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Original poster

Poking holes in condoms!

437 replies

condomgate · 20/10/2026 11:43

Just to make it absolutely clear, this isn’t about DH and I.

My friend is 3 months pregnant, her husband is in shock because they were using condoms every time and not one split.

She’s just admitted to me that she used a pin to poke holes in them. Now call me naive but one, I thought that a tiny pin hole would not be able to get somebody pregnant and also I think this is a crime? I’m disgusted with her and I did tell her that.

Regular poster, name changed.

DH and I are good friends with her and her DH and I just don’t feel okay about this. I feel like she’s done something so wrong that I want to avoid them for as long as possible.

OP posts:
VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 11:57

ICouldHaveCheckedFirst · 20/10/2026 11:56

Friend's DS split up with his gf partly because she wanted children and he didn't. They continued as FWB, and of course she became pregnant (and very happy). He took legal advice on his situation which confirmed he'd been tricked but legally he is financially responsible until the child is 18 (and he's paying his due).
I agree OP - it's a shitty thing for either a man or a woman to do in any circumstances frankly.

Nonsense about “being tricked.” He cared more about getting laid than preventing a pregnancy. He had plenty of warning!

SiegfriedSassoon · 20/10/2026 11:58

I remember on a TV programme once a woman sleeping with a rich man was getting the condom out the bin afterwards and inseminating herself with the contents. I think that's how some of these Jude Laws and Hugh Grants have been caught out.

2BarbieOrNot2Barbie · 20/10/2026 11:58

I’ve always wondered how that works in practice. Surely most people just take them out of the wrapper just before use. When would you have time to get a pin out? Think my partner would notice if I stopped everything to get a condom, open it in the bathroom, rummaged around for a pin and then poked holes in it before coming back to the bedroom?

Edited for a typo

OriginalSkang · 20/10/2026 11:58

Naurrr · 20/10/2026 11:47

What size do you think sperms are? Confused

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How many do you imagine are getting through a tiny, presumably not visible to the naked eye hole and how long do you imagine it normally takes someone having unprotected sex the normal way to get pregnant?

JustCallinSick · 20/10/2026 11:59

I’d just pretend I hadn’t heard her confession then go NC. Don’t get involved

AgeingMillennial · 20/10/2026 11:59

ManyMaybes · 20/10/2026 11:54

Outrageous responses on here just dismissing this behaviour as somehow acceptable. Consent is required, how is that not obvious?

Tell men that!

purplecorkheart · 20/10/2026 11:59

I wonder would people feel the same if he interfered with her pill and she became and she became a parent against her will.

Cupofteapleasemilkynottoomilkyonesugar · 20/10/2026 11:59

ByRoseBiscuit · 20/10/2026 11:55

You don’t have to remove it from the packet?!

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holes would be visible? But I suppose he might not notice, in the heat of about to have sex with his horrible girlfriend.

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 11:59

NoCommentingFromNowOn · 20/10/2026 11:57

It doesn’t say that she told him she does.

And a mutually agreed upon form of contraception that is not deliberately sabotaged is fine.

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Yes, there’s plenty of context missing. It sounds like they’re still together and keeping the baby though, so it can’t have been that much of a catastrophe for him.

ByRoseBiscuit · 20/10/2026 11:59

2BarbieOrNot2Barbie · 20/10/2026 11:58

I’ve always wondered how that works in practice. Surely most people just take them out of the wrapper just before use. When would you have time to get a pin out? Think my partner would notice if I stopped everything to get a condom, open it in the bathroom, rummaged around for a pin and then poked holes in it before coming back to the bedroom?

Edited for a typo

Edited

I’m assuming poking the pin through the packet before it is opened?!

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 12:00

purplecorkheart · 20/10/2026 11:59

I wonder would people feel the same if he interfered with her pill and she became and she became a parent against her will.

She wouldn’t because she could have an abortion.

Passaggressfedup · 20/10/2026 12:00

No doubt the woman will come and post on MN in a few month crying how her husband is now invested, not doing his share of the nights and what a horrible man he is, forgetting to mention she engineered to get pregnant against his wishes.

SummerAsh · 20/10/2026 12:00

AgeingMillennial · 20/10/2026 11:44

Meh.

Do they have kids? What’s the situation?

Don’t blame her if he’s strung her along for years or similar

Wow. Based on what you wrote here, you’re an uttering despicable person.

2BarbieOrNot2Barbie · 20/10/2026 12:01

Would that not be noticeable? I suppose it depends if it’s the woman only dealing with the condoms.

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 12:01

ByRoseBiscuit · 20/10/2026 11:59

I’m assuming poking the pin through the packet before it is opened?!

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I think that’d be fairly obvious.

If true, this relationship has bigger problems than a baby. They clearly can’t or don’t communicate well at all.

ByRoseBiscuit · 20/10/2026 12:01

Cupofteapleasemilkynottoomilkyonesugar · 20/10/2026 11:59

holes would be visible? But I suppose he might not notice, in the heat of about to have sex with his horrible girlfriend.

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If you aren’t expecting it I don’t think you would notice, they would only be small and it might be dark as well.

randomchap · 20/10/2026 12:02

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 11:53

If you don’t want kids, and you’re married to a woman who does, you need to have a vasectomy.

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So women can't be trusted? That's bleak

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 12:03

Condoms are only 85% effective. If he didn’t want kids he should have had a vasectomy or got a divorce and found someone else on the same page.

ByRoseBiscuit · 20/10/2026 12:03

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 12:01

I think that’d be fairly obvious.

If true, this relationship has bigger problems than a baby. They clearly can’t or don’t communicate well at all.

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Well it’s more likely than putting a pin through it once it’s out of the packet, not sure how anyone is getting away with that!!

sweetpickle2 · 20/10/2026 12:04

Amazed at the amount of people who don't think a pin hole would be enough to get pregnant. Would you have sex with a condom that you knew had been pin pricked?! I know I wouldn't.

I think it's reprehensible of your friend, but I imagine she's far from the only person to ever do this (of either sex). Anyone else remember how Tanya got pregnant in Footballers Wives?!

SummerAsh · 20/10/2026 12:05

AgeingMillennial · 20/10/2026 11:59

Tell men that!

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Ridiculous deflection. We’re not talking about rape. I hope you’re just rage baiting (and I’ve been caught hook, line and sinker!) and don’t actually believe what you’ve written.

Daygloboo · 20/10/2026 12:05

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 11:47

What’s the context here? They’ve got five kids already and she doesn’t want to get a job, or he’s been stringing her along for a decade saying it’s not the right time?

On the face of it she’s in the wrong… But the context matters.

I cant think of any context mattering if one person wants a kid and the other one doesnt.

JeffLebowski · 20/10/2026 12:05

Shitty behaviour by a shitty person

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 12:06

randomchap · 20/10/2026 12:02

So women can't be trusted? That's bleak

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There’s no context given about their relationship or discussions about children. If he was vehemently anti-child (which we can’t assume he’s not, as they’re still together and keeping the baby) then he should have had a vasectomy or left. By staying and using a fairly ineffective method, he was taking the gamble.

VinegarBinegar · 20/10/2026 12:06

Daygloboo · 20/10/2026 12:05

I cant think of any context mattering if one person wants a kid and the other one doesnt.

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If one person wants a kid and the other doesn’t, they shouldn’t be having sex.