Hello, I'm a TRA - ask me anything

[AlphaTransWoman]

Good evening,

I'm a transgender rights advocate. I say "advocate" rather than "activist" because I believe in constructive debate and consensus building rather than the hostile, shouty kind of activism that gets us nowhere.

I am here because I am genuinely interested in seeing if there is some kind of compromise that can be reached between pro trans and gender critical views. Obviously this is difficult because we may disagree about something pretty fundamental. I feel passionately that trans women are women (at least in the psychological and social sense), so there's an obvious divide if you do not.

The question is, can we find ways to co-exist and find an acceptable way forward on some of the difficult issues that arise around trans acceptance? So I'm happy to have a go answering anything you care to ask in good faith. Who knows, we might even make some progress.

Have you prepared by reading all the prior threads like this from other posters? They appear on a regular basis and it might pre-alert you to some of the FAQs and familiar answers.

I feel passionately that trans women are women (at least in the psychological and social sense), so there's an obvious divide if you do not.

I’m interested in hearing you go into further detail about this.

When I was a teenager, I thought a man who ‘grew up in the wrong body’ would transition and be recognised as a transwoman. I thought it was more about being ‘acknowledged’ as a woman and being able to feel that they were in the right body. So they knew that they were still biologically still a man but would live as a woman (whatever that means.)

It’s only now in recent years that I’ve realised that the majority (or possibly all) transwoman believe that they are actually a woman. How can that be? Surely transwomen can understand that they aren’t actually real women? Seeing as they were born as a man? I really don’t understand that at all

When you say “gender specific” did you mean sex specific? Better to use clear language.

If you don’t feel safe or comfortable in the facilities provided for your sex, then by all means campaign for your own spaces. That’s what women did and then disabled campaigners as both groups recognized that the facilities available did not meet their needs.

But any time women suggest third spaces, they are shouted down and told it’s “othering”. Also we are asked how we are going to keep male people out as we can’t stop them.

Why isn't there more focus on supporting other men to support and welcome males who prefer to present in traditionally female clothing. Eg so that transwomen feel more comfortable and safe in all male spaces

Not sure what this has got to do with the topic under discussion. I'm sure the OP is aware of this. The OP has specifically come here to engage with GC women on this topic.

I'm still hoping to learn what the psychological and social characteristics of women are, that all women share

hoping the OP will come back and answer

I think it's fair to say that third spaces are the preferred option for most feminists. Particularly with toilets women don't want to lose all single sex provision (though in some builings separate cubicals may be the only practical solution) because they are used for more than just going to the loo.

@AlphaTransWoman two questions:

1. Do you think that everyone who describes themselves as a woman is automatically a woman? e.g. Is a rapist with a full beard who decided to 'identify' yesterday just as much of a woman as a post op transsexual who spent years making the decision with medical support.
2. You seem to accept that transwomen are not biologically women? Should they be allowed to compete in women's sports despite their inherent advantages?

I’m wondering if the OP really meant we could ask them anything - or was just identifying as someone who did.

Hopefully they’ll come back soon and respond to all the v pertinent questions.

If transwomen really believe that they are really women, even if it's only in the 'psychological and social sense', why are they not more outraged that transwomen are trampling over biological women's sex-based rights?

And if transwomen believe that they are only really women in the psychological and social sense, why are they not campaigning harder to keep other transwomen out of areas where biology matters- women's rape centres, sports, and so on?

I think the OP was probably just here for screen grabs and this is less an AMA and more Admiral Ackbar.

OK, I'll talk about third spaces first. I'm strongly in favour of these.

As a trans woman, I hate using female only spaces because I know that my body looks male and that is going to be a huge problem for other women. So I simply can't use changing rooms full stop, unless there happens to be a gender neutral option, and I only use women's toilets if absolutely necessary, always using the accessible toilet if available.

What I can't do is share facilities with men. As a woman, it would be profoundly humiliating for me to do so and put me at risk of assault. So if you are supportive of the idea of third spaces we are probably on the same side.

Third spaces have offered and rejected, as they're not validating. There was a race recently set up for this reason and no one entered.

@AlphaAlphaTransWoman What is your opinion on men that say they identify as women to go into women's toilets, raid the sanitary bin, then stick used tampons in their anus?

I apologise OP, we cross posted!

If you feel the way you do about using men’s spaces, do you understand why women don’t want men in ours?

Excellent - now you’ve shared your views on third spaces (a solution which has been rejected by other TIM) can you respond to the many other questions please.

I agree - and a lot of it also links to gender roles.
If a man's reason for 'feeling like a woman' means he likes dresses and girly things.. that does not make him a woman.
Just like how a woman who likes cars , Lego and other 'manly' things is still a woman.

OK, but how would you feel about third spaces for transgender women? Or a choice between gender specific and gender neutral facilities (eg toilets)?

Pretty sure GC women have been campaigning for that since forever, only for TRA to get the right hump because that's not what they want.

Why can’t you use the men’s toilet and why are you using the disabled toilets?

What I can't do is share facilities with men. As a woman, it would be profoundly humiliating for me to do so and put me at risk of assault.

^ I feel exactly the same way OP. Hence I don't want to share facilities with transwomen either.

I am supportive of third spaces when they don't take away from single sex provision for women. Unfortunately they often do. Women are already at a disadvantage to men when we have equal provision with them, because we tend to take much longer using the loo than they do.

What I can't do is share facilities with men. As a woman, it would be profoundly humiliating for me to do so and put me at risk of assault. So if you are supportive of the idea of third spaces we are probably on the same side.
The irony of this statement, whilst explaining why a male bodied person is using the women's toilet 🤯

This.

What I can't do is share facilities with men. As a woman, it would be profoundly humiliating for me to do so and put me at risk of assault. So if you are supportive of the idea of third spaces we are probably on the same side.

ahhhh

it's a forced teaming expedition

Can you clarify - if the third space is for transwomen, where would transmen go?

And what about people who have no gender ?

and put me at risk of assault

So you can’t put yourself at risk so biological women will just have to deal with the risk that transwomen bring about? Why don’t transwomen spend their time advocating for mens spaces to be safer for transwomen to access?

Why does it have to be, ‘well they don’t want me over there so I’ll have to come over here?’ That’s another thing I don’t understand