I am asexual - AMA!

[YouAreNotBatman]

Hello!👋🏻
Feel free to ask me questions.

That's not what I said, though. Sorry you are having trouble comprehending.

I don’t like giving blow jobs

I will never try anal sex

I love being on top

Should I be sharing this info with my parents? There’s no “should” about it.

This person says they are asexual

are you saying that they’re wrong?

What is going to happen if one of your children is asexual? Are they going to hide it from you forever? Are they going to pretend? Or are you never going to ask, ever , about relationships and partners and plans?

A lovely and open relationship with my parents

we have discussed relationships… ups and downs

we have never discussed our sexual appetites or absence thereof

I think I am asexual too. I last had an enjoyable sexual relationship in my teens. Since then I’ve been married and had kids but sex has always been a chore. Now we’re divorced I can’t imagine having sex again. I’ve been very attracted to men over past few years - but not wanting to have sex with them. I have a (low) sex drive but don’t want to have sex with anyone. No trauma.

it’s actually very alienating as everyone asks me why I don’t want a sexual partner and I don’t know what to say. I’d love to meet similar people. And I also want a partner but that’s impossible.

it’s actually very alienating as everyone asks me why I don’t want a sexual partner and I don’t know what to say.

come again??

I am 5 years post divorce
never had a relationship and / or sex in this time

no one has asked me why I “don’t want a sexual partner”

people have asked me whether I’d like to meet anyone

in one context are all these people asking?

That was to @Lastthingreally

Oh I’ve just read the whole thread now. I wouldn’t have posted if I had as was looking for some support / chat not for people being hurtful.

I think this thread very clearly demonstrates why conversation is needed as some people are very very angry with asexuals. For a myriad of their own reasons I guess.

happy to chat with others on this thread separately if anyone wants

@Vegrocks close friends. Do you not discuss sex and relationships ever with your friends?

I want a relationship but I don’t want sex. Which as this thread has proven is a pretty impossible position to be in.

Are you saying parents and relatives don't ask about relationships, and future plans? are you saying asexuals should lie when they answer?
But asexual people aren't against relationships, they just don't want sex. I'm just not convinced parents want to discuss how much sex their children want? I think there is another term for people who don't want relationships.
There have been some people on the thread who've said they are currently asexual which doesn't seem to fit.
I've got friends with varying levels of interest in relationships/sex (not that we talk about sex anymore!) Some friends have no interest in discussing relationships and we just talk about other stuff. I dont think most people are that interested in how much sex a person wants/has, unless they are in a relationship with that person.
So an asexual label is about as relevant as a aholiday person (someone who doesn't like holidays).
Just crack on as you are if you're happy.

Sure. I discuss sex with close friends, maybe three close friends do i discuss sex

you said “everyone” asks you why you don’t want sex. Implies you’re discussing with quite a broad range of people

Everyone always asks

so lots of people ask you repeatedly why you don’t want to have sex?

Support for what?

fact you don’t want sex?

An impossible position to be in?

what are you talking about?

if you find a man that also doesn’t want sex… then all good 🤷‍♀️

Where has anyones compared the probelms of being Asexual "to the actual oppression faced by gays and lesbians"?

@Vegrocks

"what opportunities have you been denied based on being asexual? What freedom does a single heterosexual person enjoy that a single asexual person does not or does not without a struggle?"

Where has anyone claimed any of that?

Did you mean to tag me? If so, please quote!

I have not even remotely said that! 😂

Sorry my post wasn't clear - you asked "what opportunities have you been denied based on being asexual? What freedom does a single heterosexual person enjoy that a single asexual person does not or does not without a struggle?"

I can't see that anyone has said or suggested they have been denied oppertunites or that they have less freedoms because they are Asexual, so I'm wondering what prompted those questions?

Ahh shit, sorry @Vegrocks - that should have been @Nomoreno !

it’s actually very alienating as everyone asks me why I don’t want a sexual partner and I don’t know what to say. I’d love to meet similar people. And I also want a partner but that’s impossible.

Yep, I relate to this.
Except all the way back to the teenage years when everyone got obsessed.

@Vegrocks why are you so angry? You’ve posted 5 posts in a row full of angry missives. Chill out!

Haha yes, eye rolls and not being mean don't go together I'm afraid!!!

Do you have any long term health conditions?

Are you able to reach orgasm when going solo?

Good grief… angry?!

one for hyperbole clearly. Hence your statement about “everyone always asking” about why you don’t want sex!

There are different experiences of being asexual, same as there are different experiences of being gay or straight.

Most asexuals don't want relationships

some do

some want entirely platonic relationships , for company, raising children, financial security

Some want physical affection

some are not asexual for the whole of their lives, exactly the same way some straight people are not straight for the whole of their lives, and some gay people are not gay for the whole of their lives