ex prostitute here ask me anything

[Opheliah]

Has this one been done yet?

I am not Belle de Jour.

This leads me on to a question I've been dying to ask.

I used to work with a girl, she did the same job as me so I know roughly what she was on - not pittance but by no means wadded.

She had a very lavish lifestyle, apartment at an exclusive block that cost more than I was on a month, new designer handbag every couple of months, mega holidays. She used to party with footballers and business men at all the best clubs and restaurants.

Something must have been 'going on' but I could never figure out what.

Do you hear of girls who work in a relatively normal job during the day and then do the parties at night and get paid for sex?

I only had contact with one other wg through the website i operated on and she was fulltime. I suppose i sort of fitted your description at the time, minus lavish lifestyle and footballers!

Are clients ever curious about how you became a WG? Has one ever tried to 'rescue' you?
Yeah, you get asked really personal stuff about your life and why are you doing it and "but you're better than this you obviously have a brain you should be using it" and things... I'm not sure about ever being rescued but once a client, I got the suspicion he wanted more from me emotionally and definitely made it clear that "he'd look after me" if I wanted to quit.

Are there part time escorts and occasional 'pin money' type WGs too?
Yeah, you get all types some doing it just once a year before Christmas or whenever. Some migrant workers come over here just for a holiday, make a bundle and back home the currency goes a very long way.

Yes I did exactly that for a while I had this dull part time job but sex worked for my main income (it sounds like she was making far more at it than I was though!).
The day job helped the disguise so I could just say that was my job and no one questioned how I was making money. (like my boyfriend )...

Although saying that your colleague could just have had rich parents. I had a friend who's dad sent her £1000 a month. Well jell.

^Do you hear of girls who work in a relatively normal job during the day and then do the parties at night and get paid for sex? (I forgot to put the question)

Just want to say thanks everyone for being really respectful. I was worried about more of a hard time as I appreciate it's an emotive subject.
I apologise for those of you who have had emotions upset from reading on here...

@BeverlyGoldberg hello, yes it does happen. Some women just have a very high sex drive and it is the thrill of having sex with strangers for them. And you will find most of them will sneek off at lunchtime, take appointments in the evenings or weekends and it works for them.

But you also a lot recently with the cost of living being so high and a lot of single moms working but needing a supplement to their income have taken up escorting during the times that children are at dads or on weekends when kids are with grandparents etc.

Independent work has become very popular as you can choose who you want to see and you can turn someone away if you are not comfortable or for whatever reason you might have. I know people ask can it be dangerous and yes there is a possibility but if you are sensible and follow your gut then you can be safe.

With independent work you state your rates you are in control with regards to how many clients you want to see etc.

For me personally I never used to see big men as in girth and length and I never used to see men under 30. Why you might ask. Well the size as I knew what I was comfortable with as for the age, young men tend to be quite aggressive during sex due to their inexperience and I had one where i nearly ended up with whiplash from a 26yr old.

Do clients try and rescue you or ask you why as you seem like such a nice girl. Yes they do, yes you do get asked out on dates but that is purely because they assume they will have a whore on tap without the need to pay for it. Guys tend to be quite disappointed when they realised that behind the facade you are just another comfy knicker wearing, no make up, flat shoes and jeans mom who has exactly the same complaints as any other woman. Poof the bubble is blown for them.

As for sexual health, yes there are risks but there are also ways of you avoiding them. The clinics are very helpful and run full spec tests on you. You have condoms for oral and penetration and for me personally if i noticed any lump or what looked like a wart on his willy, I would keep £20 hand him the rest of his fee and wish him well. Oral health was also very important to me, I did not kiss smokers or those with bad teeth or smelly breath.

I am not here to promote sex work or talk about how fabulous it was but for me a woman in my mid 30's, in the early days of internet advertising I did enjoy it. I made a lot of friends, I learnt a lot, it made me stronger and happier as a person after 20 plus years of being made to feel like nothing because I was a BBW. Mentally and physically I was in a such a good place that even my PCOS could not stop me from falling pregnant. And what a Blessing my DD is and has been.

I enjoyed it, I had my ups and downs predominantly with professional jealous because how can a fat woman like me be popular, but I look back on it fondly. I am not embarrassed about my past.

It is a taboo because society dictates it but as a free woman I should be allowed to make my own choices and people need to keep their judgments to themselves.

I just wanted to say how appreciative I am of the WGs who have shared their experiences on this thread.

I have read so many threads on MN slating sex workers for somehow letting women down, and as an ex stripper this has always sat uncomfortably with me.

MN has the reputation of having a relatively wealthy, middle class demographic, and I've never seen any understanding of the financial pressures that could drive a woman into prostitution.

Women are still more likely to be doing the toughest, lowest paid jobs in this society, and if your choice is between cleaning up faeces and risking personal attack as the personal carer for an elderly person with dementia for £8.00 per hour, or cleaning up semen and risking personal attack as a prostitute for £100 per hour, it's easy to understand why a woman wouldn't necessarily opt for the former.

