I'm a midwife who works in abortion care. AMA

[GlitteryPoopooplop]

Go ahead. I'll try and answer everything the best way I can. Sorry if this is boring (I love my job and can go on about it a bit.)!

[GlitteryPoopooplop]

You mentioned that you see the woman on her own and then admit whoever is accompanying her so that you can be sure she is not being forced into an abortion - if it turns out that she is, how can you safeguard her?

It varies depending on the situation. We have safeguarding forms which are designed to ask more details about what's going on with the client. We have have the police in before, in extreme circumstances. We have access to women's aid etc etc.

[Tensun15]

Is it too early to have a surgical abortion at 4 weeks? And do you think having a local anthestic is painful or ok... also can the coil be fitted at the same time? Thankyou

[GlitteryPoopooplop]

@tensun15 It depends, 4 weeks isn't possible to see on scan generally, unless you mean 4 weeks since conception (which would be 6 weeks pregnant). You can definitely elect to have surgical abortion early, as long as its been confirmed by scan. It's slightly more complicated before 7 weeks because the pregnancy is so small so the dr just has to do some extra checks.

We put coils in at the same time as surgical abortion, in fact it's a great time to have one put in.

Local anesthetic really depends on the person. It's very very quick (5 or 10 minutes) so lots of people are fine, but also, some people find it terrible, and struggle to cope. Usually clients feel fine within an hour or so after the procedure.

[Tensun15]

@GlitteryPoopooplop I am at a Nupas now. Waiting for my consultation. Due to having a lletz last year they say I might need to have it under GA.

Will know more after the consultation.. but might also have to come back if internal scan doesn't show clearly .

Thankyou for getting back to me x

[GlitteryPoopooplop]

Good luck. Let us know how you get on. X

[Tensun15]

@GlitteryPoopooplop I have to go back in 2 weeks as the scan didn't show . All the ladies I saw today were really lovely and helpful. Due to the lletz I will have to have a GA so will carry on as normal (well try) until then.

Also I will be having the coil

Thankyou x

[Maybeitsjustmeor]

I had an abortion at 14 after being raped. Worst experience of my life I remember fainting and I was walked back to my room with my Robe open so everyone saw the back of me naked but they didn't care.

Was so painful didn't realise how painful it would be.

[Maybeitsjustmeor]

I'm glad there's people like you doing this job it must be so hard. I was 12 to 14 weeks so had like the tablets inserted with a tampon was really hard.

[TurquoiseTurtles]

@Maybeitsjustmeor I'm so so sorry you had to go through that. I'm glad you felt supported.

[Maybeitsjustmeor]

Thanks. It was a long time ago so I'm hoping things have changed a lot since then.

[miamamamia]

Thanks for this thread OP, it's much appreciated to read how it is from a HCP point of view.

Thankfully when I had a surgical abortion aged 17 I experienced nothing but kindness from the nurses on the day of the procedure. Going under GA (I'd been referred on the NHS by sympathetic GP and after a scan showed I was 14 weeks was scolded by an aged Consultant for being so shameless as to have sex and to refrain if I didn't want a baby and that there were no options and I'd have to have the baby. Me and my mam went back to GP who was disgusted but not surprised and pointed me in the direction of BPAS (forgot to say this is early 1990's)

My dad drove me down to the private clinic, I think it was called ?Danham Lodge, in Doncaster 4 hours drive away and I had a consultation with a doctor with no nurse chaperone. I was told to completely strip naked and lie on the bed where he did a breast and vaginal examination. I remember feeling traumatised but just assumed this was the norm?

I was booked into a B&B directly opposite for the procedure to be done the next day and I remember the kindness of the landlady - obviously she'd had lots of girls/women staying previously. She gave me an alarm call next morning and on my way out the door gave my arm a squeeze and said 'you'll be fine'.

After booking in I was shown to a 4 bed bay where by we all stated why were there (voluntarily) - only lady who had an obvious bump in the bed next to me was there because she'd briefly split up from her husband and had slept with a black partner so was worried the baby would be mixed race (she was scanned and too far to have the procedure). Another was a 14 year old whose brother had made her pregnant.

