I’m a vicar: ask me anything!

[Holyannie]

Hello,

I’m a Church of England vicar in a semi-rural context. Ask me anything! (Weddings, funerals, Christenings or anything about what a vicar does day to day). 🙂

Do you have to go for tea and cake at your regulars' houses all the time, or is that something we see on TV that doesn't really happen? I'm not sure if home visits are part of the job.

I actually do! Pastoral visits are really important because there are a lot of lonely/grieving people around who want to chat. Unfortunately when life gets busy with other things this is often the first thing that gets squeezed out so I often feel guilty I’m not doing enough of this.

What’s the most difficult thing about your role?

I’m not a Christian but the vicar who led my local congregation until recently was so lovely, warm and pragmatic that I felt very comfortable participating in church life when it was appropriate.

Do you believe in hell? And if so who do you believe goes to hell?

Sorry if that's a heavy question. I don't believe in God and I can't force myself to but part of me worries there is an afterlife.

Does the taking the kids to church to get into the "right" schools hypocrisy wind you up?

Thanks for the question! Like a lot of jobs in modern life (and teaching was the same because I used to be a teacher before I was ordained) I find the bureaucracy and initiatives from the Diocese to be the stressful bit because it takes time and focus away from what we should be doing on the ground. Finances and keeping an old building running are also a big time and energy drain. Mostly things with people I love. Even times with people that are really difficult or tragic because I think hopefully I helped them at a hard time in their lives.

Are you in a typical CofE parish with a diminishing and ageing congregation or are you bucking the trend? And what are you doing about it?

So you would get a range of answers from different vicars about this and I’m from the liberal/progressive end of the Church. There are situations and circumstances on earth that I think could basically be described as hell, because they are so horrific and so far from what a loving and good world should be like. And actually, the nature of sin is that we probably contribute to them without thinking about it. So for example, there are children working in sweatshops somewhere in the word making things I buy and consume, and I contribute to that system even just by going about my life and behaving neutrally, if that makes sense, because the nature of the world is that sometimes it is skewed towards sin and you have to proactively seek out doing good, and we all fall short of that because we’re all imperfect.

In terms of the afterlife, I believe God never stops loving us, even when we die. If some people really don’t want to spend eternity with God and want to reject heaven then I don’t think God would force it on someone, because he gave us free will. And maybe some people’s hearts are so hateful that they would rather not be in heaven? And since God created every thing, I guess there could be a kind of nothingness away from God? But I struggle
to accept that God’s love wouldn’t eventually win everyone over to heaven in the end.

That’s not so much of a problem round here as it used to be because at the moment most of our local primaries are struggling to fill their places, including the church ones. I think it’s probably more of a problem in places like London. I wouldn’t want to judge why anyone turns up at church, unless they’re genuinely taking the piss and obviously exploiting the system.

Do you do confessional?
If so, has anybody ever confessed anything that you have needed to take to the authorities?

That’s a fair question! So I’m in charge of four churches. Two are doing pretty well and have a good group of young families. We have a toddler group and some family services, but I wouldn’t personally take credit for that as it’s a team of volunteers who are enthusiastic about making that happen. The other two are much smaller and in decline, and have been more resistant to having kids in church and to the idea of changing anything. To be honest some will probably have to close in the next couple of decades.

I personally go to confession occasionally as part of my spiritual practice, especially in Lent, but no it’s not really a thing round here. I think Anglicans who go to confession would generally be more Anglo-Catholic and so probably less likely to want to see a female priest.

I do occasionally hear things in less formal contexts that are crimes, due to the nature of having a lot of relationships in the community. And deal with the aftermath of tragedies and sometimes crimes. For example recently I stumbled upon some voter fraud. Sadly I come across a lot of domestic violence and that kind of hidden crime in our communities. What I would do with that information depends on the circumstances of the particular situation.

I’m coming at his from the angle of a non-UK Catholic-raised atheist, who still finds lots of elements of the C of E exotic, like married and women priests with children, and priests being able to dictate their movements between jobs. A couple of questions —

has the C of E priesthood become downgraded in prestige since women were admitted, as is the case with many other traditionally male roles? If you’re female, have you had issues with parishioners rejecting communion from you?

all of my contact with Anglicanism was in my (v high church, traditionalist, intellectually sophisticated) UK university town, until I moved to a village in the midlands where I was gobsmacked to attend my first service and find a very different version, with the vicar a Biblical literalist who walked the church singing ‘Jesus is the king of the jungle’ with gorilla actions (and, once I got to know him better, very credulous and narrow-minded).

my question is, given the wide variety of different stripes of C of E, how do you know you’ll be a good fit for a parish if you’re contemplating a move there? Are there job ads that say ‘Parish X is evangelical and socially conservative etc’? As you can choose your own movements, what would make you look to move parishes?

as I come from a context with celibate clergy whose only income, for parish jobs, is two annual church collections, can I ask how much a vicar is paid? Is there a standard salary, or does it vary with parish size or other reasons?

