I'm a midwife who works in abortion care. AMA

[GlitteryPoopooplop]

Go ahead. I'll try and answer everything the best way I can. Sorry if this is boring (I love my job and can go on about it a bit.)!

@Drogosnextwife I don't think @Lalalalalalalalaland was saying her mum came up with it.

I can understand your reasoning behind late term abortions OP. I don't think anyone would do it on a whim.

Still surprising that someone who works in this area has never heard it.

@wildwildwest1 thankfully this counts for revalidation. We have to do a certain amount of midwifery hours but this definitely counts. I feel more "with woman" than I often was able to as a traditional midwife. I feel I give a lot more support now.

Sorry if I've missed any questions.

I can’t quite believe that there are so many women living such privileged lives that they can just say, “well why don’t these women get help?” Can you really not imagine how many vulnerable women there are? Where and how do you propose they get this help from? They are in abusive relationships, they have very little education, they have no money, they have no self esteem. It’s a nasty vicious cycle they are in. Far better to give repeat abortions than for them to continually have their children removed by social services.

Do you think antenatal depression (in a previously wanted pregnancy) is a factor in many abortions you see, and how well do you think this is understood?

Do you think there is enough support for women post abortion who may struggle with their feelings about it?

You have no idea where any of us come from or what we have witnessed or who we know IRL, because we don't agree with woman having repeat abortions doesn't mean we are privileged. I can tell you right now my family are far from fucking privileged and I know many people who have had abortions for many different reason.

Not all midwives deliver babies in the course of their day to day work, wildwild

I’m a nurse who works in a mostly outreach role and it still counts toward my NMC practice hours (as it does for registered nurses and MW in academia and those in non clinical management roles). If I wanted to go back to the wards and use clinical skills I’ve not used for ages, for example start taking bloods again, I’d have to redo my competency training first. The 450 hours (over 3yrs) is for nurses & midwives who do the odd bank shift here and there but don’t really practice anymore.

Its not about agreeing with it. It’s about the flippant, “well why don’t they get help” comments.

No not one single person said that did they? They said why are they not being given the help they need? Instead of being given multiple abortions that will very likely have an impact on their fertility and their mental health.

There have been massive cuts to the numbers of Women’s shelters/DV organisations in recent years. ‘Getting help’ is both a psychological challenge for isolated, abused, coerced women and a logistical one in terms of actual availability.

Same with termination counselling/support services. It varies massively from area to area but as budgets are strangled, these ‘non essential’ services are the first to go. You are lucky if there is a recorded helpline in your area now. It is probably just leaflets or signposting to a private sector provider.

I’m struggling with believing abortion should be allowed until full term, why is it ok to kill a healthy full term baby but not kill one that’s slready been born, should these women in awful situations be allowed to smother the newborn because they can’t face the idea of having a baby? It’s awful. If it was just allowed until then women would have very late terminations for lesser reasons, maybe more flexibility for the most severe reasons wouldn’t be a terrible thing but just removing the time limit would lead to less educated decisions, like the poster who questioned wether they should even be treated individually like babies, I think some women just don’t understand how developed babies are past a certain point. I should add I have a biased view really as my daughter was stillborn and she was no less a human than my living children, and I’ve had a premature baby so I guess I’ve seen how developed babies are earlier on.

Apologies OP, you have a very valid opinion with very good reasons for it by the sound of it, you sound like a great midwife, I just had to get it off my chest, it fills me with dread that medical staff may have considered my stillborn daughter nothing more than medical waste because she never existed without me.

Do you see many cases were the abortion fails? You hear of it in soaps were the abortion doesn’t work and the baby sticks, I’ve always wondered how common that is in real life.

@Alb1 I'm so so sorry about your daughter. I can assure you that nobody would have thought of your daughter like that.

Definitely see failed abortion, frequently. With medical treatment there's about a 1-5% failure rate. It's rubbish because the drugs we've given can cause birth defects so often women feel extra extra terrible. Like they're being punished. We'd recommend that they go on to have surgical treatment if the pregnancy is continuing.