My most prominent memory is the lovely nurse who held my hand going down to theatre and reassuring me, she was so kind and stroked my face and wiped the tears away and told me I WOULD be ok. I'll never forget her.

When I woke up from the GA I was crying though I don't remember it and the same nurse held my hand back to the ward. We were given a cooked meal at tea-time in a canteen style set-up and my dad picked me up the next morning. Before this my dad and I were never very close but it definitely brought us together - I'll never forget how supportive mam and dad were.

Sorry for the essay but this has brought the memories of it all back to me - and I can absolutely say, even aged 17, I absolutely did not take the decision lightly or think it was a form of birth control. I was a naive 17 year old just out of an abusive relationship where he was finally jailed for violence and stalking.

Thank God for people like you OP :)

[Sieh]

Hello how many people back out of the abortion at the surgical table

[Threebutterflies]

Hi are you still on here @GlitteryPoopooplop

[EvePolastrisFace]

Hello. I certainly am. Are you ok?

[Threebutterflies]

Ahhh ok I take it it’s you with a name change ? Do you still work int he same job?
I just wondered if you have to do any kind of counselling as it must be quite hard seeing what you do each day ? Even if someone Is completely pro choice seeing aborted babies must be really hard . Do you have anyone to talk to about it ? Also is this a picture of a 6-8 week abortion?
somone on mumsnet sent it to me. But another lady said she had an abortion at 8 weeks and saw the babies face and features etc.
thankyou for answering my questions x

[ElephantePicante]

Christ @LittleMissHappy19 is more Little Miss Pain in the Arse by the look of things. OP thank you for what you do. Another as early as possible and as late as necessary supporter here. Women's bodies, Women's choice, always.

[Childbeinganiggtmare]

I have Tokophobia (I started a thread about it on here). I had to have a termination as it really was me or the baby. I had a coil inserted after, this was done at a mainstream hospital to due to my condition I’ll add. I notice on your thread you say gay insert one, are women given this option? I know the reason for it but I wasn’t asked and it was just done while I was under anaesthesia, I felt violated after that I wasn’t asked if I wanted one.

[stillvicarinatutu]

I had a termination for medical reasons at 16 weeks . My care was non existent. They forgot I was there and didn't order a sandwich at lunch (not that I could have eaten it I was too busy throwing up) but the midwife who took over at shift change was young , I was just another job . Even as she was picking out bits of placenta with tweezers because it didn't come away naturally. The orderly shouted at me for going to the actual toilet because I was sick of throwing up and having diarrhoea on a commode in front of my then partner . Of course when I went to the loos the baby came . I have never felt more humiliated, never felt more like a piece of meat in my life .
This was a much wanted baby girl . She had a chromosome disorder. I'd wanted a surgical termination and they told me it was too risky so had to be induced . It's put me off hospital for life .

[Thinkingblonde]

@stillvicarinatutu

I had a termination for medical reasons at 16 weeks . My care was non existent. They forgot I was there and didn't order a sandwich at lunch (not that I could have eaten it I was too busy throwing up) but the midwife who took over at shift change was young , I was just another job . Even as she was picking out bits of placenta with tweezers because it didn't come away naturally. The orderly shouted at me for going to the actual toilet because I was sick of throwing up and having diarrhoea on a commode in front of my then partner . Of course when I went to the loos the baby came . I have never felt more humiliated, never felt more like a piece of meat in my life .
This was a much wanted baby girl . She had a chromosome disorder. I'd wanted a surgical termination and they told me it was too risky so had to be induced . It's put me off hospital for life .

I’m so sorry you had to go through such an ordeal.
I had a miscarriage at 14weeks. I’d started bleeding at 11 weeks, it stopped but it started again at 13 week. I was admitted to a general womens ward for observation, the only pregnant woman on the ward. The first two nights were uneventful, total bed rest, not allowed to get out of bed even for the loo, bed pans and commodes, Nice.
The third day things ramped up, cramping, backache discharge. I was left alone sat on a commode, behind a curtain during visiting hours, losing my baby, I d sent dh home with our 2 year old dd, didn’t want her to see me in distress.
A nurse came and helped me back into but left the commode uncovered, I saw my little boy, the nurse said she’d need to examine it as it looked incomplete. I needed to have a D&C next day as some tissue was left behind.