

You know that Malala Yusafzai ended up at a pretty prestigious private girls’ school in this country, yes? Not boarding but still.

Most kids won’t go to school with Syrian refugees or Roma migrants at state schools either.

He works in the military

weird. Do your kids not hang out with one another/friends?

Yes, I know Malala's story. I'm guessing you don't need to have it pointed out that her case was somewhat exceptional.
You have missed my point, really.

Ah so the taxpayer is paying for it!

Ahhhhh (have ex military in the family here) so you’re sending them to a top school for peanuts at the expense of the UK taxpayers, whilst being a trailing wife because if you stayed at home you wouldn’t qualify.

I believe accidentally

Malala was a massive exception! She was famous. I would imagine schools were queuing up to offer her a place.

And where I live (a provincial city) there are refugee children in every school.

Oops - I tell a lie. They’re not in every school they’re in every STATE school.

And also explains the choice of a boarding school as a day school would not be paid for.

And what do you do that you couldn't do in this country?

Nope, they’re at work right now.

Just awful. Why do military families get these taxpayer funded perks.

Any drug use risks there - what’s the parents’ feeling? Also are there any day pupils and might you have a feeling if they are a minority and feel like outsiders?(Do your boys say, for example, that boarders and day pupils do not mix)? Finally (sorry!) might I ask if you have a feeling about co-ed vs single sex? Thank you

The thing is, that children who go to boarding school are psychologically affected and develop a thing called boarding school syndrome. They have to go into survival mode because they're away from their family and have no truly safe and private space, so of course most children tell their families 'I love it!!'. It's part of the psychological adaptation. They have to believe everything is ok because it's too risky for their young brains and emotional systems to believe anything else. This phenomenon is well studied and documented.

We are considering schooling options at the moment so thanks for doing this thread. DC is an only and at a boarding prep as a day pupil. As we approach latter years more and more board and then move onto boarding senior schools at 13. We are considering out best path. One parent boarded but it wasn't a happy experience and otherwise boarding is not a tradition in our family. Do you think boarding is worth it for the child and that the public schools are worth it? We are considering pulling DC out of the prep at aged 10 and sending to a decent day school that has a senior school attached. Beyond 10 the prep is majority boarding and would hate DC to be left out. DC is happy to board but leaving school at 13 would be difficult for then moving to a day school. We can afford to move on to a senior boarding school but we live and work in the UK and wonder whether its worth the huge fees. Many thanks

gosh so much projection.

I am guessing you have given no thought to what will happen later in life

My DH has always joked that he looks forward to the time when he can repay the favour. When his Father (for it was he who mandated boarding aged 7) becomes infirm and wants us to help care for him, he can then say that he is sending him to a lovely place where there are lots of people his own age and he will have a really super time, it doesn't matter that he isn't at home being cared for by his family as it will be SO GREAT.

Well he says it's a joke.

How do you do this without spending proper time with them? You learn through your home environment and peers. You are neither so I really can't see how much of an impact you can make on shaping their future self's.

I'm sorry, I'm trying to be very balanced. But I just cannot see how parents can say they raised their children, when it's like just visiting someone occasionally.

Also, I don't believe with what you've said about it being the norm in your husbands family, that they would be as forward in telling you if they were unhappy.

Hi, for our boys they have thrived. They have made the most of the co-curricular, sports and academics. They have lovely friends and their school are big on community initiatives and charity work. Not all Public schools are equal- some are awful

Is it Hogwarts?

If it makes you feel better.

As a PP said, there's a whole board on private education.

How do I define myself as their mother? i guess i am and I do instill my values. Teachers are not parents

It is called AMA. This is the board I chose.