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I lost a child 23 years ago at Dunblane. AMA

288 replies

dunblanemum · 13/03/2019 08:36

I have used this username a few times over the years but am a long time MN user.

I will answer any questions you have - apart from who my child was. I need a little privacy.

I am not doing this to whip up sympathy, i have made my peace with it. It is just in my mind today obviously and i know people i meet often have questions but feel embarrassed about asking. Ask away.

OP posts:

RaininSummer · 14/03/2019 00:03

Thank you OP. A sad read but also uplifting in how you have coped and not let it destroy your family. Bless them all. Never forgotten.


nocoolnamesleft · 14/03/2019 00:29

Not a question: I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for being able to answer questions on here. But mostly thank you for the legacy that you and the other families ensured. Thank you so much for the changes in the gun laws. Thank you for all the lives you helped to save. Thank you that most British hospitals hardly ever see a gunshot wound. Thank you that for making our schools safer, our communities safer, our children safer. To have come out of such a tragedy to achieve something so important, so amazing, leaves me near speechless.

Thank you.


pombear · 14/03/2019 00:50

And i never have. I give him as little space in my mind as i possibly can.

This is so powerful dunblanemum.

Thank you for sharing your story. And for sharing who your DD was.

I don't have a question, but to let you know that a small 'butterfly effect' of Dunblane is that I walked away from the job I had at the time very soon after. Because of the way a colleague viewed the shooting directly relating to our jobs. It was the final straw that turned me away from what I was doing at the time.

And I'm now in a job many years' later that aims to constructively support people. I will never forget that colleague's comment, and how it drove me to change what I did.

I know it's no consolation, and a tiny thing, but Dunblane had ripple effects in so many areas of life that will probably never be known.

I will remember your daughter, and all those affected by that day, today and often in the future.


klingon85 · 15/03/2019 19:22

I don't have anything to ask but I'm so very sorry


notsodimwit · 23/03/2019 03:46

So sad opFlowers


MutantDisco · 23/03/2019 04:44

Thank you OP. I have never forgotten your daughter and her classmates (I was 15 in 1996).

I'm a teacher (secondary) and a few years ago I had a sixth form tutor group who were criticising Andy Murray for being 'grumpy' or some such. I played them a clip of him talking about that day, and breaking down. They were all shocked to the core and much more understanding in the knowledge that he had been through something awful.



SavageBeauty73 · 25/03/2019 21:47

I'm so sorry for your loss. You come over as a lovely, sorted, wonderful person.

Were you tempted to home educate your younger daughters?


Hellenbackagen · 25/03/2019 22:16

Bless you . Just read all the names of
The poor babies and thought of each and every one of them


PotteringAlong · 13/03/2021 15:53

@dunblanemum my thoughts are with you, and all of the parents and families of your children today.


Esse321 · 13/03/2021 17:02

So sorry for your loss Flowers


CarrotIsApple · 16/03/2021 13:40


PantherPantherus · 21/03/2021 01:36

I was driving home from work and turned the car radio on to listen to the news at 6pm. As I drove home to my two children (2 and 4) I realised that God did not exist and we are all we have.

I remember the exact point in my journey the story was announced and each time I pass that spot I still remember.


MrsMarkRonson · 15/03/2023 07:30

I stumbled across this thread a couple of days ago (coincidentally March 13). I made sure I lit a candle that night.
@dunblanemum Flowers To you and everyone else who has lost a child.
@nocoolnamesleft What a beautiful post, and yes Thank you OP.

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