My DS wants to be a girl

[UndertheCedartree]

Not a situation I imagined being in. But he has wanted to be a girl for 4 years now. He's 17 and autistic.

I've just looked back and it's because I've brought my DC the same as you and you don't like not looking superior in having been so good at bringing yours up that they have never questioned their gender.

How does she/he afford to pay for this? Private health care is expensive and I would assume these drugs are too.

I have no idea what 'hoping for some screen shots even means'!

At the end of the day I started a AMA for people to ask questions if they chose to. Noone is being forced to be on this thread if they don't find the answers interesting enough or whatever.

Gender doesn’t actually exist. It’s made up. Kids who aren’t confused don’t even consider it.

She works.

The point being I have brought my DC up in the way this poster says they have brought their child up in and the reason why they claim their child is not questioning their gender.

Gender does exist - it is a social construct.

I suggest you watch two things the interview between Chloe Cole and Jordan Peterson and also visit the website of billboard Chris and listen to the statistics and his interviews with some autistic transitioners. Both explain a lot .

personally I would encourage him to be as individual as he wants as a young male but be careful about being too accepting in case he gets groomed on line . IMO .

Yes, a social invention. Like FatherChristmas and the tooth fairy. It's bullshit.

Its as real as unicorns.

i think a person can be a feminine male or a masculine female and express themselves that way . Individualism should be encouraged anyway. But the reasons a young person may feel they want to change sex are normally much deeper . I would hate him to be led down the wrong path because perhaps he feels he does not fit in .

Dd17 with Asd and ADHD has been saying she wants to be a boy for the past few years. It all to do with not fitting in has a girl she believes her life would be better/worth living if she was a boy.
No matter how much I tell her she will never be a biological boy she don't care she just wants to live has a boy.

She has had therapy and the therapist said that it's really common for people with ASD to want to change sex.

What does his dad think?

I understand you want to be supportive and always "have his back". But sometimes honesty is the more loving way forward, and actually helping people come to terms with reality and who they are is more helpful than just affirming their feelings. For decades this was the goal of therapy, to help align people's minds with the reality and not bolster their delusions. Affirmative care is a very recent phenomenon and I don't believe there's any evidence that it actually benefits anyone.

What's your definition of transphobia?

Thank you, I'll have a look.

Well I want to 26 and slim. Equally impossible.

I agree, but society as a whole doesn't. Plenty of people don't think boys should have long hair or wear dresses.

Not really. Noone believes in unicorns. Plenty believe boys shouldn't have long hair or wear dresses.

This trend really needs to stop. These poor kids

Neither having long hair or wearing a particular item of clothing determines a persons sex or gender though, does your DS think it does? Do you?

I don't know that he does feel he wants to change sex. Maybe he does or maybe he just would like to express himself in a more feminine way but for some reason feels he can't. He's not expressed any deep reasons to me. I would also. However, he does seem very settled and happy now. That wasn't necessarily the case some years ago. He has a few really nice friends that he really seems to fit in with.

There definitely is a connection with ASD. I hope your DD can find some peace as herself.

He knows nothing about it.

Yes. But the correct response to society's prejudice is to fight it. For women to power lift, men to become nurses. Not for perfect healthy young people to turn on themselves. Reminds me of anorexia so much - the social pressure on women turned into self loathing and starvation.