Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Housekeeper playing music- aibu?

488 replies

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 16:24

I live in a large house on a farm. I have a housekeeper who comes in each day between 10-6.

Today I was in the garden and she drove up to the house and parked outside. I could hear her music which annoyed me because I moved to the country for peace and quiet. It wasn't blasting but I don't want to hear any music while I'm outside.

I told her she's not allowed to play music while she's driving on the farm and she seemed a bit upset and was much quieter than normal. I think that might have to do with her personal circumstances because she's currently getting divorced.

Was I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
CanOnlyBeMyself · 22/10/2026 18:34

Yawn.

Mossyfox · 22/10/2026 18:36

If it was while she was meant to be at work then you were within your rights to say no music.

Original poster
NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 18:36

Grammarnut · 22/10/2026 18:33

Where I live it is half term. OP seems VUB. Who tells the housekeeper what
to do in/around her car? The woman should have packed up and driven away.

Edited
Show quote history

Please read all of my post.

OP posts:
vodkaredbullgirl · 22/10/2026 18:36

Yeah ok 🙄

Thought you were going to say while she was working.

wildnwilde · 22/10/2026 18:36

Reverse

CanOnlyBeMyself · 22/10/2026 18:37

Sorry, just rtft. I hope you feel better soon OP.

Original poster
NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 18:40

CanOnlyBeMyself · 22/10/2026 18:37

Sorry, just rtft. I hope you feel better soon OP.

Thank you.

OP posts:
vodkaredbullgirl · 22/10/2026 18:43

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 18:07

I have apologized.

She's getting £27ph in North East England. That's £40k a year as well as free accommodation. It's a very good rate.

I asked her about the dentist and she has an appointment at 7:30pm tonight! My husband is going to drive her there and back home.

Show quote history

That's good to hear, kind of your OH to take her.

TrickyBiscuits · 22/10/2026 18:46

Bless you, OP. Chronic pain can be so aggravating. We all make mistakes but I think our true character is defined by our ability to reflect and rectify. You’re a good egg. Hope you feel better soon.

harbourlightsbaby · 22/10/2026 18:46

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 18:08

I am so sorry. No-one deserves to be spoken to nastily. I hope your day improves.

Show quote history

@NoMusicPlease thank you! My day has improved, my family always help
me put things into perspective.

I hope your day gets better, I think you’ve had a rough one too. We all make mistakes, say the wrong thing at times, especially if we’re ill or in pain. I hope you resolve things with your housekeeper and that you’re both feeling better soon.

madaboutpurple · 22/10/2026 18:49

Watch out or the next thing is your helpers will resign. It is petty to complain about her if she is in her own car.

NotAtMyAge · 22/10/2026 18:50

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 16:28

She had it playing for a couple of minutes while she was gathering her things.

I think she should have turned it off as soon as she stopped the car.

Deleted

ThatChirpyScroller · 22/10/2026 18:53

.

Katemax82 · 22/10/2026 18:55

Are you my ex employer?

DisforDarkChocolate · 22/10/2026 18:57

I hope she finds another job.

I live in the countryside, it's not quiet a lot of the time.

chickencaesersalad · 22/10/2026 18:59

Hmm.. sounds like you’ve had a rethink and have realised how unreasonable your initial reaction was. Good on you OP

BillieWiper · 22/10/2026 19:00

You could've simply requested she turned it down. Not declared she's 'not allowed to play music while driving on the farm'.

Like how petty is that? Unless you can hear it loudly why on earth would you care? It's inside her own car!

I hope she finds a better employer soon. You sound unreasonable.

Yupstillhere · 22/10/2026 19:03

I think you're a bot or AI or from MN HQ as who would phrase it "I told her she's not allowed to" unless you're recreating Downton Abbey single handedly. This fake threads are tedious.

Vitrolinsanity · 22/10/2026 19:05

READ THE OPS POSTS. She’s admitted she was U, she’s apologised.

For the advanced MNers she’s had CANCELLED THE CHEQUE!!!

Vitrolinsanity · 22/10/2026 19:05

READ THE OPS POSTS. She’s admitted she was U, she’s apologised.

For the advanced MNers she’s CANCELLED THE CHEQUE!!!

Vitrolinsanity · 22/10/2026 19:05

READ THE OPS POSTS. She’s admitted she was U, she’s apologised.

For the advanced MNers she’s had CANCELLED THE CHEQUE!!!

mrsCtheRed · 22/10/2026 19:06

Sorry OP, just read your update.

I hope both you and your cleaner are feeling better soon.
Toothache and Migraines are the work of the devil 😔

ToKittyornottoKitty · 22/10/2026 19:07

mrsCtheRed · 22/10/2026 19:06

Sorry OP, just read your update.

I hope both you and your cleaner are feeling better soon.
Toothache and Migraines are the work of the devil 😔

Edited

As are you, with the unnecessary name calling without reading OPs posts

Vitrolinsanity · 22/10/2026 19:07

mrsCtheRed · 22/10/2026 19:06

Sorry OP, just read your update.

I hope both you and your cleaner are feeling better soon.
Toothache and Migraines are the work of the devil 😔

Edited

I think you’ll find that’s actually you now.

momtoboys · 22/10/2026 19:09

This has to be a windup. How entitled do you have to be to make a person turn off their vehicle radio on your property?? This can't be real.

Swipe left for the next trending thread