(I'm not really referring to the WGs posting on this thread in this, who seem to have had other career options, just making observations that womens' choices are affected by a potent combination of capitalism and patriarchy).

@srubbornstains but it is true though. If you look at how many students, single stay at home mom's or working single mom's do this to supplement their income it is a very big demographic group.

Student loans are ridiculous and if it means showing your books on cam or taking one or two clients a week to support yourself then that is their choice and who are we to judge.

If a sahm or work in mom can just not get her salary to stretch far enough to buy her kids nice stuff or put decent food on the table or pay her bills who are we to judge.

It is called survival.

Very interesting reading thanks OP & others.

However a lot of MN woud say that legal prostitution should be banned etc. Seeing that this profession has been there since well, the beginning of time, what forms of leglisation would work, question for the OP and others in the profession?

And of course if you did ban it all that would happen is it would all carry on underground with probally less protection for exploited women. And men too, I believe male escorts to do exist for other men?.

@justaboy you are right unfortunately these moral crusaders do not seem to grasp that when it is made impossible for indies or women who choose to work as pro's to work. And they have to han up their stilleto's that the only option left would be under ground brothels that will more than likely be worked by trafficked girls.

So the traffickers will be rich and the girls even more exploited and abused and those who take a chance to work as Indie's more in danger than ever before.

It will never be eradicated unless they concentrate on trafficking but they don't instead they like to use it as an excuse to abolish prostitution.

Do you think if prostitution was totally legal everywhere and acceptable that rates would go down so much it wouldn’t be worth doing?

Rates would never go down if it was made legal.

Prostitution is not illegal, kerb crawling and pandering and pimpin is. That is why if you own a brothel, agencies and working house and take a part of the girls earnings you can be arrested for living off immoral earnings.

That is also why you will find a lot of indies register either as self employed or Ltd company and pay their taxes accordingly.

If wg's were not made to feel like criminals and actually given the help they need regarding reporting crimes etc and have open communication with the police you will find that not only wg's bit also clients would report dubious practices like trafficking and exploitation.

Banning 2 girls from working from an apartment or house together is also not helpful it is as if they want women in to happen to us. But in saying that here are constabilaries who turn a blind eye to it as long as there is no drug involvement or nuisance situations.

Do you think the rates that prostitutes charge are excessive? After all it is far in excess of the living wage. This money has to come out of family money.

Do you think the rates that prostitutes charge are excessive? After all it is far in excess of the living wage. This money has to come out of family money
are you for real??

it doesnt have to come out of family money, it's not an essential like food or rent
or do you think that men are entitled to sexual gratification from women and should be able to get it for £7 an hour?

You have probably come across the "two prostitutes working together then one of them goes to prison for running a brothel" argument, well I suspect there's more to it if that's ever happened like drugs or antisocial behaviour in general.

The problem really is that legally a brothel is defined as a place where more than one woman is engaging in prostitution. Whether the police turn a blind eye or not, the possibility for prosecution is always there.

If there are complaints that more than one woman is operating from an address and the police establish it is true then it is not likely anyone will be prosecuted, no. But you will very likely be 'moved on', and that costs time and money which is a major ball ache.

Legal brothels or the dreaded "mega brothels" increase exploitation of girls by being able to demand more and more from them, attracting migrant workers who may or may not be completely consenting to it (who can tell), and the earning potentials are greatly reduced. Part of this reason is the fact that there is no fear from the owners of being closed down or reported. They are free to utilise economic market forces alone.

Yes, I agree with you here, and would I hate to see the German type mega brothel in the UK. I wouldn't like to see the brothel in it's current state legalised, but for the definition to be changed to allow women to work together.

it doesnt have to come out of family money, it's not an essential like food or rent
or do you think that men are entitled to sexual gratification from women and should be able to get it for £7 an hour?

Neither women nor men are entitled to sexual gratification. It is by mutual consent.

Having done some research on what rates people are charging i am amazed that men are so foolish as to pay it. I do think they are being ripped off. Perhaps the state should regulate the fees that prostitutes can charge?

One would hope that there would be more competition in the market with the widening of EU borders.

well that's an 'interesting' view point Limp

And of course if you did ban it all that would happen is it would all carry on underground with probally less protection for exploited women. And men too, I believe male escorts to do exist for other men?

Yep, loads of them.

@limpopobongo just like any business sex workers have the right to dictate their rates. Even if it is regulated the government will not have the right to dictate what a wg's fees should be just as much as any other business.

As for European competition, eastern European have been working in the UK for years there is no competition.

You will find that most men prefer to see English girls for whatever reason.

Hahahahaaa limp, thanks for the chuckle. The rate is defined by the market, if the demand wasnt there the rate would drop. It is so it hasnt. End of.

Having done some research on what rates people are charging i am amazed that men are so foolish as to pay it. I do think they are being ripped off.

Perhaps you should tell them that