I had to have a medical abortion at 8 weeks. Roughly 6-7 weeks ago, i had the heavy bleeding and blood clots. Pretty certain it all passed through ok. I was constantly bleeding until recently when i stopped for about a week. Im bleeding again now which would be my first period but its so heavy. Ive had to change my trousers 4 times in 2 days, twice in one morning because its so heavy! Im also passing blood clots again. My dr is awful and shrugs off any thing i go in for, But should i go see a dr for the heavy bleeding and blood clots or would you say its normal?

@Morgan2019 I'd call the place where you had the treatment done to be honest you might have some retained tissue which they might be able to help you with. Dr appointment would be next best. A&e if it gets very heavy. Good luck. Let me know how you get on. X

Thank you x

I realise this isn’t intended to be a pro-life / pro-choice debate but I agree with you @Blossom28 @Littlemisshappy19 @Drogosnextwife

@Alb1 I’m sorry for your loss. My baby girl was stillborn at full term in February this year so I understand where you are coming from.

The 'how could a medical professional possibly be ok with X' in relation to late term abortions is always such a weird one. It's rather obvious such people have little grasp of actual empathy and compassion. Who the hell would go into a medical role and, rather than wanting to have compassion and do the best they can for the actual human being they are tasked with looking after, instead choose to prioritise the imagined wants/needs/rights of some potential human being currently being hosted in their body? What kind of a medical professional would that make you?!

I believe ( May be wrong) that in Australia if a birth takes place after 20 weeks a name must be given and death certificate must be issued. Does that need to happen in late term abortions?

Thank-you for the work you do.

People are regulars. I can think of 3 I know who are regulars because their partners are controlling /abusive so they can't have contraception in case it's found. The men get them pregnant on purpose, the women then have to sneak away and have an abortion without the man knowing. Do you think they should have to keep their babies?

it can be hard to get away from someone who tracks your phone to go to drs appointments without them knowing why you're there. A man could feel a coil, or an implant, they could find pills. Obviously we strongly encourage contraception use and have a fantastic safe guarding team who help with that side. But we cannot force women away from their partners, regardless of how evil they seem. Women will sometimes tell them they've miscarried, or not tell them about the pregnancy etc.

Hold on?! I am missing something here?!

Their controlling partner is tracking their phone, so she cant have the conceptive injection but she can be tracked still and have an abortion?!

What?????

Exactly my point LittleMissHappy19.

Little
Most gps surgeries send text messages/emails now to remind you of your appointment. Abortion clinics don't do that.
Plus if you are going to see your GP you could bump in to people you know who could mention it to the abusive partner.
If you bumped in to someone at an abortion clinic I doubt the other person would mention seeing you as given they are also there for a reason.

I know women whos abusive partners go to the DR with them and if you are on contraception this is sometimes brought up even if thats not the reason for your visit. I can see why for women in this situation an abortion is a safer option than contraception.

What kind of a medical professional would that make you?! hmm

I think you will find there are not very many medical professionals who are willing to carry out late term abortion without severe medical reasons. That makes them humans with feelings.

Umm am I still missing the point here?!

We are on about a phone being TRACKED!!

So her abusive partner can see exactly where she is!!

And in regards to other posters trying to give examples of women coming in for full term abortions like medical reasons.

We are not discussing that! The OP stated that they think the law should be ANY gestation time meaning up until 42 weeks if they go over, for ANY reason they want!

We are on about a phone being TRACKED!!

I assumed tracked as in tracking texts and emails. If the phone is tracked via a find my phone app then it would be more difficult however not impossible to leave the phone at home/battery died so that the woman could attend the appointment. There is no follow up, no need to go back to the gp for more tablets/injection and no concern that the gp will mention it at a later date with the abuser present.

Taking contraception is obviously the "easier" option however having worked with abused women I understand why that is not always the safest option for them.

As for the abortion limit we have one is this country so the cries of "how could you abort a full term pregnancy" are pointless.
I agree women should have access to safe abortions at any stage because I am fully pro choice.