I’m an alcoholic and my child is on a child protection plan AMA

[Pengola87]

Just that really

How does that make you feel?

How did social services find out about your alcoholism?

How old is your child and if he understand what's going on what does he say to you?

Sorry or she !

How are you doing at the moment?

How long have you been on a s47? Are the LA actually supporting you to get help? Do you want help?

No questions OP but I hope you get the help you need and I hope your child does too.

Do you want to get better?

My mum was an alcoholic, and eventually died from liver disease. Ive always wondered if she ever actually wanted to get better or not or we were second to the alcohol.

Is you child still with you or with other parent/in temp foster care? Is there a plan to keep your family intact?

Do you agree your child should be on a protection plan? Are you still drinking / plan to stop / plan to not stop?

Sorry to hear that OP. I hope things turn out well for you.

No qiestions, I just wish you recovery and hope that you and your child can live a happy life together! Take care and be strong ❤️

How worried are you that you may lose your child? Enough for you to get help to quit drinking, if you’re not doing so already,

In your opinion what is the best thing the Local authority and other services available can do to help your current situation.

Was one of your parents an alcoholic?

After you getting independent support for yourself, e.g. from a women's centre? I've worked with women whose children are being looked after and the relationship with social services can be really confusing.

My other question that you don't have to answer because it might feel a bit personal, would be have you experienced trauma of any type yourself, and if so, do you understand how it has impacted you?

Are you sober OP?

I went into rehab at 22 and fell pregnant with my daughter in there. Prior to that I had a traumatic experience at school that led to me drinking and then leaving home/working in massage parlours at 17. I did 8 months in treatment and was thrown out after getting pregnant. The midwife came to visit me in a dry house but I got my own flat and was sober for 3 years. I had my own business and was doing really well but then I started ‘socially’ drinking which was fine for a couple of years but then started to become problematic. It has been the last couple of years things have really spiralled out of control and over lockdown that things become bad. It’s probably only since August and after being signed off work that my drinking has reached a dependent level. I have been screaming out for help for a long time but unfortunately things are very different compared to when I accessed treatment 10 years ago and there is so little help for addiction/mental health services especially in Covid times. I have had to take out a loan to pay for rehab for 5 weeks as if I didn’t I would lose my daughter for good. She is with family at the moment and things are bad enough for social services to remove her/consider her at risk of neglect but their solution for me is to keep a drink diary...

If you know you will loose her if you don’t stop drinking, and you have only been drinking at a level considered problematic to social services for 8 weeks, then why not just stop? Why is that not enough?

So sorry you're going through this OP. I can't begin to understand addiction and alcohol dependence. But you've taken steps to address it and safeguard your daughter by getting help. As hard as it is and without sounding patronising.. That's the first step to recovery and you should be proud of yourself. X

@TobblyBobbly

Was one of your parents an alcoholic?

No, very normal and stable upbringing. I think it was things in my teenage years that caused me to turn to alcohol and in all honesty I think there is something ‘in me’ that has a destructive/addictive trait which has been there since childhood. I also have a diagnosis of bipolar disorder but gave received little help with that

Sorry not a question; I think that support for alcohol misuse is another casualty of Covid. In my area people have to self refer and only telephone help is available. It must be difficult if you are recognising your problem and want to get clean

@PotteringAlong

If you know you will loose her if you don’t stop drinking, and you have only been drinking at a level considered problematic to social services for 8 weeks, then why not just stop? Why is that not enough?

Because things have progressed in the last few months to the stage where I am experiencing physical withdrawals and it’s a vicious cycle of not wanting to drink but feeling so ill you need to drink! And as is the nature of addiction it’s not so easy to monitor it once you start. My tolerance is a lot higher than it was and I require more to feel ‘normal’. It’s not about drinking to get drunk. This was my issue with social services and the woeful misunderstandings when it comes to addiction, specifically alcohol and I’m the attitude of if you want it bad enough you would just stop. One said to me just wait until your child is a few years older and you can leave them while you go on nights out!!! 🤦🏻‍♀️