Thank you!

Do you mind people wondering into church for a bit of quiet reflection? I will quite often do this if I’m out on a walk (rural but weirdly within walking distance of multiple churches) and I sometimes wonder if it’s a bit rude? I’m not a practising Christian and would largely consider myself to be a of vaguely Unitarian leanings but something about Churches gives me an immense feeling of peace.

I am on the PCC of a church that sounds a bit like yours. We are currently in interregnum and I have been asked to help on interviews for potential new vicars (we are not at that stage yet, the process is glacial).

We are an aging and small congregation (I am early 40s and the youngest by a considerable margin, my daughter is the only child that regularly attends).

However the whole congregation is so open to change and would love to welcome new people in and they love it when we do have children around. We have tried engagement with the local primary school, but they are resistant to anything pro-Christian.

What would attract you to be the vicar at our parish (2 churches)? What would you recommend we do to grow the congregation?

What's the point in pretending to be a Christian when you clearly don't believe in the biblical teachings? Taking on the role of vicar even though you're a woman, claiming to be a "progressive", etc. Nothing inherently wrong with believing in "progressive" values, but I can't understand why you want to hold these views while larping as a Christian, who would hold views antithetical to those.

And before you respond with "most people in my parish are fine with this", that shouldn't really matter that they also aren't really Christians, it's quite a different thing when you hold yourself as an authority figure in the church. Surely it's the responsibility of figures in the church to actually believe and profess biblical teachings?

Thanks for these questions! Yes there is still a lot of gender inequality in the CofE, even though we have women bishops now. For example, big churches of more than 300 people are more likely to be run by male vicars and more female vicars are unpaid.

Personally I’ve barely faced any prejudice about being a female priest because my predecessor in this role was also a woman so people round here are very used to it. And it tends to vary by area and this diocese is generally pretty affirming of women.

You’re right that it varies massively. There is definitely code to look for when applying for jobs. For example, if a church decribes itself as “Bible believing” I would read that as not accepting of LGBT people. If you were wondering what your local church’s stance is I would just email the vicar and see what they say.

Do you get a stipend?

Do you think it’s a concern that retiree vicars are so common it’s become a way of the C of E dodging payment and this few young people and non-middle class people enter

I really do as you can probably tell. The C of E is wealthy and should be paying its bloody staff.

Ah yes, a bigot out in the wild! I was waiting for one to turn up. The Bible is an ancient text written over 2000 years ago, as well as being the divinely inspired Word of God. Everyone who believes also interprets it, for example I doubt you follow all the laws in Leviticus or keep slaves or multiple wives? It’s just some of us have more honesty about the fact that we interpret it.

And I’m a Christian, 100%. I affirm the creeds and I believe in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus and everything that means for salvation and redemption. I would never presume to tell someone else they weren’t a “real” Christian and I suggest you repent of your judgemental heart. “Larping” is just rude: I’ve been ordained by a bishop through an apostolic line that runs right back to St Peter and I have a lot of academic theological training. Have some respect.

Good morning vicar

Thank you for taking the time to do this. I am Serbian Orthodox and not very educated on C of E doctrine, therefore I would like to ask where you stand on justification doctrine. Is it sola fide or by good works?

Also, where do you stand on the Divine Nature of Christ in the flesh? Do you believe that he could truly be God and Man at the same time or did he have to become fully Man to redeem the world?

Also, do you believe that the age of miracles is past or can it still persist?

Thank you and God Bless

Yes: I’m on the incumbent stipend for my diocese. And yes, I think it is a problem especially when you look at the gender imbalance and see that more women are working for free. It’s complicated: some diocese are wealthier than others. There is an argument that we should just pool our resources.

Wow, great questions! Sola fide for sure but as the book of James tells us, “faith without works is dead” and we can know the heart of someone by their fruit.

In terms of your Christological question, we would affirm the Chalcedon definition that Christ was fully human and fully God, and that anything else is heresy.

Miracles, now that’s a tricky one! I’ve personally never seen a miracle with my own eyes. What do you think?

Not at all! The parish church is for everyone and I’m really pleased you can find some space there.

Thank you @Holyannie for taking the time to answer my question. I believe the age of miracles through prayer is still with us, God can show us a path forward even when our surroundings seem very bleak, but it's on us to see that through prayer and contemplation.

One last question if I may. Regarding female priests. What is the C of E doctrine that justifies this? I personally don't have a problem with it but it would never be contemplated in the Orthodox Chruch because all of the Apostles were men.

I personally disagree with this as we can see from the Letters of St Paul that there were many women active in the early Church and helping the Apostles financially. However it is not something that I believe Orthodoxy will ever contemplate in my lifetime.

Thank you.

I just wanted to thank you for this answer. The concept of hell has troubled me since I was a child (thanks to Sunday school!) and this response was sense - compassionate sense.